“Geet. Agar tumne mujhe galat samjha to ismein tumhari koi galti nahin thi. Tumne zindagi mein jitne dhokhe khaye hain, uske baad to koi bhi aisa karega Geet. Aur maine bhi to tumhari galatfahmi door karne ki koshish nahin ki. Tum please khud ko pareshaan karna band karo aur so jao jaa kar. Tumhein aaraam ki zaroorat hai.”

“Lekin…”

“Bas Geet,” he wanted to touch her and reassure her. But after he was reminded of his behaviour at the farm house that morning, he was unable to do that. He felt like he had lost the right!

Geet hadn’t noticed it till then, but when he stopped her from speaking further she saw him moving towards her and then withdrawing his hands consciously. She thought it was because he could not forgive her. He was being nice to her because she was ill. But he could not forgive her.

She said sadly, “Mujhe pata hai ki main maafi ke kaabil nahin hoon. Aur aap dil ke itne achche hain ki aap mujhe sazaa bhi nahin denge. Phir bhi ek baar maafi maangna chahti thi.” She turned around to leave.

She would leave. But she wouldn’t rest. Maan had to talk and that was not an easy thing for him to do. He was not prepared for this. But then he could not let her suffer because of that. He had to talk.

Geet stopped in her tracks as she heard Maan’s voice, “Mujhse maafi maang rahi ho Geet?” She turned back and faced him as he continued, “Mujhse? Jisne waada kiya tha tumhari har mushkil aasaan karne ka. Lekin jab tumhein taqleef hui, to tumhare man ki baat samajhne ki bajai tumhein aur taqleef de di. Jab tumhein sambhaal kar rakhna chahiye tha, tumhara khayaal rakhna chahiye tha, tab maine tumhari taqleefein aur badha di.”

“Lekin…”

“Geet. Main khud ki ummeedon par khara nahin utar saka. Shayad main tumhare liye sahi nahin hoon. Aur sahi ho bhi nahin sakta. Maan Singh Khurana – jiske bhai ki wajah se tumhare gujre hue kal ne tumhein itni taqleefein di hain, itne dard diye hain, ye soch kar hi mujhe apne naam se jude hue har rishte se nafrat hone lagi hai,” Maan’s guilt was evident on his face and eyes and so was Geet’s pain on hearing him pour out his insecurities and disappointments with himself.

Maan turned away from her as he continued, “Mujhe dar lag raha hai Geet ki agar main tumhari zindagi mein raha to tumhare aane waale har pal mein, tumhare guzre hue kal ka aaina ban kar tumhare saamne khada rahoonga. Tumhare ateet ke har dard, har taqleef ko tumhein yaad dilata rahoonga. Chahte hue bhi tumhein tumhare ateet ko bhulne nahin de paunga Geet. Aur main khud kabhi nahin bhool paunga ki maine use ghar se nikala tha, uski madad karne se mana kiya tha, aur isliye usne tumhare saath…”

Geet was stunned by this time. He turned back to face her, “Geet. Kya tum kabhi apne ateet ko bhula paogi? Kabhi mujhe maaf kar paogi?”

Geet was so taken aback that she could not say anything immediately. He looked at her for couple of seconds and then walked out. She saw him going to the terrace.

She sat down on the bed. She needed sometime to find her voice back. He had been torturing himself with so much of guilt. She was only concerned that he would be angry at her. But this anger at himself – she hadn’t thought about it even in her wildest nightmare.

—

Maan went to the terrace unable to bear Geet’s silence. It was full moon night. He remembered the evening when he had made her wear the engagement ring making the moon his witness. Was the same moon to witness the end of their relationship now?

‘Geet ne kuchh bhi nahin kaha jab maine usse poochha ki woh mujhe maaf kar payegi ya nahin. Kya use bhi yahi lagta hai ki main uske liye sahi nahin hoon?’ Maan thought to himself. He had decided to be brave. To go away from her life for her betterment. And yet, when he had poured his heart out to Geet, he had hoped that she would stop him. That she would say she had forgiven him. And that she did not hold him responsible for what Dev did. But she was silent. That was the end of his world. His world that revolved around Geet.

“Haan!” The voice ringed in his ears and he turned back to find Geet in front of him.

“Geet?”

“Mera jawaab haan hai. Aap jaanna chahte the na ki main apne ateet ko bhool paungi ya nahin? Haan – main bhool jaungi apne ateet ko. Mere liye mera ateet, meri nafrat, mera guzre hue kal ka dard, kuchh bhi aapse bada nahin hai. Agar mujhe aapka saath milega to main sab kuchh bhool jaungi. Lekin kya aap mera saath denge?”

Maan’s eyes had tears once again. But this time they were of happiness. He did not mind shedding those tears. Not in front of Geet. There was nothing he needed to hide from her. They moved forward and gave each other a bone crushing hug. It felt like getting cold, sweet water after spending several days in a dry desert. They just could not have enough of each other.

Maan was the one to break the hug first, “Geet. Ji to kar raha hai ki aaj tumhein kahin jaane na doon. Bas apne saath baitha kar raat bhar tumse baatein karta rahoon.”

“To kariye na,” Geet eyes were also moist with happiness as she looked up at him.

“Nahin Geet. Ab bilkul nahin. Tumhein aaraam ki zaroorat hai. Aur… ab to hamare paas poori zindagi hai. Hai na Geet?” He actually seemed to look for reassurance.

Geet nodded happily.

“Bas ek baat Geet.”

“Kya?”

“Tum bahut majboot ho. Aur tumhein meri madad ki koi zaroorat nahin hai. Lekin mujhe tumhari bahut zaroorat hai Geet. Main tumhare bina zinda nahin rah sakta. Mujhe phir kabhi chhod kar mat jaana Geet.”

“Maan. Shayad maine aapse itna to seekh liya hai ki main aapki madad ke bina zinda rah sakti hoon, khud ko paal sakti hoon. Lekin Maan. Saansein lena to kaafi nahin hai na. Main aapke bina zindagi nahin jee sakti. Aur na hi jeena chahti hoon.”

Overwhelmed they hugged each other again.

“Chalo Geet. Main tumhein kamre mein chhod doon. Tum aaraam se so jaana. Aur neend poori kiye bina mat uthna.”

—

To be continued