“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that,” Siddhartha was at least partly guilty as charged, and he knew it. But he didn’t think his confession would undo the offense. He decided to go the way of acknowledgement without confession and an unconditional apology, “More like, my brother is known to be a lady killer of sorts. But my question came out wrong and I apologize. You don’t love him, I suppose.” Later he would wonder why he was engaging in this chit-chat with her. Was he hoping to intervene on his brother’s behalf? Or was he grabbing on to a rare opportunity of getting to know her?

“I don’t know what love is,” Karishma replied, not wanting to hold onto the offense, and implicitly accepting his apology, “But I can’t depend on him.”

He smiled, “You don’t know what love is? Surely you love your daughter?”

She bit her lips, then said slowly, “I don’t know. But she should always be able to depend on me. And I will do whatever it takes to ensure that. Soumen, understandably, wants to do nothing with me now. But I need this job and I would do–”

“You have your job, Karishma. You can stop worrying about that.”

She inhaled sharply and Siddhartha could almost see tension easing out of her body.

“Thank you,” she was almost choking, “But Soumen?”

“Do you want to continue in the same role?”

“I will do whatever–”

“Whatever I ask you to do. I know that. But are you comfortable with it?”

“I didn’t believe even for a moment that he knew what he was saying. So, I have no difficulties in forgetting that he ever said anything like that.”

That was rather savage towards his brother’s feelings. But instead of feeling bad for Soumen, Siddhartha found himself appreciating Karishma’s clear-headedness.

“At least you don’t hate him.”

She smiled at that, “No. I don’t hate him. In fact, contrary to what I had expected in the beginning, I am quite fond of him. Just not– He is impulsive, young. He is like a younger brother to me.”

It was Siddhartha’s turn to be amused, “You seem to forget that he is the same age as you.”

Karishma flushed, “Of course. I– I am talking more than I should. I apologize.”

He laughed, then said, “I will talk to him. If he is stupid enough to not want you as his assistant, there isn’t any dearth of work in this company for someone who is willing to do it.”

She nodded and averted her eyes. Siddhartha surmised that she had tears in them. He shouldn’t detain her any longer. Because he was feeling a strong urge to hold her in his arms and reassure her that everything will be all right.

“You should take the day off today. You are overwhelmed. Those red eyes tell me you haven’t slept well and it has barely been a week since you recovered from viral. Let me talk to Soumen and we regroup tomorrow. Is that alright?”

She nodded and left with her daughter in tow. But going back home early was of no use. She decided to take Kirti on a day outing instead.

—

“Are you so heartbroken that you don’t intend to come back to work?” Siddhartha had cleared out his afternoon and had gone home hoping to catch his brother there. Soumen was standing in the balcony of his bedroom, looking out into the garden, his expressions blank, a few empty beer bottles strewn about the place and another half-filled one in his hand.

“You know?”

“Karishma was worried about her job. She came to see me.”

“That’s all she cares for. Her fu***ng job.”

“She needs it to take care of her child and to support herself. She should have married you just for money, Sonu. She didn’t. I think you should respect that. She is honest.”

“You are right. And you were also right that she is not my type. She is more your type.”

“What does that mean?” Siddhartha asked sharply.

“I am kidding, Dada. Just that she keeps worrying about things and feeling responsible for them just like you do.”

Siddhartha let out a sigh and came to the point that mattered to Karishma, “Do you have a problem in keeping her on as your assistant?”

“I hadn’t thought about that.”

And that was all Karishma had been thinking about, Siddhartha thought. He stayed silent to allow Soumen to make up his own mind.

“Well, you gave her the job.” Soumen said at last.

“I can give her another one. She has more than proven her worth. But she is good for you. So, I would like her to continue assisting you. But that will work only if you are going to be okay with it.”

“I will be okay, Dada. This entire episode was stupid. I am going to forget about this.”

“Good!”

—

But Soumen was not okay. Siddhartha couldn’t ignore his brother’s moroseness. And his absentmindedness at work. Karishma was, again, bearing disproportionate share of his work.

“How are things going with you?” he asked, finding her alone in the office one evening.

“With me?” she seemed confued by the question, “Everything is fine.”

“I meant with you and Soumen. Or rather between you.”

She gulped hard, “Everything is fine, really. A few things have been delayed, but I – we – are working on catching up. These marketing plans have to be reviewed–”

“Karishma!” he sounded tired, “Stop being so defensive all the time, please.”

She fell silent.

“Look Karishma. I have not come here to demand anything from you. Rather I have some responsibilities. And–” here his voice became dim, “I am asking for your help in discharging them.”

She felt concerned now, “What is bothering you so much?”

“First is this. Tell me very, very honestly, how is Soumen’s behavior towards you. Because if there is anything even slightly inappropriate, in the context of workplace that quickly becomes harassment. And–” What on earth was he doing? Karishma was too terrified of losing her job to think of something like that. Why would he give her ideas? The reason, he acknowledged, was that he had come to put immense trust in this woman. He could reveal his vulnerabilities to her without being taken advantage of.

“Sir,” she interrupted him, “Soumen has been nothing but cordial towards me. You do not have to worry about that. And I assure you that if there is ever a problem, I will come to you first. I won’t go about complaining of harassment. I know that I don’t need to.”

“Thank you,” he said. His trust in her was not misplaced. Now he could be even more vulnerable in front of her. “My second worry is what is going on with my brother. This is partly professional, but largely personal. It seems like he is not doing fine. And at least at work, you would know about it better than I would. So, once again, I need you to tell me honestly, how is he doing? Don’t defend him, if he isn’t doing alright. But if I am worrying unnecessarily, you can tell me that too.”

She looked at him for a long moment; then finally said, “He is not doing well. I’m sorry about this. I don’t know what to do to fix it. He is always nice to me, like I said. So, I have no complaints there. But he himself isn’t doing that well.”

Siddhartha nodded in understanding. His fears were confirmed. For a while they both sat in silence.

“Do you think,” she spoke finally, “that I shouldn’t continue in this role?”

“I don’t know if that is the right thing to do or if it would even help. Besides, I don’t want to impose that decision on him or you. If either of you tells me that that’s what should be done, I will do it. But I really don’t want that to be my decision. So, I am giving you an opportunity now, do you think that’s what should be done?”

“I am not the one suffering, Sir. It really should be Soumen’s decision. What I can assure you is that I won’t take it otherwise and if you give me some time and trust, I will find my footing in whatever other role you decide for me.”

He smiled slightly, “I am sure you will.” Then he stood up to leave, “Thank you, Karishma. I will speak to him and then see how it goes.” Sensing a sign on worry on her face, he added, “Don’t worry. I am not going to tell him that you complained.” She chuckled at that. He had hit the nail on the head. By now, she expected him to.

“Sir!” she stopped him when he was at the door.

“Yes?”

“You may already know this. He had planned a Europe trip with his friends a while back. But since then he had decided against going because of work. If you think it will help him to take a break, perhaps…”

“I knew but had forgotten about his plans. Thanks for reminding me. It may be the thing to do.”

—

To be continued