After a fitful sleep of few hours, he gave up by five in the morning. There would be no point in going to her for riyaaz that day. He went to the attached bathroom to wash up; then came out of his room to the strange sight of Piyali sleeping at his bedroom’s door. She was sprawled on the floor with her back resting against the wall.
“What the…” Mukundo was exasperated. He looked for Sonelal, his housekpeer.
“When did she come?” he tried not to shout to avoid waking her up.
“About an hour back. I was still sleeping.”
“Why didn’t you wake me up?”
“Didi won’t let me.”
“Then she should have waited in the guest room or living room…”
“I told her Dada, begged her to… She wouldn’t listen. She walked aimlessly around the house for a while and when I next saw her she was sleeping here. I didn’t know what to do.”
Mukundo shook his head in disbelief and went to her.
“Pihu. Get up Pihu. Sleep in a bed…”
She opened her eyes with difficulty. He helped her get up and put her to sleep in his own bed. Then he sent Sonelal to her house to inform Promila, before going back in the room.
—
He was sitting in a rocking chair sipping tea and reading newspaper when she woke up.
“Good morning,” she said in a small voice while rubbing her eyes.
“What is good about this morning, Piyali?”
He was angry! He wasn’t calling her Pihu. She gulped and stayed silent.
“Why did you come here at that unearthly hour?”
“I thought you wouldn’t come to me in the morning. That’s why…” she gave an explanation which would have been absurd, if it weren’t she who was giving it, and if it wasn’t Mukundo who was listening to it.
“Why should I have come? Were you in any position to even wake up, much less do riyaaz.”
“If I stopped singing, you would never come to me?”
He sighed, “I am very angry at your Piyali. And you can’t distract me from that. You were drunk last night.”
The memories and the mortification of last night returned to her.
“Do you understand,” he got up from the chair and stood close to her near the bed, “That you are not a little girl anymore. You are a grown woman and people can take advantage of you.”
“Are you listening to me?” he roared and she jerked in fear. This kind of anger from him was a first.
“Mukundo Babu…” she was incredulous.
“I feel like slapping you. Hard. But if Kaka doesn’t do it, what right do I have?” he was still thundering.
“I. Am. Sorry,” she said in a low, but clear voice.
It had an immediate effect on Mukundo. She didn’t apologize; not often. She must have gotten his point. His anger cooled off.
“Go home and apologize to Kaka.”
She nodded and got down from bed.
“Wash you face before leaving,” he reminded her.
She nodded like an obedient child and went to his bathroom.
He remembered something else just as she was leaving.
“Pihu!”
She turned to face him expecting to be admonished further.
“Last night you said something weird. You told Kaka to not leave you, to not… Why?”
Her face lost whatever colour there was left.
“Why Pihu?” he asked again, firmly, but gently.
“He. Has. Cancer.” She replied slowly, measuring her words, as if scared of uttering them.
Mukundo wasn’t as shocked as he should have been. Her knowing this could have been the only explanation of what she had said. “How do you know?” he asked in a concerned, soft voice.
“You knew?” she asked in return.
He didn’t reply.
“Of course, you did,” she said sadly, “That’s where you have been taking him recently, haven’t you? To see the doctor.”
“Who told you?”
“Nobody. I saw the report.”
How? She hardly stepped into her father’s room, except when needed. And the report was safely tucked away in the cupboard. But he did not ask. Interrogating her would not be a comfort to her.
Silent tears started falling from her eyes.
“Come here,” he mumbled as he drew her in his embrace, “Stop worrying. He is going to live for many, many years. And then, I am there for you, am I not? You have nothing to fear, Pihu. Nothing at all. Stop crying.”
She looked flushed as she withdrew from the hug.
“I will go home.”
“Shall I drop you?”
“No. I am fine.”
“Tell Promila that I will have breakfast there with you and Kaka. Okay?”
She nodded and left.
Mukundo noticed her ear-rings in the bathroom before leaving for her home. He put them in his kurta’s pocket with the intention of giving those back to her.
—
When Mukundo walked in, he noticed that Piyali had already taken a bath. She was sitting at the dining table wearing a light blue salwar-kameez, her long, washed hair wetting her back. She was serving something on three plates, presumably one each for herself, her father and Mukundo. He stared at her silently for a few moments. Things had changed. They had changed a lot. What he had told her that morning was true. She was a grown up woman now. And he had become acutely aware of that when she had turned to him dancing like that… He felt for her ear-rings in his pocket, meaning to take them out. Then he decided against it and kept them back. He took a deep breath before making his way near her.
“Shall I call Kaka?” he asked.
“Hmm,” she nodded without looking at him.
There was an awkward tension at the dining table as all of them picked at their food. Mukundo had already informed Mr. Banerjee that Piyali knew about his condition.
“Pihu,” Mr. Banerjee decided to break the ice.
“Don’t talk about last night Baba,” she preempted him.
“I am not scolding you, Shona…”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” there was an edge in her voice. Mukundo looked at her disappointedly. She felt his eyes on her and said in a subdued voice, “I am sorry. About everything.”
Mr. Banerjee sighed, “You need to get yourself together, child. You already know about my condition. What do you plan to do? Be a burden on Mukundo all your life?”
She looked up startled; then said slowly, “No. No. I won’t do that.”
—
Debendra Banerjee’s health deteriorated faster than Mukundo had expected. Piyali spent a lot of time by her bedside; still not talking much. When she was not around him, she was often in horrible mood, screaming at slightest of the problems, running out of the house for hours, and she had practically stopped attending college. When Mukundo sat with her, and tried to make her talk, she would cry for hours. She would even be calm around him, but he had his job and other work to manage as well.
“Where are you going?” she came to his house once to find his getting ready to step out.
“For some work. Do you need me?”
“For Hope Foundation’s work?” she asked about his NGO.
“Yes.”
“Where?”
He hesitated before answering, “Sonagachi.” It was the biggest red light district of the city.
“Take me with you.”
“No. Not there.”
She laughed, almost bitterly, “I couldn’t be at risk there, Mukundo Babu. With so many willing women…”
“Shut up,” he didn’t like how she talked. And it wasn’t the men frequenting that place that he was worried about. He was worried about her. What if it gave her ideas… He shivered at the thought… He hated not being able to trust her with her well-being. But what was the option? She came to him to seek peace. She let him see the best and worst of her.And yet – even he didn’t know the source of that self-destructive darkness within her, which engulfed all the brightness of her mind and heart.
“You work with women there. I can be helpful…”
“When you grow up to be a responsible woman, I will take you there. For now, if you want to help, come to the school tomorrow.”
She didn’t come to the school. She was not at home at all at that time.
He found her by Mr. Banerjee’s bed one morning. She was awake the entire night, as her bloodshot eyes revealed.
“What are you doing?” he had dragged her out, “You have to stay well.”
“He was in lot of pain.”
“You can’t relieve his pain by torturing yourself.”
“You are right, as usual,” she said and walked off to her room, hopefully to sleep. Although that meant she won’t go to college again that day.
—
To be continued
One thought on “A Lost Soul (Part 3)”
It is getting a bit sad and weird…I can feel the wave..