Rupali sat on the bed with her knees drawn close to her chin, her hands around them, and her head buried in them. Her sobs were quieter now, but she was still not calm.

“Rupali,” he called her name and touched her shoulder gently. That startled her so much that she let out a shriek.

“I am sorry… I am sorry…” Paritosh stepped back, “It’s just me. I am sorry, I scared you.”

She controlled her sobs and wiped her tears. Then she got down from the bed. “I am sorry. This… this mess is not yours to deal with. I should leave…”

“And how do you plan to deal with this mess?”

“I don’t know. But…”

“There are some pretty sickening things in the world Rupali. You are a doctor yourself and you know that. And I don’t mean physical sickness. Some things are so sickening that we might wonder how the world goes on despite them. And yet – the world does go on. Do you know why? Because there are good things in the world too. Sometimes they do not come to us on their own though. We have to stretch our hands out for them. We have to let them know that we want them. Do you understand what I am saying?”

“No. I don’t,” she tried to speak dryly, but her voice quivered giving away her emotional turmoil.

“Yes. You do. Stop running away from it. If you have suffered abuse, you need to talk. If the perpetrator is Rohan, his parents need to know… He needs to be punished…”

Rupali stiffened and then went rigid. Paritosh let the silence prevail there in the hope that it would force her to talk.

“I must leave,” she quashed his hope when she did speak finally.

“Are you scared of me too?”

“What? No!”

“And can you trust me when I say that I can never harm you?”

Rupali looked embarrassed. “Of course,” she said in a small voice.

“Then you have to stop running away from your problems, Rupali. Please.”

“I… I am so tired of even thinking about a solution that… How thankless did I sound when after depending on her all my life, I complained to her about her own son… And if she understood what I said, how would she be feeling now…”

“Whatever her son is, you have not made him that way… Someday or the other she has to face the reality…”

“It’s not fair Dr. Khanna… Why do I have to carry that bad news…”

“It’s not fair at all that you are the victim and you are the one who is feeling guilty. You are the victim. You understand that, don’t you?”

“He always tried to convince me that I wanted this… And that this was how it was supposed to be… He was so clever that I never had a reply… And yet… I always felt so…” she stopped.

“Scared?” he prompted.

“Dirty and ashamed…” her face twisted reflecting her mental agony.

“And that’s why you never told anyone?”

“I was scared too… He told me that if I spoke about it, I’d be thrown out of the house… And I knew that they were not my parents, but his… I was scared of being left alone… I was weak…”

“No. No. You were just young. It shouldn’t have happened…. It was just wrong that it happened to you…”

“I should have done something… But I could never make up my mind… And then…”

“Then?”

“When he announced that he… wanted to marry me… and everyone accepted… his behavior changed… He didn’t bother me like earlier.”

“But from what I have seen…”

“It… It wasn’t as bad as earlier…” she gulped hard and reddened in embarrassment.

Paritosh sighed. She had gotten so used to abuse that the little relief was enough for her to consider it a good situation to be in.

“I should have refused then, shouldn’t I? But… I was… First I was caught unawares… Then I was so relieved at him giving me some respite that… It felt too good… I sat back…”

“You were fine with marrying him…”

“I was relieved then… I wasn’t thinking about future…”

“And now?”

“I… I am terrified at the idea… But…”

“You didn’t know how to break the news to his parents? Well… you already have!”

“You think I did the right thing?”

“Will you take my advice?”

“If I can take any body’s… it will be you.”

“I want to ask, why?”

“They did more than what my parents could do for me… But they are not my parents… I am under their debt and… probably you understand that feeling.”

“I do. And I have told you earlier as well… You have to speak up. You have already done so… Just clarify and bring it all out in the open.”

“Will they believe me?”

“I don’t know. They sound like rational people. But it is their own son. So, they may not. However, now you don’t have to be scared of being thrown out. You are an adult, you can earn your livelihood, your grand-father has left enough for you to start your life afresh and you don’t have anything to feel guilty about. You have not done anything ungrateful towards your benefactors. But you couldn’t change what their son is. It’s not your fault.”

“You make it sound so easy…”

“Rupali,” he took a step towards her, but did not go too close. He would have liked to give her a tight hug to make her feel better, but after being told that she had suffered molestation since she was a child, that didn’t seem like an assuring thing to do. His voice was solemn, “I do not mean that your situation has been trivial all these years. I can’t even imagine how difficult life has been for you. When I make it sound easy today, it is meant for today only. In fact, I’m not saying that it is easy even today. In your situation… it is not. All I am saying is that it is doable today. So, do it.”

“Will you… come with me?” she asked with hesitation. She realized how confused her behaviour was around him. Sometimes she leaned on him, at other times she felt guilty about involving him. When Damyanti had come, she had asked him to stay, a while back she had told him that this mess was not his, and now again…she was asking him if he would come with her.

“I will,” he replied matter-of-factly.

How did he manage to bear her erratic behaviour with so much equanimity, she could not help wondering. But she did not say anything. Suddenly she noticed the time. “Oh God! I am late for the hospital… And so must be you…”

Paritosh chuckled, “You think you would not have received calls after calls, if that were the case. We are both off-duty today. I had informed the admin.”

“When?”

“Last night.”

“Oh!”

“If you are ready, we can go to Moitras’ place right away.”

“But… Rohan would be there.”

“Let me talk to them.”

—

To be continued