“Hello!” Paridhi froze on hearing the familiar long drawn ‘hello’ on the other end of the phone.

Subrato looked at her and blinked in assurance and encouragement.

“Hello Mummy,” her voice drowned. She wasn’t sure what she should talk about. She feared, rather hoped, that the phone will be slammed down at the other end.

But what she got, instead, was emotional fluster, “Pari. Dear… Where… How… How are you?”

“I am fine Mummy. And you?”

“I am alive. What can I say?” Paridhi sighed. The self-pity. Some things never changed. She had always been so busy wallowing in self-pity that she never paid any attention to what her children’s dreams and aspirations were.

Paridhi was wondering how to continue the conversation when to her relief her mother spoke again, “You are in America?”

“Yes.”

“All by yourself?”

“I am independent – yes. But I have had help.”

“From whom?”

“Will tell you some other time. How is Dadi?”

“She has left us. Passed away. It has been six months.”

“Ohh!” Paridhi didn’t know how to react. She had always accepted that domineering woman’s presence in their lives, because she had always been there. But while she felt a sense of responsibility towards her mother, she didn’t have much feelings of any kind towards her grand-mother. “I am sorry,” she mumbled, “You are staying alone Mummy?”

There was silence at the other end. Then there was some sound and Paridhi realized that she was crying. “Mummy. Are you crying?”

“I never had any expectation from your brother. But you also never thought of checking up on me?”

“Mummy. You are the one who had disowned me,” Paridhi could not help retorting.

“I was angry.”

“Of course. So was I. But I called you Mummy, didn’t I? I will keep calling. Okay? Don’t cry now. Please.”

“Yeah. I am fine.”

“And Mummy?”

“Yeah?”

“Would you like to get back in touch with Bhaiya?”

“You know where he is.”

“Yes. We are in touch. Shall I give you his number?”

“I am his mother. You want me to bow down?”

“Right. No. I don’t want to,” Paridhi sighed. Parents are supposed to love their kids come what may. At least that’s what the entire world seems to believe. But that was not true. Ego, rivalry and all sorts of conflict came in the way of parental love too. “I will call again, Mummy. Bye.”

“Everything all right?” Subrato held her hands gently and asked.

“Dadi is dead.”

“I am sorry,” the response came automatically.

“I’m not sure I’m. How insensitive is that? We are a family, right? We are supposed to love each other. And yet… I must be a terrible person to feel this way about my family…”

“Stop it Paridhi.”

“My mother is alone. She has given birth to me. She has brought me up. How will she manage alone in her old days? I should do something about her. And yet… I… I just don’t feel like going back, meeting her, bringing her here, living with her – any of that. Because… Because she makes me miserable. Even today… But she is my mother. I should feel responsible towards her. Our parents have a right over us. Why? Because they have given birth to us. But it was not my decision that I should be born, was it? Then why should I be responsible for it? Why should I feel indebted that they gave birth to me?”

“Paridhi!” Subrato had to shake her to stop her agitated ramblings.

“Your family is not like that, right?”

Subrato sighed, “No. It’s not. They are more reasonable. But…”

“Nobody’s is. Why me? When families are perfect for every body else, why not me?”

“Tell me something Paridhi. How many people know about your problems with your family?”

“Only… you…” she was confused by his question.

“So, nobody else who looks at your can figure out what you go through in trying to please your family, can they? What makes you think that the same thing doesn’t happen to others.”

She fell silent.

“For some reason, we have idealized, romanticized a lot of things. Haven’t people been talking since forever about pure love, unconditional love and what not about couples? How much of that pure, unconditional, lasting-till-death love do you see around? Parental love is also not as perfect as we would like to believe. Parenthood is probably a special feeling, and it does seem to make some people better. But that’s not a given… And if it didn’t make you mother a better, sensitive person, you are not responsible for it. Nor are you alone. This world is full of people with broken, abusive families. You are actually amongst the better lot because you have escaped unharmed and you are not dependent. You are quite lucky Paridhi, and you are not responsible. Always remember that.”

She broke down and leaned on him for support.

“And I am sorry,” he mumbled, “I shouldn’t have asked you to call her. It has disturbed you, instead of calming you down.”

“No. Don’t say that,” she stopped crying and looked up a him, “It makes me feel like a loser. Someone who has burdened you with her own troubles…”

“Stop this, will you?”

“Why do you even like me? I’m such a messed up person. Ever since we have met, all you seem to be doing is listening to or solving my problems. What do you see in me? What will you ever get from me?” all her insecurities were surfacing.

Subrato sighed, “I will tell you this once and for all Paridhi. And I don’t want you to ask this question ever again. Okay? Listen then. Behind all your troubles is this very unique quality of yours. That you care, care to a fault. Even if you want to turn apathetic, which I thought you had turned towards your family, you can not stop caring. I want that care from you. And I hope that from me you won’t get any troubles in return.”

Paridhi had nothing to say. She just hugged him tight in reply.

“What should I do about Mummy?” she asked a little later.

“You tell me. What do you think you should do?”

“I will ask Bhaiya to call her. I think she wants to connect back with him. But is too egoistic to take the first step.”

“Will he agree?”

“He will. She is his mother too… He did what he did because he had no other option. And he is in Mumbai, closer to her than I am… Plus he is the son. She would feel more comfortable depending on him…”

“Great then. What is there to worry about?” Subrato smiled, “And we can always make trips to India to visit her as well as my family. And tell your brother that you will share any financial responsibilities going forward.”

“I will. Though my guess is that she doesn’t need financial help. Papa has left enough. Remember the lakhs she was willing to spend on my dowry?”

Subrato chuckled to make light of the situation and hugged her gently.

—

Paridhi was perplexed. Subrato had asked her to help him in finalizing the house. And he was showing her the huge houses in the suburbs. When he had landed in New York, he had talked about renting an apartment in Manhattan. Why did he want to move so far into suburbs now? How will they meet? As it was, the thought of him shifting out to his own house was making her feel wretched. And to top that, it was going to be so far.

This was third house they were seeing and boy! Did she fall in love with it? It reminded her of some of the colonial constructions she had seen back in India. Only it was very suitable to the modern sensibilities. It was spacious with a lawn in the front. There was plenty of space for a kitchen garden in the backyard. They walked upstairs to the bedroom. Airy and sunny were the words that came to her mind. The place was almost fully furnished and the bed in the room was thing of beauty with its wooden carvings.

“This one is beautiful.”

“You like it?”

“I do. But do you?”

“All the houses I showed you are pre-selected for my liking. You have to decide.”

“Me? But you have to live here,” she said trying hard to suppress the disappointment in her voice.

“You… You are not going to… shift with me?”

She looked up startled, “Am I?”

“What the… Why on earth would I be looking to buy a house in the suburbs if not to…”

“You are buying the house?”

“Correction Ms. Chauhan. We are buying the house. What were you thinking?”

“How would I know? You never told me anything. When did you say our roommate arrangement was going to continue?”

“Our roommate arrangement is not going to continue.”

“Excuse me?”

“You are… I am sorry I should not have presumed,” he calmed down and spoke seriously, “I mean… I want you to move in with me… No. I want us to move in together. As live-in partners right now, if you insist on the correct technical term. But hopefully soon as husband and wife and life partners. Is that acceptable to you?”

“You are a wicked man! Couldn’t you have told me earlier? I was feeling so wretched…”

“You thought I would leave you behind… Oh my God. Paridhi. Wasn’t it obvious?”

“How would it be obvious? You had never tried to…” her voice drowned in embarrassment.

“Tried to?”

“Nothing.”

“Come on, now.”

She looked here and there and completed her sentence with a shrug trying to look nonchalant, when she was actually feeling extremely shy, “You never showed any inclination towards a live-in or whatever relationship… How would I…”

She remained silent for a couple of moment after that, not daring to look up at him and was taken by surprise when he moved close to her. “I should and could put an end to all your uncertainties right away,” his hoarse voice sent a shiver down her spine. He put his arms around her almost trembling form and led her to the bed.

She lied down silently, feeling the reaction and arousal of her body as he gently, but passionately kissed and nibbled at her neck and earlobes. She could also feel his growing arousal as he had pinned her down beneath himself and his body was pressed hard against hers. One of his hands was caressing her face, hair, neck and breasts, while with the other he pushed up the skirt she was wearing. He drew back for a second and she opened her eyes to look at him.

He noticed the look for surprise and bewilderment on her face, as he took out a packet of condoms from his pocket. He looked from the packet to her face and back in a moment of confusion and awkwardness. Then he sighed before explaining, “I have been thinking about it… for quite sometime… And I wanted to be… not be careless… But you always looked so nervous and child-like… I wasn’t sure you were ready for it… And I carried it in my pocket afraid that you would find it… And… today I am again not sure,” he noticed her expressions and kept the packet down on the bed intending to withdraw.

“This place… this bed… is not ours…” she said suddenly.

“Is that your only objection?” he stopped moving away and asked.

“Yes… No… I mean… Yes!” she finally had to say it. Could somebody’s sensitivity be frustrating? If the person was Subrato, it could be. Right then, she just wanted him to forget everything else and devour her! And here he was! Struggling with whether she was ready! He was right is assessing that she was incredibly nervous. But what he didn’t seem to realize was that with him, she was incredibly ready too!

“Let’s mark it then,” he was back to kissing her senseless, “I have already negotiated down the prices. This is as good as ours. Including the furniture… and the bed…”

He did pull back once more to use the protection and except for those few moments, Paridhi lost every sense of time and place. She didn’t realize how loud her moans of pleasure were until she saw Subrato grinning at her in the end. He planted a soothing kiss on her forehead and asked gently, “Are you okay?”

“Y… Yes,” she felt shy despite the obvious assurance in his kiss as she replied through her panting and sweating.

“I had totally underestimated you,” he sounded amused as he lied down beside her and pulled her close to himself.

“What do you mean?”

“You will know in the days to come… In this very bed! Now that I know I can push you…. Quite far!”

She gulped hard at his obvious reference to their sexual life about which he seemed to be making some grand plans. But she replied bravely, “First get the house. Right now they could sue us for trespassing.”

“Right away, my Lady,” he replied and picked up his phone to call the agent. His dream of making New York his home for rest of his life was going to come true after all!

– The End –