Towards the Oneness
Note on the OS
Immediately after their wedding Maan was unwilling to consummate their marriage, because it could have been dangerous for the baby according to the doctor. But he did not want to tell her that. In trying to keep her away from him, he ended up saying hurtful things to her and went off to Chandigarh for a day without telling her. Geet, meanwhile, came to know why Maan was keeping away from her and felt guilty about doubting his love. In the show they never showed Maan repenting his hurtful words. But he should have. This incident is supposed to happen after he comes back from Chandigarh.
—
He stopped at the their bedroom door when he saw her sitting on the bed with her hands around her folded knees. She was sitting in exactly the same posture in which she had waited for him on their Suhag Raat. The only difference was that instead of the excitement, nervousness and love, her face showed pain and tears.
Did his staying away end up giving her more pain? He had crossed the boundaries while shouting at her. Because he would rather have her be angry at him that be guilty about herself. And he had hoped that the pain of the anger will be less than the fear of losing the baby – the baby that meant the world to her, even before he came in to their world. If there was a chance that things would look all right after the tests, if there was a chance to protect her from that guilt and fear, he wanted to take it. But did he do it right? Looking at her face right now, he thought he went utterly wrong. He went to the extent of hurting her self-respect. That was so unnecessary.
What was he to do now? He did not know how to face her. Probably he should stay away for couple of hours, until he had the time to consult the doctor. Once he knew the situation, he would make it up to her. If all was well, he would have succeeded in keeping her away from the guilt at least. And he would make sure that the pain he gave her in the process goes away. If things were still complicated, he would have to break the news to her. But he would also make sure that she did not feel guilty about it. He would find a way to ensure that.
Yes – he would stay away. But before he could turn back, she had sensed him. There was that connection between them! They always knew when the other person was around.
She saw him, got down from the bed, ran to him and hugged him. He hugged her back as a natural reaction, even though he had no clue why she was behaving this way. But when they were in each other’s arms, for those moments, the questions became immaterial. He hugged her as tight as she was hugging him and the desires raised their faces again in both their bodies. The caresses on their backs became rougher and more urgent, their breathings became shallow and they clutched each other so tight as if they just wanted to become one in the body – quite literally pushing themselves into one another.
Maan was the one who came to his senses first. He had to go away. He will end up doing a blunder if he stayed close to her.
He stepped away, tried to put on his Maan-Singh-Khurana expression and said as non-chalantly as he could manage, “Geet mujhe ek important meeting ke liye bahar jaana hai.” He turned away pretending to look for something.
She looked at him with tear-filled eyes. He was still putting up an act. But now she knew just how much he was hurting inside.
“Maan. Aapko meeting ke liye jaane ki zaroorat nahin hai. Maine woh meeting pahle hi attend kar li hai,” she said. She picked up a file from the bed and extended her hand towards him to give him the file.
Maan looked back in surprise, “Kaun si meeting ki baat kar rahi ho Geet?”
She just indicated towards the file in her hands.
Still perplexed, he took the file from her and realized by looking at the cover that those were her medical reports. He panicked and instead of reading the reports he started questioning her nervously, “Geet. Ye tumhare paas kaise aayi? Doctor ne tumhein… Tum theek to ho na Geet. Tum tension mat lena…”
“Bas Maan. Ab na to aapko mujhse gussa hone ka natak karne ki zaroorat hai, na hi apne aap ko itni taqleef dene ki zaroorat hai. I am sorry Maan. Please mujhe maaf kar dijiye. Aap meri hifaazat ke liye mujhse door ja rahe the aur maine bina soche, bina kuchh jane aapko kya-kya kah diya.”
Knowing that the wall of misunderstanding has broken, he could no longer hide his concern. He dropped the file on the bed and hugged her tight, “Geet! Tum theek to ho na. I am sorry Geet. Maine tumhein ek stress se bachana ke liye doosra itna bada stress de diya. Tumse door rahne ki koshish mein tumhein kuchh bhi bol diya Geet. Tum mujhe maaf kar dogi na? Kal raat ko bola hua mera ek bhi lafz sach nahin tha. Main aisa nahin sochta tumhare baare mein, soch hi nahin sakta.”
Neither of them tried to break the embrace as they talked. Geet replied, “Maan! Aapko maafi maangne ki koi zaroorat nahin hai. Main to jaanti hoon na ki aap mujhse kitna pyaar karte hain. Aapke pyaar ke oopar shak karna meri galti thi. Bas babaji se yahi maangti hoon ki mujhse aisi galti dubara na ho.”
“Geet. Aisa mat sochna. Ismein tumhari koi galti nahin thi. Jaise halaat maine bana diye the, usmein gussa aana to normal tha.”
He broke the hug and cupped her teary face in his hands. He wiped her tears with his thumbs, “Geet. Ab tumhein sab pata hai. Waada karo Geet ki kissi bhi baat ke liye na to tum khud ko doshi thahraogi, na hi tum koi chinta karogi. Waada karo Geet. Tumari aur hamare baby ki sehat ke liye ye bahut zaroori hai.”
“Aap kis mitti ke bane hain Maan? Aapko apni khwahishon ki koi parwah nahin hai. Kuchh bhi bardasht kar sakte hain aap apne oopar. Koi shikayat nahin hai ki shaadi ke baad bhi…” She did not complete her sentence, but the look of embarrassment and guilt on her face clearly told Maan what she was thinking.
“Geet. Kash main itna majboot hota jitne ka tum mujhe credit de rahi ho, to phir maine tumhein itni chot nahin pahunchayi hoti. Sach to ye hai Geet ki main halaat ko sambhaal hi nahin paya, apni kamzori ki wajah se. Tumse itni obviously door rahna nahin chahiye tha mujhe, na hi mera aisa koi iraada tha. Lekin jab tum kareeb hoti ho to main bahut kamzor pad jaata hoon. Khud ko rokna namumkin ho jaata hai mere liye. Aur isliye… Aur in sab ke beech main tumhein itni kadwi baatein kah gaya ki tumahre swabhimaan ko chot pahuncha di. Phir bhi tum mujhpar gussa nahin ho. Mujhe to ye batao Geet ki tum kis mitti ki bani ho? Tum apni chhoti si galti – chahe woh meri nazar mein galti ho bhi na – uske liye maafi maangne pahle chali aati ho. Meri galti chahe kitni bhi badi ho, mujhe maafi maangne ka bhi mauka nahin deti ho. Koi shikayat, koi gussa nahin rakhti man mein.”
“Maan. Jab tak aap mere saath hain, mujhe aapse to kya, kissi se bhi koi shikayat nahin hai. Us zindagi se bhi nahin, jisne mujhe bahut dhokhe diye. Kyonki usi ne aapko bhi to mere paas bheja.”
“Thank you Geet. Chahe main kitna bhi bada dusht-danav ban jaun, tum mujhe kabhi mere baare mein bura mahsoos nahin hone deti ho.”
“Kya karoon Maan, ye dusht-danav hi to mujhe pariyon ki duniya ki rajkumari bana kar, paristaan mein le aaya hai na. Usse kaise naraaz rahoon?”
They both smiled.
But Maan realized immediately that he did not yet know what her reports said. He became concerned again and picked up the file, “Geet. Tumhari reports mein kya hai?” He started leafing through the file to see for himself, as Geet answered, “Ab koi khatra nahin hai Maan.”
His eyes lit up and his facial muscles relaxed as he heard this and also confirmed it with the reports. But he wanted to be absolutely sure. He wouldn’t trust his own interpretation of the reports.
“Geet. Main doctor se mil kar aata hoon. Poori tasalli ho jayegi.”
“Par…” she started saying that she had already met the doctor, but realized that he would not be satisfied until he has checked it with the doctor himself. So, instead of stopping him from visiting the doctor, she asked to accompany him.
“Main bhi chalti hoon.”
“Nahin Geet. Tum aaraam karogi. Waise bhi Annie ke accident ki wajah se tumhein kaafi bhaag daud karni padi hai. Abhi aur nahin.”
Geet gave up. If this is what will give him peace, let it be. She could manage to be away from him for couple of hours. After all, now she knew that he wasn’t going away from her.
Maan wanted to meet the doctor alone. Somehow he did not trust Geet this one time. What if she had pressured the doctor to tone down the reports for the sake of his happiness. He did not realize that he was suspecting Geet of scheming to a level that this simple, straight forward girl was inherently incapable of. But he was so paranoid about her situation that he trusted no one, not even Geet herself. He couldn’t help it.
—
“Maan, kahan hain aap?” It had been over four hours since Maan left to see the doctor and she was getting restless.
“Office mein, aur kahan rahunga is samay? Aur tum office kyon nahin aayi? Kitna saara kaam hai yahan par. Shaadi ho gai to kya pati ke paison par hi aish karne ka irada hai,” Maan pulled her legs.
Her mouth literally opened in surprise. What had come upon him? A few hours back, he wouldn’t even have her go to the doctor. And now he is taunting her for not coming to the office.
‘Abhi batati hoon,’ she thought to herself.
She entered his cabin full of her cute irritation. But Maan was talking to several employees about a project proposal. She could not help notice that he was being very patient with people asking questions and did not even shout at Tasha for some silly remark of hers. Although he acted the boss with his usual authority, Geet could not help notice the brightness in his eyes and relaxation in his manners. He was clearly happy. Must be the effect of doctor’s reassurance, she thought. Seeing him happy she forgot all her irritation.
Maan assigned quite a bit of work to her too. She left his cabin with others and started working on her tasks. It was already late afternoon when she had come to the office. Soon everyone had left for the day. Geet didn’t realize it until she saw Maan in her cabin staring at her.
She startled on noticing him, “Aap? Yahan kya kar rahe hain?”
“Kyon? Main apni biwi ko dekh nahin sakta?” He said teasingly and moved towards her.
“Mr. Khurana. Ye aapka ghar nahin office hai. Main aapki biwi nahin, secretary hoon,” Geet also played along.
“Koi baat nahin. Main apni secretary ke saath hi thoda romance kar leta hoon,” he had come very close to her and they were staring into each other’s eyes. She was so lost in him that she did not notice him keeping a rather large packet on the table.
“Aapki biwi naraaz ho jayegi.”
“Woh kuchh nahin kahegi,” he grabbed her at her waist and pulled her closer. She gasped. Their lips were very close.
Geet became nervous, “Maan – hum office mein hain.”
“Yahan koi nahin hai. Aur aaj hum ghar ja bhi nahin rahe hain.”
“Matlab?”
He turned his attention to the packet on the table. That’s when she noticed the packet. He opened the packet and took out a beautiful one piece, ankle length, white dress. It flared slightly around the waist. It was enhanced with white laces, without using too much of them, giving it a classy, sober look.
Geet smiled when she looked at the dress, “Mere liye hai?”
“Nahin. Meri biwi ke liye.”
Her smile got bigger and she tried to take the dress from him, “To aapki biwi abhi change kar ke aati hai.”
But he did not let her take the dress and pulled her towards him.
“Aaj apni biwi ko main apne haathon se taiyaar karoonga.”
She became nervous again, “Maan!”
“Chup, bilkul chup Geet,” he placed his hands on her lips.
He slipped the dress over her head so that the flares covered her upper body. Keeping his hands under the dress, he untied the dori of her kurti and unzipped it. Then he slipped it off her shoulders and pulled it down until it came to her waist. At that point he untied the dori of her salwar too and pulled both the pieces of her dress down temporarily exposing her legs. He then adjusted her hands in the dress and pulled it down in place. She hadn’t realized that the zip had the back of her dress was open until he embraced her to take his hands at her back and zipped the dress up.
She had her eyes closed during the entire process. She let the reaction of her body to the most sensual dress up ever take over her mind. Finally she opened her eyes when she felt his hands off her body. She noticed that the dress had very thin straps leaving her shoulders practically bare. She panicked a bit. It was fine in front of him, but he did not expect her to go out like this, did he?
‘Babaji!’ she prayed silently.
As if Babaji heard her prayer she saw him take out a small full sleeve jacket matching her dress from the packet. He went behind her and made her wear the jacket. She felt relieved. Maan noticed this and smiled slightly, which she could not see.
Still standing behind her, he reached out to take something out from the packet. She could not see what it was, until he kept it on the table. He proceeded to take off her ear-rings and replaced them with the diamond ones he had brought. They matched her dress perfectly. There was also a matching necklace that he put on her, in the process intentionally rubbing her ears, neck and nape. She was finding it hard to keep steady by now. He was driving her crazy. As if he realized this, he made her sit on her chair and placed her hands on the chair’s arms. Then he slowly took off her bangles and replaced them with a set from the packet, once again they matched her dress.
He kneeled and started taking off her sandles which embarrassed Geet a bit, “Ye aap kya kar rahe hain?”
“Ek shabd nahin Geet. Aaj sab kuchh mere tareeke se hoga,” he said without even looking up at her. He was concentrating on her feet. Once he took off her sandles, he massaged her feet lightly. She again decided to give in to the sensations generated in her body by his touches. She closed her eyes and leaned back on the chair. He made her wear a new pair of sandles studded with white stones.
He then made her stand up and opened her ponytail to let her hair loose.
He held her at the shoulders and asked, “Kaisi lagi dress Geet?”
“Ye to aap bataiye ki main kaisi lag rahi hoon ismein.”
“Bilkul meri pari jaisi,” Maan smiled indulgently.
Geet blushed deeply. He took her hands in his and they moved towards the door.
Geet asked once they were in the car, “Hum kahan ja rahe hain Maan?”
Maan smiled at her, but did not reply. She realized that he wanted to surprise her and decided to wait for it.
“Geet. Mujhe aise dekhti rahogi to main traffic par dhyaan nahin de paunga. Gadbad ho jayegi,” Maan’s voice brought her out of her reverie. She realized that she had been staring at Maan for last fifteen minutes or so for which they were driving. She blushed and leaned back on her seat. She closed her eyes as she felt herself soaking happiness from all around her. Happiness in being with her man, her Maan.
She looked forward to the night with excitement and nervousness.
—
The car stopped and they got out. Geet was engrossed in her thoughts and did not notice the surroundings. She went to Maan.
“Maan! Mujhe aapse kuchh kahna hai. Nahin… kuchh maangna hai.”
“Geet! Tumhein mujhse kuchh maangne ki kya zaroorat hai? Agar woh cheez mere paas hai to le lo. Agar nahin hai to bata do – aa jayegi,” Maan smiled lovingly.
“Agar koi cheez hoti to aisa hi karti, lekin mujhe koi cheez nahin, aapki zindagi ka ek hissa chahiye.”
“Meri to zindagi hi tum ho Geet. Lekin phir bhi… bolo tumehin kya chahiye.”
“Aapki jeevan-saathi hone ka haq.”
Maan was surprised and worried, “Ye kya bol rahi ho Geet? Ye haq tumhein maangne ki kya zaroorat hai? Ye to tumhara hai hi. Humne shaadi ki hai Geet. Kya tum abhi bhi meri kal ki baaton se…”
“Nahin Maan. Aisa nahin hai. Aur mujhe hamare shaadi aur pyaar ke rishte par bhi poora bharosa hai. Lekin mujhe kabhi kabhi lagta hai ki kahin maine aapki zindagi mein bas ek khoobsoorat si gudiya na ban ke rah jaun. Jise dekh-dekh kar aap khush to ho sakte hain, lekin jiske saath aap apni zindagi baant nahin sakte, sukh-dukh nahin baant sakte.”
Maan’s face showed immense pain as he asked, “Aisa kyon kah rahi ho Geet?”
“Maan. Mujhe pata hai ki aap mujhse bahut pyaar karte hain. Aap hamesha meri hifaazat karna chahte hain, mujhe khush rakhna chahte hain. Aur isliye aap apni pareshaaniyan mujhe kabhi nahin batate. Akele ladte rahte hain, tadapte rahte hain. Jaisa ki aap shaadi ke baad se kar rahe the. Ye to sahi nahin hai na? Mujhe haq hai aapki pareshaaniyon ke baare mein jaanne ka, unse aapke saath ladne ka. Khud ko pareshaan rakh kar aap mujhe khush nahin rakh sakte Maan. Jaise mere sukh-dukh se aapko farq padta hai, waise hi aapki khushiyon aur pareshaaniyon se bhi mujhe bahut farq padta hai. Aur main itni kamzor nahin hoon Maan. Aap hi ne mujhe majboot banna sikhaya hai aur main aapke saath saari mushkilon se lad sakti hoon.”
Maan was looking at her with an expression which was a mix of love, adoration, regret and pain, “I am sorry Geet. Jaane-anjaane mein maine tumhein khush rakhne ki jagah dukh pahunchaye hain. Shayad mujhe akele jeene ki itni aadat ho gai thi ki… Lekin ab nahin Geet. Sirf is baar ke liye mujhe maaf kar do. Aage se aisa nahin hoga.”
“Maafi mat maangiye Maan, please. Mujhe pata hai aap jo bhi karte hain meri khushi ke liye hi karte hain. Bas ye batana chah rahi thi ki meri khushi aapke saath rahne mein hai. Chahe sukh ho ya dukh.”
They both smiled. She leaned on to him and he held her in his arms.
They separated after a few seconds and Maan asked, “Chalein?”
She nodded and for the first time looked around. What she saw surprised her. A jungle! After all the dress up, she wasn’t expecting to land in a jungle for their night together.
‘Babaji! Inko thodi akal dijiye. Inhein junglon mein janwaron aur machchharon ke beech rahna achchha lagta hoga. Ye mujhe yahan kyon le aaye hain – woh bhi aaj ki raat?’ she thought to herself and complained to her Babaji.
She wasn’t speaking aloud, but her face showed some funny expressions without her realizing this.
“Kya hua Geet?”
“Nahin, kuchh nahin.” Geet forced a smile.
Maan, though, had been able to guess what she was thinking and he suppressed a chuckle.
After walking for a few meters, they came near a tent. The fire was burning and there was a small pond nearby. But he did not stop outside. Instead he put his arms around her shoulder and led her inside the tent.
Geet literally took a step back in surprise as she entered the tent. Then she moved around to examine the interiors while Maan looked at her with an amused and loving expression, his arms folded across his chest.
The inside of the tent was furnished in a way that was nothing less than a room in a five star hotel. Apart from being well decorated and well-lit, it had a king size comfortable bed and a small coffee table with two chairs, food was waiting for them on the table.
She turned back to see a smiling Maan.
“Maan! Aap intni taiyaariyon ke saath camping karte hain aur uske liye itni deengein haankte hain?” she was genuine in her question.
“Kya?” Maan’s smile vanished and he looked stupid for a moment. The he recovered, “Geet tum pagal to nahin ho gai ho. Of course, main aise camping nahin karta hoon. Ye sab maine tumhare liye arrange karwaya hai.”
“Oh!” It was Geet’s turn to look stupid and they just stood at their places for a few second without knowing how to proceed.
Finally Maan broke into a slight laughter and came towards her.
Geet spoke first, “I am sorry. Main chaunk gayi thi. Aapne itna achchha arrangement kiya aur main aapka mazaak uda rahi thi.”
“Geet. Bahut bholi ho tum. Aur isi bholepan ne to mujhe pagal bana diya hai.”
Geet blushed as he cupped her face and planted a kiss on her forehead, “Apni maasoomiyat mat khona Geet, chahe zindagi mein kaisi bhi pareshaaniyan kyon na aaye.”
Geet did not say anything, just hugged him.
“Khana kha lein Geet.”
“Haan mujhe to bahut bhookh lagi hai.”
As they sat down to eat, Maan could not concentrate on eating at all. He looked at Geet and if he hadn’t controlled himself hard, reminding himself that she must eat in time, he would have pounced on her immediately. For how long had he desired her! Since the night at the dhaba? When looking at her drenched in the rain, happy in a moment and sad the next, he had been unable to resist hugging her tight and had willed the time to stop right then. Or probably since much before that. since the first time he had seen her? When she had tried to heal his wound in their first meeting, on the pretext of which he had left her stranded! What if something bad happened to her then. No – he shuddered to think of those possibilities now. He had desired her when he had seen her in the white dress, looking so serene and innocently beautiful, to accompany him to Amritsar, when he had saved her from the speeding vehicle in Amritsar – she was distraught. He had pretended to not care, but she affected him. Affected him so much that he had tried to find peace in the Golden Temple. Even though he was not a believer. He even found an alibi to go to her house to inquire after her and his heart had skipped a beat on being told that she had not come back. He was not at peace until he had seen for himself that she was in her house – safe. He had been desiring her all the time, without consciously knowing it. His thoughts kept going back to her – practically a stranger then – but probably bound to him by a bond much stronger than that of an acquaintance or any social relations. He had desired her when he had saved her from being killed by Brij and his goons, when she had clung to him fearing for her life, when she had walked away from him instead of going to the police station as he had suggested. He had pretended to be disgusted with her weakness, but that, too, was only a way to avoid acknowledging his desires. And all those days she was in his office as strictly his secretary, goofing things up and then innocently asking for forgiveness, daring to give it back to him – the Maan Singh Khurana – if he made a mistake, taking his sorry to be a part of the dictation, tripping and falling, fumbling with her dupatta, falling asleep on her chair, muttering angry-nothings at him under her breath, driving him crazy with her innocent charm, with her simplicity, with her extra-ordinary ordinariness, with her ability to laugh even in trouble, with her liveliness, with herself. When he had seen her in a saree for the first time, when he had saved her from the mishap in the party, when he had seen her in her red lehnga getting ready for a party she had so painstakingly organized and which he had trashed and in his confused state of mind – not knowing whether to go close to her or to go away from her – had fired her and she had indeed left! Left him. When he had felt like his soul was being taken away from him. When, if he had not let his ego take an upper hand, he would have gone after her receding figure, held her hand, pulled her close to him and would have told her that she couldn’t go away from him!
What was he thinking? Geet was saying something, urging him to eat. She was praising the food. Maan was hardly able to register anything. He was seeing her lips – full and inviting! Let her eat, he told himself. He smiled and nodded at whatever she was saying without registering much. In trying to control himself in present, his mind again took solace in past. What had caused this uncotrllable urge he was feeling today. It was the wait of months! Control he had exercised all those days and the last few days – since their wedding! What had happened after the party? The party which had been so successful despite his misgivings, thanks to her. He had seen her blood in her cabin, he had rushed to her home but she had not trusted his intentions. She had thought he wanted to hurt her. It had torn his heart. But why was he remembering all this now? She trusted him blindly now. Geet had finished eating. She had washed her hands. She was happy about something. She was talking endlessly. How different it was from all those days when she wanted to run away from him, when she would not admit her feelings to him, when he had to force her to be his fake-fiancee just to keep her near him and had felt the brunt everytime she reminded him of the fakeness of their relationship. Through all of that – he had desired her and finally the day was here, when he would make her his own – in one final sense of the word – physically.
The force of his passion made him worry for a moment. Would he end up hurting her? But he let go. Now, nothing could go wrong between them. They were over all the obstacles, all the misgivings. It was their time to do what they wanted to.
Geet was still blabbering on and on about something. He loved that, but right now there was no space for words between them. He went up to her, stood behind her and put his hands on her lips, startling her and shutting her up. He hands slipped down from her lips and caressed her chin and neck.
His caresses were rough and intense. It was new to Geet, who was used to his soft, caring touches. She was still getting used to it, when he turned her around – once again with a force that she had not felt before. She looked into his eyes and what she saw there scared her for the moment. It was not her loving, caring husband. Those eyes were oozing wild passion and desire – almost animalistic. They threatened to engulf her. But she wasn’t scared for long. She understood his desire and felt happy about it. To be desired so furiously by the man she almost worshipped was the best complement the woman in her could get. He wanted to possess her, devour her and she felt happy, content and proud. She gave in to his passion. She turned into his wax doll, whom he could mould as he wanted. She felt him grabbing her hair and pulling her head backwards. He was still rough, but he was not hurting her. He never could. Protecting her was his basic instinct. It didn’t matter how engrossed he was in his desires, he would not hurt her. She complied to his push and felt his urgent kissed on her neck. He tried to access her shoulder and her jacket came in between. He pushed it off her shoulders but did not bother to take it off completely. Her hands were stuck in the jacket and she could not move them forward. As he kissed and nibbled at her shoulders, she went weak in her knees – literally – and was about to lose her balance. Due to the jacket she could not even hold him, but he immediately supported her at the waist without interrupting himself. He was driving her crazy and she really wanted to touch and hold him. But her hands were helpless. Did he do it on purpose? She wondered. Someday she would get back at him and drive him as crazy. But today he wanted his way. And she will give in to his ways. She felt him lifting her up. He made her sit on the bed and relieved her of her jacket. His movements were still jerky and urgent and they would remain so until he had had her for himself. She could not resist her temptation to hug him. He let her do that and hugged her back. Even his hug was different today. It was not a caring lover’s hug that he would usually give her. It was the hug of her wild lover. She still melted in his hug. She loved him in all his avatars. The khadoos boss, the caring guardian, the impatient teacher, the loving husband and now the wild lover. She loved this too. She let herself drown in the currents he was bringing. He pushed her down on the bed and pinned her as he slipped beside her and pulled the cover over them. She felt like she was floating in a sea of pleasure and contentment as he claimed each inch of her body. Even in that state should could not help but notice that he was taking care to not press her stomach to save the baby from any harm, irrepective of how wild he was being otherwise. Basic instinct, she thought to herself again and the tears of happiness flowed from her eyes.
—
After they were both spent, he felt like he was coming out of trance; as if he was in some other world – just him and his Geet and everything else around them had disappeared. Now he noticed everything and saw Geet lying beside him in his arms, looking at him, smiling through her tears. He pulled her close to him and wiped her tears.
“Geet,” he said in the softest possible, loving voice, “Ye aansoo?”
“Khushi ke hain,” Geet replied quickly to reassure him.
Maan smiled and pulled her even closer. But now he was slowly realizing how wild he had been. The concern he had pushed under the carpet came back in full force. He wanted to ask her if she was fine, but he hesitated. Would it sound odd?
Geet noticed the change in his expression. He looked worried.
“Kya hua Maan?”
“Nahin, kuchh nahin Geet. Woh bas…” He paused.
“Maan – aapne thodi der pahle mujhse waada kiya tha ki sab kuchh share karenge mere saath. Aur ab phir?” Geet reminded him gently.
“Haan Geet. Ye poochhna tha… ki… tum theek ho na… Main… Kuchh zyada to nahin ho gaya? Tumhein koi problem to nahin hui?” he managed to ask, looking very uncomfortable.
“Maan! Main bilkul theek hoon. Aapko pata na ho to main bata doon ki aap galti se bhi mujhe chot nahin pahuncha sakte.”
He was visibly relieved.
Happy and content, they chatted away for a while. Rather Geet talked and Maan fondly listened to her, until they had drifted away to sleep in each other’s arms, in the middle of a jungle, away from the noises of the world.
A Night of Togetherness
“Dadi Ma, Geet thak gayi hai aur use phir se chakkar bhi aa rahe hain. To use aaraam karna chahiye,” Maan told Dadi Ma as soon as the formalities of grih-pravesh after their wedding were over.
“Haan, haan bete, hamein…”
Maan didn’t even wait to hear Dadi Ma’s reply and picked Geet up in his arms. Dadi Ma cut short her sentence and gave a broad, naughty smile. Everyone else tried hard to suppress their giggles.
Geet was highly embarrassed, “Maan aap kya kar rahe hain? Main bilkul theek hoon. Sab ke saamne…”
But the look in his eyes told her that he was not going to care for anything or listen to anyone. Her voice drowned, as the possessiveness evident in those eyes and his body language became clear to her.
As they entered her room, Geet was lost in him. He was the first to notice the decorated room and his expression changed to that of surprise. This brought Geet out of her reverie. She also noticed the room and bed and blushed heavily.
Maan settled her on the bed and himself sat on the edge of the bed close to her.
“Maan! Ye aap kya kar rahe hain?”
“Kya kar raha hoon?” Maan made an innocent face.
“Aise sab ke saamne mujhe utha kar laane ki kya zaroorat thi?”
“Ye kya baat hui Geet? Maine to wahi kiya to jo tumne kaha tha.”
“Maine? Maine kya kaha?” Geet was surprised as well as irritated.
Maan leaned closer to her, “Achchha! Tumne nahin kaha tha ki main shaadi jaldi karwaun. Tumhein jaldi se Mrs. Maan Singh Khurana banna hai.”
Geet was exasperated, “Lekin Maan…”
Maan shut her up with his hands, “Chup. Bilkul chup Geet. Ab to mujhe legally permission mil gayi hai – tumhein har pal apne saath rakhne ki. Ab na to tumahre koi kayde chalenge, na hi duniya ki koi rok-tok. Samjhi tum?”
More than his words, his penetrating eyes had shut her up. She could not meet them any longer and started looking down shyly. He came closer to her and took off the dupatta from her head. She immediately closed her eyes.
Maan smiled slightly as he saw her closing her eyes. He then took off her maang-teeka and ran her finger over the sindoor he had placed a while back in the mandap. Geet realized this. She opened her eyes and placed her hand on top of his and held it there for a while. Both of them captured the moment. It reassured them that they finally belonged to each other – not only in their souls, but also in the eyes of the world. Nothing could come in between them now.
Geet brought her hands down and Maan’s slipped down caressing her forhead and cheeks.
“Meri taraf dekho Geet,” Maan lifted her chin and made her look into his eyes.
“Geet – hum dono ne is din ka bahut intezaar kiya hai, hai na?”
Geet gave a shy, nervous smile as she nodded and downcast her eyes again.
“Aur Geet. Hum apne rishte ko aage le jaane ke liye thoda aur intezaar karenge. Abhi tumhein aaraam ki bahut zaroorat hai.”
Geet was surprised on hearing this and became sad as she realized that Maan was once again sarificing his happiness for her well-being. She felt so bad that she almost had tears in her eyes as she looked up, “Maan ek baar phir aap mere baare mein…”
“Geet. Dubara tumne kuchh aisa kaha ya socha to hamara jhagda ho jayega, samjhi tum? Aur aakhiri baar main tumhein samjha doon ki main sirf aur sirf apne baare mein soch raha hoon. Apni zindagi ke baare mein. Agar mujhe tumhara saath nahin mila to meri to zindagi hi khatm ho jayegi na Geet. To poori zindagi ke liye kuchh dinon ka intezaar kya badi baat hai?”
“Aap hamesha aisi baatein kar ke mujhe rula dete hain, aur phir kahenge ki rona mat kyonki main tumhari aakhon mein aasoon nahin dekh sakta,” Geet lifted her hands to wipe her tears, but Maan held her hands and stopped her.
“Kuchh cheezon ke liye hamein intezaar karna hai Geet. Lekin iska ye matlab nahin ki main tumhein itni aasaani se chhod doonga. Baaki ke saare haq tumhein mujhe dene honge Geet. Aur ye sirf iski shuruat hai,” Maan bent forward and kissed her to wipe her tears away. A chill ran down Geet’s spine and she closed her eyes again.
Maan next moved his hand behind her neck and took off her heavy necklaces one by one. He left the Mangalsutra in its place and just ran his fingers over it. Another reminder of their togetherness for life.
He proceeded to take off her payal and other ornaments. His touch was affecting her so much that she could hardly sit straight. She leaned on the headboard, eyes closed and let herself drown in her feelings. Maan was being a tease in the process and she was enjoying it.The last set of ornaments he paid attention to were her bangles. He took them off one by one. As he was pulling out the last one, Geet stopped him, “Saari choodiyan nahin Maan.”
Maan smiled, “Tum kuchh bhool rahi ho Geet!”
He took out the set of Kangans he had given to her earlier with the promise that he would make her wear those on their Suhag Raat.
Geet was surprised, “Ye aap kab laye? Main to outhouse se kuchh la hi nahin payi thi.”
“Waada kiya tha to nibhana to tha na Geet.”
Geet didn’t say anything; just kept looking at him with deep devotion and appreciation in her eyes as he put the kangans on her.
Once the ornaments were taken care of, he said, “Geet. Tum in kapdon mein so nahin paogi. Tumhein change karne ki zaroorat hai.”
“Par main to outhouse se apne kapde lekar nahin aayi.”
She had hardly completed her sentence when she noticed that Maan was opening the cup-board. She expected him to take out one of his shirts, but she was in for a surprise. He brought a pink silk night dress, which had a top and a wrap-around skirt.
“Aap…” she started saying but stopped her sentence midway. Then she smiled and continued, “Main kya kahoon. Jab aap Delhi mein barf plan kar sakte hain, to ye bhi kar hi sakte hain. Pata nahin aap itna sab kuchh soch kaise lete hain?”
“Geet, in palon ka intezaar karte-karte maine inke baare mein itni baar socha hai ki…”
Geet was floored again, “Maan. Agar har koi aapki tarah pyaar kar pata to duniya kitni alag hoti.”
“Agar kar kissi ko meri Mishti jaisi ladki mili hoti to har koi meri tarah pyaar karna seekh jaata, lekin Mishti to ek hi hai Duniya mein.”
“Aur aapki Mishti ke liye Maan bhi to ek hi hain na!” Geet was now comfortable in conversations and was not hesitating in pouring her heart out. Maan looked at her with smiling eyes.
They were lost in each other’s eyes for a few moments. Then Geet recovered and she got down from the bed with her night dress, “Main change kar ke aati hoon.” She started going towards the bathroom, when he pulled her back.
“Geet. Tum phir meri baat itni jaldi bhool gayin? Maine kaha tha na ki apne saare haq aaj se le loonga.”
Geet did not understand him, so looked at him with questioning eyes. She found his eyes devouring her with their seductive looks. As usual, she could not meet his eyes for long and started looking down.
Then she suddenly realized that he wanted her to change there, as he had teased her before the pheras. She knew that they were husband and wife, it was their first night together and there was a lot more he could be doing to her right then; yet the idea of changing there made her extremely uncomfortable.
She looked at him, almost horrified, “Nahin Maan. Yahan nahin.”
Maan’s expression did not change as he whispered, “Kya farq padta hai Geet ki tum kahan ho. Ye karna to mujhe hi hai.”
As if she wasn’t already nervous enough that he had dopped another bomb. He was going to change her clothes!
“Please Maan,” she pleaded.
“Chalo. Main tumhari pareshaani thodi kam kar deta hoon,” he said and switched off the lights by reaching out to the switches near the bed.
He went behind her and held her at the shoulder as he spoke in his heavy voice, “Geet. Tumhein pata hai na ki main ye pahle bhi kar chuka hoon. Tab majboori thi, par aaj haq.”
With the lights off, Geet’s protests gave way to desires. She let herself go. It was Maan. He had all the rights over her. And didn’t she enjoy his rights? Didn’t she want him as much as he wanted her? Wasn’t it he who had always controlled himself to keep their relationship in the limits? Otherwise, when did she ever have the strength to resist his charms? Letting go was the key to the happiness, for both of them.
He started off by unpinning the dupatta from her blouse at the shoulders. One that was off, he wrapped the skirt around her, ‘accidentally’ touching her belly and waist in the most sensual ways, before he took off her lehanga. He unbuttoned her blouse while standing behind her, but the buttons for the top of the night dress were in front. His ‘accidental’ touches were once again enough to make her go insane.
One she was dressed, she did not feel him near her for next couple of minutes and then suddenly the lights came back. He was standing facing her. As she blinked to adjust her eyes to the light, she saw that he had changed into his black vest and comfortable black pajamas. Seeing him in his vest reminded her of the time when she had seen him practicing tai-chi long back and despite her attempts to escape his attention, he had caught her. He was wearing his black vest then. He had made her wear the ear-ring she had dropped while escaping and had told her in no uncertain terms that he will not let an ‘outsider’ insult her. She had, for the first time, then, admitted to herself how he meant so much to her. And the desire for a man had fuelled in her for the first time. Desire for Maan.
Today, thanks to how he had pushed her to the brink, that desire had increased ten-fold.
When she saw him standing there in front of her, with as much desire in his eyes as was there in her heart, she could not stop herself. She just went ahead and hugged him, her hands caressing his back. He responded in kind, but soon came back to his senses.
He just could not risk it without first getting her checked up completely and knowing her condition. He also wondered if he drove her too far and if this could be harmful to her already stressed out body.
“Geet,” his voice brought her back to her senses too. She suddenly felt embarrassed at her behaviour and stepped back.
Maan noticed her embarrassment and could not help smiling. That was his Mishti. A sherni in a moment and a scared chuhiya the next. The comparison amused him even further.
He could not resist teasing her and asked innocently, “Kya hua Geet?”
She was looking everywhere except at him, “Woh.. Main… Kuchh nahin… Sorry…”
He went forward and held her hands. His voice was serious again. “Geet. Ismein ghabrane ki ya bura mahsoos karne ki kya baat hai? Mujhe to ye bahut achchha lagta hai ki tum bhi mere kareeb utna hi aana chahti ho, jitna main tumhare kareeb jaana chahta hoon.”
She smiled, still nervous, but no longer feeling bad. What else did she need other than his approval.
“Chalo Geet. Ab aaraam karo.”
As they lied down with Geet in his arms, she said, “Maan – aaj bahut kuchh kahne ka man kar raha hai, lekin munh se jaise lafz nahin nikal rahe hain.”
“Achchha hai Geet. Abhi waise bhi tumhein aaraam karna hai. So jao.”
“Maan please. Main theek hoon. Aur aaraam bhi karoongi. Lekin hum thodee der baat kar sakte hain na. Please!”
“Geet. Tumhare saath to main zindagi bhar baat kar sakta hoon. Ya yun kaho ki tum bolti rah sakti ho aur main sunta rahunga,” Maan started teasing her again. He had decided to give in to her urge to talk. Sleep could wait for a while.
“Maan – mera mazaak mat banaiye.”
“Meri aisi mazaal. Ab to shaadi ho gai hai. Ab to mujhe tumse dar kar rahna hoga.”
“Maan!”
“Mishti!”
He caught her off-guard by calling her Mishti instead of Geet. But she didn’t take long to get back in her form, “Jaiye. Mujhe koi baat nahin karni aapse.”
She turned to face away from him. But he forced her back and told her lovingly, “Geet. Aisa mat karna. Tum mujhse baat nahin karogi, to mere hothon par muskurahat kaun layega?”
“Ab aap mujhe makkhan laga rahe hain?” Geet was still irritated.
“Nahin sach bata raha hoon. Waise Geet kahna to mujhe bhi tumse kuchh hai.”
“Kya?” Geet forgot her irritation. He always had a trick up his sleeve to get her back!
“Tumhein yaad hai Geet, jab hum pahli baar mile the?”
“Kaise bhool sakti hoon?”
“Tab se ab tak kitna kuchh badal gaya hai na Geet.”
Geet snuggled up closer to him, “Kuchh bhi to nahin badla hai. Tab bhi aapne meri madad ki thi, mujhe bachaya tha. Aaj bhi aap wahi karte hain.”
She was expecting him to smile, but he turned more serious, “Meri kismat achchhi thi Geet jo usne mujhe hamesha samay se tumhare paas bhej diya. Agar aise kissie bhi mauke par tumhein kuchh ho jaata to… Main soch bhi nahin sakta…” he shuddered to think of the possibility of his life without Geet.
“Aur sochne ki zaroorat bhi nahin hai Maan. Purani baaton ko yaad kar ke dukhi kyon hona hai. Aaj to hum khush hain na.”
“Haan Geet. Aaj main bahut khush hoon aur bas ye dua maangta hoon bhagwaan se ki tumhein bhi hamesha khush rakh sakoon.”
“Bhagwaan ki bhi aisi majaal nahin ki aapki ye dua kabool na karein,” Geet once again tried to make the mood lighter.
“Lekin Geet, ek samay tha jab maine tumhein bahut dukh bhi diye hain. Main aaj un dinon ke liye maafi maangna chahta hoon.”
Geet thought he was referring to their misunderstanding over Dev’s bail and the time that followed in Indian Paints, “Maan. Aap kyon us baat ko lekar aaj tak pareshaan hote hain. Maine aapko samajhne mein galti ki thi Maan. Main aapko chhod kar gayi thi. Phir aap kyon…”
“Nahin Geet. Main uski baat nahin kar raha.”
This puzzled Geet, “Phir?”
“In sabke pahle Geet. Jab main tumse Hoshiyarpur mein mila tha, jab tum pahli baar Delhi aayi thi, jab hum office mein mile the. Geet maine bina tumhare baare mein jaane, bina kabhi tumse baat kiye, tumhein bahut kuchh galat kaha, tumhein bahut pareshaan kiya. Main un sab ke liye tumse maafi maangna chahta hoon.”
Geet suddenly sat up on the bed and started saying chirpily, “Aapko pata hai Maan, main na Babaji ki special bachchi hoon. Bhrosa nahin ho raha hai? Main batati hoon kaise! Main ek baar ek insaan se mili, jisne hamesha meri madad ki, apni jaan khatre mein daal kar na jane kitni baar meri jaan bachayi, na sirf mera sahara bana, balki mujhe khud bhi majboot banna sikhaya, apne pairon par khada hona sikhaya, apne haq ke liye ladna sikhaya. Aur main pareshaan hoti rahi ki kaise uske sab ahsaanon ke liye thanks kahun usse. Babaji se poochhti rahi aur babaji ne meri problem chutki mein solve kar di. Bajay iske ki woh insaan mujhse thanks expect kare, woh mujhse ye sab karne ke liye sorry kah raha hai. Batayie – ekdum special treatment di hai ki nahin Babaji ne mujhe?”
Maan did not say anything, just looked at her adoringly and smiled slightly.
Then Geet turned serious, “Maan – aapne kabhi kuchh bhi galat nahin kaha. Agar aapne mujhse kaha ki tum kamzor ho, to woh sach tha. Main kamzor thi. Agar aapne mujhse kaha ki jab tak tum saham-saham kar jeeti rahogi, tab tak tumhari zindagi nahin badlegi to woh bhi bilkul sach tha. Aur aapne kaha, isliye to main badli aur majboot bani. Agar aapne mujhse kaha ki mujhe duniya ki parwah nahin karni chahiye aur apne haq ke liye ladna chahiye to usmein bhi kya galat tha? Agar aapne mujhe daanta to isliye ki maine galtiyan ki thi. Maan agar aapko lagta hai ki aapne mujhe bura-bhala kaha to aisa nahin hai. Aapne sirf sach kaha. Aur kabhi kabhi sach kadwa hota hai, lekin sach se munh to nahin moda ja sakta na? Aapne mujhe hamesha sach ka saamna karna bhi to sikhaya.”
“Geet. Tum to kabhi kissi mein koi burai nahin dekh pati. To mujhme kaise dekhogi? Lekin sach to ye hai ki kai baar maine apni kadwahat tumhare oopar nikali. Lekin tumhare andar itni mithaas hai, itni strength hai ki tumne meri saari kadwahat apne andar ghol li aur phir bhi hansti rahi. Thank you Geet.”
“Agar aisa hua hai Maan to kismat ne mujhe ek aur khushi di hai ye bata kar ki main aapke liye kuchh to kar payi.”
Maan smiled and hugged her. Once they broke the embrace, Geet became her comical self again, “Waise maine aapki itni tareef kar di, iska matlab ye nahin hai ki aapne mujhe bilkul bhi pareshaan nahin kiya hai. Aapne mujhe kai baar bekaar mein bhi sazaa di hai.”
“Achchha! Woh kab hua?”
“Kab hua? Ye poochhiye ki kab nahin hua. Aapne mujhe Mr. Chopra ke project se kyon nikala tha?”
“Usmein meri galti nahin thi Geet. Kasoor tumhara tha,” Maan joked.
“Wahi to poochh rahi hoon, kya kasoor tha mera?”
“Tum mujhe pagal kar rahi thi.”
“Kya?” Geet did not understand at all.
Maan turned serious, “Sach to ye hai Geet ki main dar gaya tha tumse. Tumhari wajah se main badal raha tha. Mujhe andhere mein rahne ki aisi aadat ho gayi thi ki jo roshni mujhe tumme dikh rahi thi, usse mujhe dar lag raha tha. Main usse bhaagne ki koshish kar raha tha.”
Geet realized for the first time that he had been affected by her much before she had realized it, “To aap tab se…” She did not complete the sentence.
“Haan Geet. Maine tumse kaha tha na ki main tumse bahut pahle impressed ho gaya tha. Shayad usse bhi pahle. Shayad jab Hoshiyarpur mein tumse mila tha. Pagal tha main Geet, jo apni khushiyon se itna door bhagne ki koshish karta raha. Aur uske chakkar mein use bhi thes pahuncha raha tha jo mere liye sabse keemti thi. Tum!”
Geet laughed slightly, “Aapse badi pagal to main thi. Aap meri wajah se itna pareshaan hote rahe, aur main aapko Dusht Danav samajhti rahi.”
“Hmm… Aur usi Dusht Danav ke peechhe daudti hui Dargah tak pahunch gayi, haan Geet?”
This made Geet blush, “Mera mazaak mat banaiye. Aapke phone se main ghabra gayi thi.”
Maan turned Geet’s face towards him by holding her chin, “Itni fikr karti thi meri, aur phir bhi mujhe chhod kar jana chahti thi. Meri shakal tak nahin dekhna chahti thi.”
She silence him by putting her hands on his lips, “Thank you. Jo aapne mujhe jaane nahin diya. Warna…”
“Apni jaan ko kaun itni aasaani se jaane deta hai Geet,” Maan said cupping her face in his hands. Then he suddenly changed his tone, “Waise phir bhi. Tum mujhe thank kar sakti ho. Mujhe koi aitraaz nahin hai. Lekin sirf thanks kahne se kaam nahin chalega. Mujhe ek gift bhi dena hoga.”
Geet looked up to see the naughtiness in his eyes.
“Maan!”
But Maan was too busy pushing her down on the bed to listen to her. His lips moved towards her, but she turned her face sideways in shyness. Maan kissed on her cheek and said, “Koi baat nahin, maine apna thanks dheere-dheere le loonga.”
And they chatted away until Geet fell asleep with exhaustion!
The Past Haunts
Geet woke up at night and did not find Maan by her side. She looked around to find him near the window looking outside. He was facing away from her; so she could not see his face. She wondered what was keeping him awake at that hour of night.
She walked up to him and touched his arms, “Maan!”
His face showed excessive worry as he turned back. He immediately took her in his arms and hugged her tight. She hugged him back as a natural reaction to his hug, but could not fathom the reason behind his worry.
Before she could ask, he started speaking nervously, “Geet – tum mujhse naraaz mat hona. Mujhe chhod kar kabhi mat jaana Geet. Main nahin jee paunga tumhare bina.”
“Shaant ho jaiye Maan. Ye aap kaisi baatein kar rahe hain? Main aapko chhod kar kyon jaungi?”
“Ek baar tum mujhe chhod kar gayi thi, to main insaan se haiwaan ban gaya tha,” he was recalling how he behaved at Indian Paints after she had walked out on him and refused to marry him, “Mujhse waada karo Geet ki agar mujhse koi galti bhi ho jaye, to tum mujhe jo chahe sazaa de dogi, leking mujhe chhod kar nahin jaogi.”
His pain and worry was now hurting her too. She blinked back the tears coming in her eyes, before breaking the hug and taking his hands his hers, “Maan. Woh meri galti thi aur main sapne mein bhi aisi galti dubara nahin kar sakti. Kya maine saat pheron ke saath hi aapse waada nahin kiya tha ki main hamesha aapke saath rahungi. Sukh-dukh mein, achchhe-bure waqt mein?”
He just nodded and did not say anything. So, she continued, “Aap chahein to main hazaar baar ye waada kar sakti hoon Maan. Kuchh bhi ho jaye main aapko chhod kar kahin nahin jaungi. Kaise ja sakti hoon main kahin? Meri saari duniya, mere saare rishte, meri zindagi – sab aap par shuru ho kar aapse hi khatam hote hain. Aap mere pati hain, mere bachche ke pita hain. Koi bhi muskil, koi bhi problem in bandhano se oopar nahin ho sakti mere liye. Aap please aise khayal apne man se nikaal dijiye. Aur mujhe bataiye ki hua kya hai.”
Her words calmed him down and it reflected on his face too. He hugged her again, a more relaxed hug this time.
“Kuchh nahin hua hai Geet. Bas ek bura sapna dekha tha aur neend toot gayi. Tum kaise uth gayi Geet, kuchh chahiye tha?”
“Mujhe pyaas lagi thi. Kamre mein paani khatam ho gaya hai. Main le kar aati hoon.
“Nahin tum aaraam karo,” he said touching her tummy and smiling, “Hamare baby ko aise raat ko pareshaan karna theek nahin hai. Main paani le kar aata hoon. Kuchh aur chahiye?”
“Nahin,” she said smiling back.
He got her the water and they lied down with Geet in his arms. She was soon asleep, but Maan had lost his sleep. He recalled seeing her in the afternoon, after he was coming out of a meeting at a client’s office.
“Hi MK,” she had called out to him.
He froze as he looked at her. The face and voice were difficult to miss, even though he had buried them in the past somehow.
“Sameera!” He spoke involuntarily.
“Cool. Tum bhoole nahin ho…” she had started the conversation, but he just turned back, got into his car and drove away.
He had never told Geet about her. He hadn’t intentionally wanted to keep her in the dark. But he just did not want to relive those painful memories. And with Geet’s own past haunting her so badly until recently, he did not want to add to her stress with his story. The story of a past that should have no effect on their beautiful future together. He did not bother with it.
But seeing Sameera that afternoon had shaken him. For th first time he consciously felt that it was a mistake on his part to not tell Geet about her. How would she feel if she came to know about it now? What if it stressed her out? And given her complicated pregnancy, could he risk that?
—
Geet was already in the meeting with the client when Maan walked into his cabin. He shook hands with Mr. Mishra, “Mujhe pichhli meeting mein der ho gayi Mr. Mishra…”
“No Problem Mr. Khurana. Ms. Geet ne meeting time par shuru kar di thi aur hamein aapki company ka initial brief de bhi diya hai.”
Maan smiled at Geet, “Thank you Geet.”
Geet smiled back and drew his attention to the woman accompanying Mr. Mishra, “Maan – aap inse mile nahin. Mr. Mishra ki dost hain aur shayad aap dono ek doosre ko achchhi tarah jaante hain.”
Maan noticed her then.
“Hi MK. Long time!” Sameera was smiling.
“Mr. Khurana. Sameera meri dost hai. Jab maine ise bataya ki main aapse meeting karne ke liye aa raha hoon to ye bhi saath aa gayi. Aapse milne.”
“Maan, Sameera bata rahi thi ki aap college mein saath padhte the,” Geet said enthusiastically. She was genuinely happy to meet a friend of Maan’s.
Maan unconsciously clutched Geet’s hand surprising her, as he looked sternly at Sameera. Sameera noticed him clutching Geet’s hand.
He addressed Mr. Mishra instead, “To hum discussion continue karein.”
“Sure.”
As they all sat down, Maan realized that he was holding Geet’s hand and left it feeling awkward.
Geet noticed that Maan was not able to pay attention to the discussion at all. So, apart from taking notes, she also had to continue handling the actual discussion. At the end of it Mr. Mishra asked Maan, “So, Mr. Khurana. Maine apni requirements more or less explain kar di hain. What is the way forward?”
Maan had hardly paid attention to what was going on in the meeting. He looked absentmindedly at Geet.
“Mr. Mishra. Hum do dinon mein aapko proposal bhej denge, jismein priliminary designs aur budget estimates honge,” Geet replied to his question.
“Sure. Thank you Ms. Geet.”
He shook hands with Maan and Geet and left with Sameera.
Geet could not hold herself back any longer and she turned to Maan as soon as the visitors left the room, “Maan. Kya baat hai? Aap kal se hi pareshaan hain aur abhi bhi meeting mein aap dhyaan nahin de rahe the. Sameera aapki friend hai lekin aapne usse ek baar bhi baat nahin ki. Kya problem hai?”
“Koi problem nahin hai Geet. Hum baad mein baat karte hain. Abhi tum jao.”
“Lekin Maan…”
But Maan pretended to be rude, “Geet. Main tumhare boss ki haisiyat se tumhein bol raha hoon ki abhi mujhe akele rah kar kuchh kaam karna hai. To jao yahan se.”
There was a time when she used to get really angry at his I-am-the-boss card. But by now she was well aware that he played it only when he was disturbed out of his mind. She decided to oblige him for the time being. Office would not be the best place to tackle him in this bad mood.
—
She was thinking about it while walking back to her cabin, when she realized just how odd his behaviour with Sameera was. From the way Sameera had introduced herself, it appeared that they knew each other very well. Then why this coldness towards her? She also realized that his mood was fine when he had entered the room. But it went for a toss as soon as he saw Sameera. What was wrong? Why wouldn’t he tell her?
She had barely reached back to her cabin, when she noticed through the partially open blinds that Sameera had come back to Maan’s cabin.
—
“Tum yahan kyon aayi ho Sameera?”
“Kya main tumse do minute baat bhi nahin kar sakti?”
“Mujhe tumse koi baat nahin karni hai. Aur haan – jahan tak main samjhta hoon, tum Mr. Mishra ki friend ho. Unke business se tumhara koi lena-dena nahin hai. To behtar hoga ki tum hamare saath hone waali business meetings mein na aao.”
“Come on MK. For old time’s sake. Oh! Or are you too scared of your secretary? Tumhare taste ko kya ho gaya hai? What’s her name? Geet – yeah!”
“Mrs. Geet Khurana!” Maan replied sharply. “Geet meri wife aur is company ki co-owner hai Sameera. Tameez se baat karo uske baare mein.”
Geet had just reached the door of his cabin and heard him shouting at Sameera. She hesitated and stopped there instead of going in.
Sameera was shocked as she realized that Maan was married to Geet. But she immediately came back to herself, “I am impressed MK. Such a successful boss-secretary romance! Daad deni padegi us ladki ki. She has got brains.”
“Sameera. Main aakhiri baar tumhein kah raha hoon. Geet ko judge karne ki tumhari aukaat nahin hai. Geet ka naam bhi dubara apni zubaan par mat laana. Tum us layak nahin ho. Isi waqt yahan se chali jao. Dubara mere ya Geet ke saamne aane ki koshish bhi mat karna. Agar abhi ke abhi tum yahan se nahin gayin to main apni hadein bhool jaunga and khud dhakke maar kar tumhein bahar nikaal doonga. Leave. Now!” his eyes showed extreme anger and hatred for Sameera. His roaring voice added to the impact.
Even Geet got scared looking at this side of Maan. Sameera was frightened out of her wits with his anger and left immediately.
Geet stepped back so that Sameera did not see her while coming out of Maan’s cabin. She considered going to Maan and asking him about what transpired. But she decided against it. He should feel comfortable enough to tell her himself. She would pretend she did not hear anything until she can get him to speak his mind.
—
Maan saw Nakul coming in their room with the food trolley. Geet followed him in to the room. Maan looked at her questioningly.
She said after Nakul left, “Dadi Ma bahar gayi hui hain. Dinner bhi apni friend ke yahan karengi. To maine socha ki hum apna khana kamre mein hi mangwa lein.”
Maan smiled, went to her and hugged her from behind, “Kyon? Khane ke saath kya karne ka irada hai Mrs. Khurana?”
“Khana khane ka Mr. Khurana,” Geet replied promptly freeing herself from his hug and started arranging their plates. Maan stopped her and asked her to sit on the bed. He would bring the food.
“Main kar rahi hoon na Maan!”
“Nahin Geet. Tum ja kar baitho,” he practically pushed her away.
Geet made a baby face, but did what he asked her to do.
Maan came to her and sat down on the bed with food in one plate.
“Ek hi plate?”
“Hmm. Apno ka jootha to kha sakte hain na Geet?”
They were reminded of the incident when he had asked her the same question during Pari’s visit. She had dodged the question then, by saying that she did not understand him. Today, she blushed and happily took the bite that he was holding in front of her.
“Aaj main apni pyaari si biwi aur baby ko apne haathon se khana khilaunga.”
Geet tore a piece of chapati from the plate, dipped it in the curry and took it near Maan’s mouth, “Par aapki problem ye hai ki apni biwi aur baby ke chakkar mein aap apna khayal rakhna bhool jate hain.”
“Kya farq padta hai Geet? Tum ho na mera khayal rakhne ke liye,” he took in the bite from her. Then added, “Hamesha rahogi na mere paas Geet?” His face again started showing the worry she had seen last night.
She took the plate from his hands and kept it on the side table. Then she held his hands and asked, “Maan. Aisi kya kami rah gayi hai mere pyaar mein jo aapko mere saath ka bharosa nahin ho raha hai? Aap mujhe bas ek baar boliye ki main kaise aapka bharosa wapas jeetoon – main kuchh bhi karoongi iske liye.”
“Nahin Geet, nahin,” he hastened to reply as he realized that he was unnecessarily making her feel guilty, “Tumhare pyaar, vishwas aur samarpan mein koi kami nahin hai Geet. Ho hi nahin sakti. Tum aisa kabhi mat sochna. Lekin…”
“Lekin kya Maan?”
“Agar mujhse koi galti ho gai ho to?”
“Aap kabhi galat nahin hote Maan. Aapka kiya hua koi bhi kaam meri nazar mein galti nahin ho sakta. Aur agar kuchh galat kiya bhi hai aapne to mujhe pata hai ki mere bhale ki liye hi kiya hoga. Aap aaj Sameera par chilla rahe the – ye sahi baat to nahin hai. Lekin woh bhi aapne mere liye hi kiya,” she had forgotten about her decision of not letting him know that she had heard his conversation with Sameera.
Maan looked at her in shock. How much had she heard?
“Maan. Aap please mujh par aur hamare rishte par bharosa kijiye aur jo bhi aapke man mein hai bata dijiye. Hamein ek doosre ka imtihaan thode hi na lena hai. Hamein to zindagi ke saare imtihaan mil kar dene hain. Jaisa ki humne ab tak kiya hai. Aapne meri saari pareshaaniyon ko apna liya Maan. Main bhi wahi karoongi. Bina sharton ke pyaar karna, saath nibhana maine aapse hi seekha hai. Main kabhi peechhe nahin hatoongi. Bataiye Maan.”
She had managed to instill confidence in him finally.
“Geet. Mujhe tum par poora bharosa hai. Haan kabhi-kabhi main bhi tumhari saaf-dili, bholepan aur maasoomiyat se dhokha kha jata hoon. Dar lagta hai ki kahin pareshaaniyan tumhare bardasht ke bahar na ho jayen, kahin tum unke tale dab na jao. Lekin tum hamesha mujhe yaad dila deti ho ki bachchon ki tarah hansne-khelne waali meri Geet ke peechee ek bahut mature aur strong ladki hai, jo duniya ki sabse achchi biwi hai aur bahut kabil Maa banne ja rahi hai, jo hamesha meri takat banti hai. Geet meri zindagi tumhari hi to hai. Tumse nahin share karoonga to kisse karoonga. Lekin pahle khana kha lo Geet. Tumhara bhookhe rahna tum dono ki sehat ke liye achchha nahin hai. Hum phir baat karenge.”
She nodded in agreement. They finished their dinner, feeding each other and lost in each other’s eyes.
But when it came to telling her, Maan felt nervous again. He got up from the bed and walked to the window. Geet followed him. Together they looked at the moon and remembered all the occasions when the moon had been the witness of their promises of love and togetherness.
“Geet – meri zindagi mein pahle bhi ek ladki thi.” Finally Maan managed to say and he looked at Geet to see her reaction. She appeared surprised, but calm, but he wasn’t sure he was reading her expressions correctly. So, he hastened to clarify, “Lekin Geet. Isse kuchh galat mat samajhna. Usse hamare aaj aur aane waale kal par koi farq nahin padta. Woh ladki meri zindagi ki bahut badi bhool thi. Woh rishta mere ateet ka ek kaala hissa tha, jise maine dafna diya hai. Jab tak tum meri zindagi mein nahin aayi thi, tab tak main ateet ke us andhere se ubar nahin paaya tha. Lekin Geet, jabse maine tumhein paya, meri zindagi mein nayi roshni aa gayi aur main us roshni ke liye swarthi ho gaya. Mujhe tumhein batana chahiye tha Geet ki tum meri zindagi mein pahli ladki nahin ho, lekin…”
“Lekin aakhiri to hoon na Maan?” Geet asked lovingly.
Maan almost cried with happiness and relief when she said that, “Haan Geet. Aakhiri – sirf is zindagi ke liye nahin, balki aane waali har zindagi ke liye bhi.”
“Aapne isliye mujhe pahle nahin bataya na Maan kyonki aap bure waqt ko yaad nahin karna chahte the?”
“Haan Geet.”
“To aapne theek kiya Maan. Aur aap bilkul sahi kar rahe the. Isse hamare rishte, hamare aaj ya hamare aane waale kal par koi farq nahin padta. Jab aapka mere liye pyaar poora hai Maan, jab usmein kabhi koi kami mujhe mahsoos nahin hui, to ateet ki kahaniyon se hamein kya lena dena hai. Mujhe aapse koi shikayat nahin hai.”
“Sach kah rahi ho Geet?”
“Bilkul,” she smiled.
He came close to her, cupped her face in his hands and said, “Thank you Geet. Tumne mujhe ek baar phir is andhere se nikaal diya.” He pulled her into a hug.
“Lekin Maan mujhe aapse ek shikayat zaroor hai,” she said breaking the hug.
“Kya Geet?” Maan was caught unawares.
“Jis cheez ko aap yaad nahin karna chahte, jisse aapka ab koi matlab nahin hai, woh baat aapne mujhe nahin batayi, to mujhe koi problem nahin hai. Lekin aap kal se pareshaan the iski wajah se, aur aap mujhe batane mein itna jhijhak rahe the? Ye to sahi nahin hai na Maan? Mujhe jaanne ka haq hai na agar koi baat aapko pareshaan kar rahi hai?”
“Haan Geet. I am sorry. Main dar gaya tha. Mujhe laga ki agar tum is baat ke wajah se parehsaan hui ya stress liya to tumhare aur baby ki health ke liye sahi nahin rahega. Doctor ne khaas kar ye kaha tha pichhle check-up mein.”
“Maan. Jab tak aap mere saath hain, aur khush hain, main kissi bhi cheez ka stress nahin loongi. Lekin, jab aapko pareshaan dekhti hoon – jaise kal raat se dekh rahi thi, to main bhi pareshaan ho jati hoon. Aap mujhse waada kijiye ki aage se aap apni pareshaaniyan mujhse share karenge, chhupayenge nahin.”
“Waada karta hoon Geet. Aage se aisa nahin hoga.”
“Waise kya Sameera hi woh ladki hai?”
“Haan.” And told her about him meeting her the day before.
“Uske saath problem kya hui thi Maan? Aur woh wapas kyon aayi hai?”
“Geet. Main un baaton ko dohrana nahin chahta. Bas itna samajh lo ki woh paison ki bhookhi thi. Aur shayad usi ke liye wapas aayi hai.”
“Theek hai. Aap nahin yaad karna chahte to main aapse aur kuchh nahin poochhoongi. Lekin aap ab uske wapas aane ki wajah se pareshaan to nahin hain?”
“Geet. Tum mere saath ho to ab mujhe uske aane ki koi chinta nahin hai. Lekin haan, tum usse door rahna Geet. Waise to main hamesha tumhare saath rahta hoon. Lekin phir bhi – tum apna dhyaan rakhna. Uska jo bhi maksad hai woh uske liye kissi bhi hadd tak ja sakti hai. Main nahin chahta ki Nayantara ki tarah phir koi tumhare ya hamare bachche ke liye khatra ban jaye.”
Geet lightened the situation by becoming her comical self, “Haan. Pareshaan to aap meri hi wajah se hote hain na? Jab koi aur cheez na mile pareshaan hone ke liye, Geet ke liye pareshaan ho jao. Hai na?”
As Maan stared at her in surprise, she smiled reassuringly, “Main poora dhyaan rakhoongi. Chinta mat kijiye. Waise bhi mujhe aapke rahte kuchh nahin ho sakta.”
Maan smiled and planted a caring kiss on her forehead.
And then, as he looked at her smiling, becautiful face, he got lost. Free of his insecurity and guilt, he felt like he needed to own her completely. Her kissed her eyes, cheeks, nose, neck and shoulders one by one. Then he placed his lips on hers in a very passionate and aggressive kiss that left her panting. He picked her up in his arms and settled her on the bed. As he climbed into the bed next to her and continued exploring her body with his sensual touches and kisses, Geet realized that it was not their usual foreplay. He had indeed forgotten about …
“Maan…” she called out his name and put her hands on her tummy, “Nahin…. Baby…”
That suddenly brought him back to the reality. The doctor had advised them against having sex due to the complications in her pregnancy. How did he let himself forget that? He immediately withdrew from her. He was looking lost.
Geet sat up and looked at him feeling guilty. She was on the verge of crying, “I am sorry Maan.”
Maan looked at her in surprise, “Nahin Geet. Tum sorry kyon bol rahi ho. Sorry to mujhe kahna chahiye. In fact thanks kahna chahiye tumhein ki tumne mujhe itni badi galti karne se rok liya. Please Geet. Ye baby hum dono ki responsibility hai na? Aur agar humme se koi is maamle mein galti kare to doosre ko rokna to chahiye hi na? Jab tum apni sehat ka khayal nahin rakhti ho to main tumhein daantta hoon ki nahin?”
Geet smiled and nodded.
“Geet – maine tumse pahle bhi ek baar kaha tha. Hamare paas to poori zindagi hai saath bitane ke liye. To kuchh mahino ka intezaar kya badi baat hai? Main to poori zindagi tumhara intezaar karne ko taiyaar tha. Aur tum bhi to mujhe mere baal safed hone tak intezaar karwane waali thi Geet! Bhool gayin?” Maan teased her about the incident when in her nervousness she had blurted out that he didn’t need her confession so soon because his hair had not become grey yet.
Both of them laughed remembering the incident.
Suddenly Maan turned serious, “Sach bataun Geet. Rishte chahe kitne bhi rahe hon meri zindagi mein, lekin tumse milne ke baad maine jaana ki pyaar kya hota hai. Apne liye kuchh paane ki koshish karna pyaar nahin hota Geet. Pyar ka asli ehsaas to tab hota hai jab apne pyar ke liye kuchh bhi karna aapka maksad ban jaye.”
“Ye baat aapse behtar kaun jaanta hai Maan?”
“Nahin Geet. Ye to maine tumse seekha hai. Tum jab pyaar karti ho to apne baare mein nahin sochti Geet. Apne bachche se pyaar kiya to sirf ye socha ki uski jaan kaise bachegi. Apni zindagi khatre mein daal di. Mujhe chahne lagi to mere bhala soch kar mujhe khud se door karne ki koshish karti rahi. Kabhi parwah nahin ki apne dil ki – us par kya guzar rahi hai. Aur main? Main to bas tumehin paane ke liye pagal hua baitha tha Geet. Tumhein kitna pareshaan kiya maine, kitna sataya tumhein tumhare ehsaas ka izhaar karwane ke liye. Agar maine tab pyaar ko samjha hota to main jaanne ki koshish karta ki tum kyon mujhse door bhag rahi thi, tumhare hanste chehre aur chubulepan ke peechhe chhipe dard ko samajhne ki koshish karta. Lekin main to bas ye soch raha the ki mujhe kya chahiye. Mujhe tum chahiye thi aur is dhun mein tumhara dard mujhe dikh hi nahin raha tha, Geet…”
“Bas Maan,” Geet could not take him beating himself up any more, “Aapko kya koi sapna aata ki meri pareshaani kya thi. Jab maine aapko bataya hi nahin tha to aap kaise samajh sakte the.”
“Wahi to baat hai na Geet. Tumne mujhe nahin bataya kyonki tum mujhe chahti thi aur mujhe pareshaan nahin karna chahti thi. Lekin mujhe to tumse poochhna chahiye tha.”
“Maan. Ho sakta hai aap tab us tarah se apne pyaar ka izhaar nahin kar paye, jaise aaj karte hain. Lekin mujhse bhi to poochhiye ki agar aap sach mein itne swarthi the jitna aapko lagta hai, to main kaise pyaar kar baithi aapse?”
“Meri kismat achchi thi Geet.”
“Nahin Maan. Us samay mujhe atma-vishwas ki zaroorat thi, duniya ka saamna karne ki himmat ki zaroorat thi. Maine apne bachche ki zindagi bachane ka faisla to le liye tha, lekin us faisle ko anzaam dene ki taqat nahin thi mujhme. Aapne mujhe wo atma-vishwas, woh himmat, woh taqat di Maan. Hum dono ye sochte rahe ki hum ek doosre se lad rahe hain. Lekin aap to jhagde ke bahane bhi mujhe majboot bana rahe the. Ye tha aapka pyaar, jise aap samajh bhi nahin pa rahe the. Aapne mujhe woh pyaar diya tha jiski mujhe zaroorat thi.”
Suddenly she changed her tone and faked sternness, “Aur haan Mr. Khurana. Maana ki aap apni wife ki tareef karna chahte hain, lekin iska matlab ye nahin ki aap mere husband ki burai karein. Geet Khurana ye bilkul bardasht nahin karegi! Samjhe aap?”
Maan smiled, “Dekha Geet. Tum ab bhi, mere khud ke munh se bhi meri burai nahin sun sakti…”
Geet put her hands on his lips, “Ab bas. Chup. Bilkul chup.”
Maan found no other way of expressing what he was feeling, except to pull her in his arms in a tight hug.
After a few moments, he said, “Tum so jao Geet. Main Mr. Mishra ke project ka kuchh kaam dekh leta hoon. Din mein kuchh kaam nahin kar paya main.”
“Main aapko brief de deti hoon meeting ki. Waise bhi aap kuchh sun to rahe nahin the.”
“Bilkul nahin. Main tumhein office mein kaam karne deta hoon, taki tumhara man laga rahe aur tum meri nazaron ke saamne raho. Lekin abhi tumhare aaraam ka waqt hai aur ismein koi laparwahi nahin honi chahiye. Samjhi tum? Main tumhare notes padh loonga.”
“Lekin Maan, mujhe neend nahin aa rahi.”
He gave her a stern look and she immediately backed off.
“Theek hai – main sone ja rahi hoon. Aise mat ghooriye.”
He smiled, confirmed that she had taken her medicines and wished her good night before going to his desk to work on the project.
The Camera Blunder
Note on the OS
Before the wedding, when Geet refused to shift to the main mansion from the outhouse, Maan arranged for CCTV cameras in her room so that he could keep an eye on her all the time. It was for her safety, but it could lead to other interesting things as well. One of those have been explored in this OS.
—
Geet threw her dupatta on the bed and started taking off her kurti. And then she suddenly remembered the cameras, looked at the one which must be capturing her at the moment. She was shocked and embarrassed. She hurried towards the bathroom with her night dress.
Was he there? Did he …? Her embarrassment knew no bounds. What would he think? But he won’t be monitoring the camera. He himself might have just returned to his room after the tiring day filled with rituals. He definitely wasn’t there. She was convincing herself of this as she came out of the bathroom; only to find him in her room. He hadn’t yet changed his clothes.
“Aap?” She stopped in her tracks.
“Haan, main. Kyon nahin aa sakta?” He sounded perfectly normal and started moving towards her.
If she had not been so nervous about her situation, she would have retorted that he wasn’t allowed in her maayka at night. But she wasn’t in her senses. Did he? Did he not?
He had come close to her by then. His eyes were penetrating her entire being. He ran his index finger across her temple. She closed her eyes and involuntarily whispered his name, “Maan!”
Maan came behind her and dug his hands into her hair. He started playing with her hair, which was untied. He was also occasionally caressing her neck, nape and shoulders.
“Kya baat hai Geet? Kuchh kahna chahti ho?” His voice was still steady and normal, as if he wasn’t driving her crazy with his seductive moves, but was disucssing when to leave for the office!
Geet moved away from him. She wasn’t going to be able to think clearly, if he kept doing THAT to her.
“Aap is waqt yahan kyon aaye hain?”
He came close to her again, moved her hair to one side and made her gasp by opening the back zip of her night dress a bit. He slid it a little from her shoulder, almost as much as she had slid her kurti when she had forgotten about the camera.
“Ye dekhne ke liye ki agar main tumhare saamne rahunga, phir bhi tum bhaag jaogi kya?”
She closed her eyes and bit her lower lips, when he said that. He had seen it. She was highly embarrassed and yet felt a sweet tingling. She was losing it. She had to come back to her senses.
Pushed by this thought, she gathered herself together and moved away from him once more, adjusting her top and adjusting her hair on the back so that her back revealed by the partly unzipped dress got covered. She was facing away from him.
Maan smiled indulgently as he saw her doing all this. He decided that he had tortured her enough for one day. Anyway, the wedding was not far away! He could wait.
Geet took a deep breath to get back in control and turned towards Maan with fake anger. She flustered for a bit when she saw him smiling, but soon regained her composure and pretended to scold him.
“Aapko raat mein mere maayke mein aana mana hai, pata hai na aapko? Aur abhi koi light bhi nahin gayi hai ki mere dar ke bahane aap yahan aa gaye hain.”
Maan was taken aback to see the change in her, but why should he be surprised. This was his sherni. What else could be expected of her? She would attack back, of course.
“Geet. Jitne ulte-seedhe kayde banane hain, shaadi tak bana lo. Ab to shaadi bhi door nahin hai. Phir uske baad tumhara koi bahana nahin chalega.”
“Ye aap mujhe baar-baar shaadi ke baad ki dhamki kyon dete rahte hain? Shaadi ke baad kya kha jayenge aap mujhe?”
As usual she had spoken in front of him without thinking. His indulgent smile became naughty.
He came to her and said, “Kuchh aisa hi samajh lo.”
Geet was again too embarrassed to think of a retort. She did not meet his eyes and kept looking here and there in nervousness.
He suddenly lifted her in his arms. As she looked into his eyes, which seemed to devour her in their own loving way, she gave up all the resistance. If he wanted her, he would have her today. Who was she to resist anyway? She was his wax doll. He could mould her in any way he wanted. And she loved it that way. The only thing that mattered to her was that he was there. Her lover, her saviour, her God. She did not have to think of right and wrong, when he made a decision.
He settled her on the bed and sat beside her.
“Tumhein mujh par bharosa hai na Geet?”
“Bhagwan se bhi zyada.”
“Bas itna hi chahiye Geet. Main tumhare bharose ka imtihaan nahin loonga. Main tumhara intezaar karoonga Geet. Aur agar tumehin pareshaani hai to… hum camera hatwa denge. Tumhari security ka main koi aur intezaam…”
She put her hand on his lips, “Jo cheez mujhe aapke kareeb rakhti ho, usse mujhe pareshaani kaise ho sakti hai?”
She always managed to surprise and overwhelm him with her trust in him. Sometimes he truly felt like a God, because she treated him like one.
He smiled and moved close to her. His lips were coming close to hers. She had closed her eyes. He surprised her by kissing on her cheek instead. She opened her eyes and blushed.
“Mujhe apne kareeb mahsoon karna chahti ho Geet?”
She did not say anything in reply. She did not even nod. She just looked at him with with her innocent, trusting eyes, which had a ‘yes’ in them.
He pulled her close, put one of his hands on her back and dug through her hair to caress her bare back. She was startled, as she wasn’t expecting this from him now.
“To aaj raat apne dress ki zip band mat karna. Mujhe mahsoos karti rahogi.”
He suddenly left her, gave her a naughty smile and walked out of the room, closing the door behind him. By the time she understood what he had said, he was already gone. She blushed heavily and tried to unsuccessfully touch her back, where he had touched her. Then she lied down smiling.
Maan came back to look at the camera footage after changing for the night. She was asleep. Suddenly she turned in her sleep and was now lying on her stomach. He could see her open zip through her hair. He had thought of teasing her, but looked like he was going to be the one unable to sleep that night. He wasn’t sure what was driving him crazier. That she was so beautiful and desirable or the innocence and infinite trust with which she was ready to do everything he asked of her?
Back from the Guilt Trip
He tried everything to dissuade her. Tried to distract her with jokes, with romance and even pretended to shout at her for being unnecessarily stubborn.
But nothing worked. As if he didn’t know that she could see through his heart and mind. He had to tell her. How should he do it?
“Geet. Main bahut swarthi ho gaya tha – pata nahin tum mujhe maaf kar paogi ya nahin?”
“Aapka swarth main nahin jaanti kya? Geet, Geet aur sirf Geet ki khusiyan. Phir aap aisa kyon kah rahe hain?”
“Geet – mere saamne bahut mushkil sawaal tha. Mujhe tummein aur tumhari khushiyon mein se ek ko chunna tha. Aur maine tumhein chuna. Tumhari khushiyon se oopar apni zindagi ko chuna.”
“Aap paheliyan kyon bujha rahe hain Maan. Iska kya matlab hai? Aur agar kuchh aisa hua bhi hai to mujhe vishwas hai ki aapke faisle ki koi wajah hogi. Mujhe saaf-saaf bataiye ki aap kis cheez ke baare mein baat kar rahe hain. Please Maan – main aapko aise ghutte hue nahin dekh sakti.”
“Geet. Agar sab jaanne ke baad tum mujhe maaf nahin kar payin to main tumhein dosh nahin doonga. Lekain ho sake to maaf karne ki koshish karna…”
“Maan!” Geet was herself on the verge of breaking down seeing him suffer like this. But she controlled herself. He needed her right now. She held his hands tight in hers.
“Geet – jab tum hospital mein thi, to tumhari halat bahut kharaab ho chuki thi. Aur doctor ne kaha ki ye bhi naubat aa sakti hai ki mujhe tummhare…. aur…. hamare bachche… ke… beech mein kissi ek ko chunna padega…” He was choking on his words.
Geet looked terrified. She had been feeling too safe in his arms all this while. She hadn’t known what was the true extent of the danger she… and their child was in.
“Geet! Bhagwan ko mujhpar zaroor daya aa gai hogi ki chamatkar ki tarah tum dono hi bach gaye. Lekin jab mujhse chunne ko kaha gaya tha to maine…” He paused and closed his eyes before saying the final words, “tumhein chuna tha.”
Geet’s face showed a mixture of emotions – shock, fear, concern… Maan opened his eyes and looked at her. After waiting for few seconds, he assumed that she was too angry with him to talk to him. He started moving away. But she suddenly tightened her grip on his hands.
“Maan. Ye sach hai ki mujhe bahut gussa aa raha hai. Pata nahin aap par ya apni kismat par jisne aapke saamne aisa sawaal khada kar diya tha. Agar aap meri marzi poochhte to aap bhi jaante hain ki main kissi bhi keemat par hamare bachche ko bachati…”
“Main jaanta hoon Geet… Maine tumhara bharosa toda hai aur tum mujhe maaf nahin kar paogi…” He was not looking into her eyes.
“Meri baat abhi poori nahin hui hai. Main gussa hoon, lekin iska matlab ye nahin ki main aap par vishwas karna band kar doongi.”
This surprised Maan and he looked her. He was still guilty and also confused.
“Haan Maan. Iska matlab ye nahin ki main hamare bachche ke liye aapke pyaar ko chhota samajh rahi hoon. Agar main iski maa hoon to aap iske pita hai. Aur mujhe pata hai ki aap bhi isse utna hi pyaar karte hain jitna main karti hoon. Itna to main aapko jaanti hoon na Maan?”
Once again she had overwhelmed him with her devotion to him, her faith in him. All the tears he had contrlled in the hospital, found their way out. He saw no reasons to stop them. It did not matter. He was with her. No one can take advantage of his moment of weakness.
Geet left his hand and initiated a hug.
They were still in each others’ arms when she spoke.
Sadness was clear in her voice, “Mujhe bahut bura lag raha hai Maan ki aapko akele aisi mushkil ghadi ka saamna karna pada. Main aapke saath aapki madad karne ke liye nahin thi. Lekin aapko pata hai na ki agar phir kabhi aisi baat hui, to aapko kya faisla…”
Maan broke the hug and silenced her by putting his hands on her lips. Determination and aggression were oozing out of him when he replied, “Nahin Geet. Ab nahin. Dubara aisa kuchh nahin hoga. Maine bhagwaan ko maanna shuru kar diya hai Geet. Lekin sach kah raha hoon, iske baad main tum dono ke liye bhagwan tak se lad jaunga. Dubara aisa kuchh nahin hoga.”
His aggression was scary. Geet touched and caressed his cheeks and that had a calming effect on him. Then she hugged him again.
Ununderstood Feelings
Note on the OS
There were many a things that were not properly explored since CVs hurried through the Dev’s exposure track.
Maan had accepted Geet without knowing that her culprit was his own brother. We, as audience, knew it. But I felt that this aspect of this relationship should have been explained to at least one more character in the serial too. Probably to Dev or Daadi or some friend. Also, the entire track of Daadi’s reaction to Geet’s pregnancy had practically not been explored. This OS is an attempt to explore some of those things.
And sorry for that weird word “ununderstood”. I wanted one word for “not understood” and “misunderstood” was not the right word. Some online dictionaries did list the word “ununderstood”. So, I went ahead with it.
—
Although Annie had been looking after all the arrangements and office staff had very enthusiastically pitched in to help in the wedding arrangements, the day had been tiring for Maan. The wedding was scheduled for the next day. And besides the wedding preparations, his worries about Geet’ safety would not let him rest. He kept running to check on her on some pretext or the other.
A while back, Annie had forcefully sent him to his room to take some rest. He should be able to enjoy his wedding, she had argued. Once he was alone, the only thought on his mind was that of Geet. He either felt worried about her, or felt extremely elated at the thought that in a day she was going to be his – completely and forever.
While he was dealing with his oscilating mood, Dadi entered the room.
“Dadi Ma! Koi kaam tha?”
“Nahin Maan beta. Kaam to sab log kar hi rahe hain. Main to bas aapse baat karne aa gayi.”
“Kuchh khaas baat hai kya?” His words were neutral, but Maan suddenly looked worried.
“Nahin beta. Aap itne nervous kyon ho rahe hain? Koi problem waali baat nahin hai. Bas humne socha ki kal aapki zindagi ka itna bada din hai, to ek baar pata kar loon. Aap khush to hain na?”
“Of course, Dadi Ma. Ye aap achanak kya poochh rahi hain? Aap achchhi tarah jaanti hain ki Geet hi meri khushi hai.”
“Hum aapko thanks bhi kahna chah rahe the.”
“Thanks? Woh kisliye Dadi Ma?”
“Aapne jo kiya hai wo aasaan nahin hai Maan. Ye jaante hue bhi ki Geet aapke bhai ke bachche ki Maa banne waali hai, aapne use apnaya. Agar aap aisa nahin karte, to pata nahin Dev ne jo Geet ke saath kiya, uski bharpai hum kaise karte. Aur hamein poora vishwas hai ki aap is bachche ko dil se apna lenge. Aakhir woh aapke bhai ka hi to…”
“Ek minute Dadi Ma,” Maan was almost disgusted at this interpretation of his relationship with Geet. But he controlled himself because of his respect for Dadi Ma, “Mujhe aise kaam ke liye thanks mat kahiye jo maine kiya hi nahin hai.”
“Kya matlab?”
“Dadi Ma. Main Geet se isliye shaadi nahin kar raha ki jo gunah Dev ne uske saath kiya uski bharpai kar sakoon. Maine Geet ko sirf aur sirf isliye apnaya hai kyonki main usse bahut pyaar karta hoon. Par aapne ye sahi kaha – maine us bachche ko sachche dil se apna liya hai. Lekin isliye nahin ki woh mere bhai bachcha hai. Balki Isliye ki woh Geet ka bachcha hai. Aur isliye woh mera bhi hai – hamara bachcha hai. Aur Dev ka to naam bhi main uske saath nahin lena chahta. Main nahin maanta ki Dev ka us bachche se koi lena dena hai ya uske oopar koi haq hai. Ye baat kam-se-kam aapko pata honi zaroori hai Dadi Ma.”
Dadi looked surprised. Maan looked at her and realized that he needs to explain more, “Dadi Ma. Shayad aapko ye lag raha hai ki sagai waali raat se pahle mujhe pata nahin tha ki Geet pregnant hai?”
“Aapko pata tha?”
“Dadi Ma! Aapko lagta hai ki Geet itni badi baat mujhse chhupati? Geet aisi nahin hai Dadi Ma. Woh kabhi jhooth nahin bol sakti, sach nahin chhipa sakti. Mujhe pata tha ”
“Lekin unhone mujhe to kabhi nahin bataya?”
“Woh mera faisla tha.”
“Aapko nahin laga ki sagai ke pahle aapko itni badi baat mujhe batani chahiye thi?”
“Dadi Ma. Main maanta hoon, lekin main sahi mauke ki talash mein tha, jab aapko sab kuchh samjha sakoon. Main nahin chahta tha ki ye baat is tarah se aapke saamne aaye ki aap bewajah Geet ke khilaaf ho jayen.”
“To aapko pata tha Geet ke pregnant hone ki baare mein, aap ye nahin jaante the ki kasoorwar Dev hai aur phir bhi aapne Geet ko apnane ka faisla kar liya Maan? Aapko itna wishwas tha un par?”
“Sach to ye hai ki maine poori baat sune bina Geet ko galat samjha tha, bahut galat samjha tha. Apni is galti ke karan main almost use kho baitha tha Dadi Ma,” Maan’s voice reflected the sadness and fear at the mere thought of losing Geet, “Agar sach much Geet us waqt mujhse door chali jaati to pata nahin kya hota? Us par bharosa na karne ke liye main apne aap ko kabhi maaf nahin kar pata. Aur meri khushiyan? Woh to uske saath hi hamesha ke liye chali jaati.”
Suddenly Maan came to his senses. He had opened up too much in front of Dadi Ma and he would not feel comfortable about it later on.
“Khair Dadi Ma. Ab main un sab baaton ko yaad nahin karna chahta. Hum us mod se bahut aage nikal chuke hain.”
“Theek hai beta. Hum bhi buri yaadon ko nahin kuredna chahte the. Bas aapki khushi aapko mil gayi, aap muskurate rahein, isse zyada hamein kuchh nahin chahiye.”
“Thank you Dadi Ma,” Maan finally smiled to convince her of his happiness.
Dadi smiled back too, “Theek hai beta. Aap aaraam kar lijiye, hum abhi chalte hain.”
—
Geet was finally left alone for sometime after conitnuously being busy with one ritual or the other. Maan had been checking on her since the morning, but she hadn’t seen him in last one hour or so. She grew eager to see him and decided to sneak into his room, hoping that he would be there. But she had just reached his door, when she heard Dadi Ma thanking him for accepting Geet and her child. She could not resist overhearing the rest of the conversation.
By the time Dadi left, she had tears in her eyes. Although tears were not for herself, she did not want to alarm Maan. So, she decided not to meet him then. Dadi, thankfully, had not see her while leaving.
—
As soon as Dadi left, Maan once again grew restless thinking about Geet. He decided to go to her room and see her once.
He saw Geet in tears as soon as he stepped out of his room. He assumed that she must be feeling bad because of what Dadi said. He did not ask her anything there. He brought her in the room.
“Geet tum Dadi Ma ki baaton ki wajah se pareshaan…”
Geet silienced him by putting her hand on his lips, “Main apne liye pareshaan nahin hoon Maan. Maine to jab Dadi Ma ko aapko thanks kahte suna, to mujhe aapke liye bura laga. Log aapke pyaar ko shayad samajh nahin paayenge. Mujhe bura laga ki Dadi Ma bhi aapko nahin samajh payi.”
“Geet!” Maan was genuinely surprised at how she was thinking.
“Haan. Aur aap to kabhi kissi ke saamne apni feelings batayenge bhi nahin. Mujhe bhi kabhi duniya ko nahin batane denge ki aapke dil mein kitna pyaar hai, kitni hamdardi hai.”
“Geet. Agar ye baat hai to tumhein pareshaan hone ki koi zaroorat nahin hai. Duniya mere baare mein kya sochti hai, isse mujhe koi farq nahin padta aur tumhein bhi nahin padna chahiye. Duniya ko nahin pata hai ki main tumhein lekar kya mahsoos karta hoon, kyonki main kissi ko batana chahta hi nahin hoon. Tum samajhti ho na Geet. Bas itna hi chahiye mujhe. In fact, main Dadi Ma ko bhi kuchh explain nahin karta. Lekin unke liye ye samajhna zaroori tha ki main Dev aur uske gunahon ke baare mein kya sochta hoon. Bas isliye maine unhein poori baat batayi.”
Geet had nothing left to say. She just hugged him to convey her agreement and support for whatever he wanted to do.
Geet decided to leave after sometime, “Main jaati hoon. Shayad Dadi Ma, mujhe baaki rasmon ke liye dhoondhti hui aa jayen.”
Maan held her hand, “Bas ek din ki baat hai Geet jo main tumhein kissi bhi wajah se jaane de raha hoon. Kal se…”
He intentionally left his sentence incomplete and it had the desired effect on Geet. She smiled and blushed heavily, before she turned around and left.
As Maan looked on, a smile of happiness and contentment formed on his lips too.
Completing the Show
Note on the OS
This is supposed to happen immediately after Maan and Geet’s consummation.
—
Maan was happy and peaceful. Geet was lying in his arms. She belonged to him in every sense of the word now. Emotionally and physically. For the world, for herself, for him. They were both staring at the ceiling, but they could feel the love, desire and peace each of them was radiating. There was no place for words or conversation in their world right now.
Maan turned towards her, wanting to kiss her once again. He could not have enough of her. How much had he desired her all these days! How much had he waited for this day to come! But he stopped when he noticed the look on her face. She wasn’t sad, but she was lost. She was not here, not with him.
“Geet,” he called her name softly.
She came out of her thoughts, smiled at him, bold and shy at the same time. She snuggled up closer to him. He reciprocated by tightening his grip around her.
“Kya soch rahi thi Geet?”
“Kuchh nahin.”
“Kuchh to tha.”
“Arre. App kyon bekaar mein zidd kar rahe hain? Sach mein kuchh nahin. Aur agar kuchh soch bhi rahi thi to aapke munh se apna naam sun kar bhool gayi.”
He thought of giving up. It couldn’t be anything significant. But suddenly a stubbornness took over him. Not any longer, she could not keep anything from him any longer. He had to know everything about her, even every single thought that crossed her mind. She was his. Was he obsessing over her? Like hell he was. But it didn’t matter. He was with Geet, his Geet and if he felt like obsessing over her, so it will be.
He turned a bit towards Geet, while still keeping his arms around her. He had a stern look in his eye, “Geet. Tum ise meri zidd bhi samajh sakti ho aur mera pagalpan bhi. In fact main hoon pagal tumhare liye. Hamare beech kissi bhi parde, kissi bhi diwar ko to main pahle bhi nahin maanta tha. Lekin ab to tum bhi hamare beech koi parda nahin rakh sakti. Main rakhne nahin doonga Geet. Samjhi tum? Ab tum kissi bhi bahane se mujhe khud se door nahin rakh sakti. Roshni mein main tumhara saya ban kar, aur andhere mein tumhare liye diya ban kar tumhare saath har pal rahunga. Tumhari har baat mujhe maaloon honi chahiye Geet. Jo bhi tum karti ho, jo bhi tum sochti ho…”
Maan’s eyes had an intensity that would have scared anyone else. But she was his Geet. She could not only tolerate his extreme passion and possessiveness, but also enjoy it. What would have threatened to destroy somebody else’s individuality, helped her define hers.
“Maan. Aap aisi baatein kyon kar rahe hain? Aapko aisa kyon lagta hai ki main hamare beech koi parda rakhna chahti hoon?”
“To phir tum mujhe bata kyon nahin rahi Geet ki tum abhi kya soch rahi thi?”
She looked worried for a second before she started smiling again. But that one second could not escape Maan’s notice.
“Koi khaas baat thi hi nahin Maan. Main bas shaadi ki sab baatein yaad kar rahi thi. Rasm-riwaz, sab log, parties…”
“Tumhein ab bhi lagta hai ki tum mujhse jhooth bol sakti ho Geet?”
Of course, she did not think so. She knew better. Why did she even try?
“Maan!” She was perplexed.
“Batao Geet. Jo bhi baat thi mujhe bata do. Jhijhakne ki koi zaroorat nahin hai.”
“Aap mujh par gussa to nahin karenge.”
“Agar gussa karne waali baat hogi to shayad gussa to aa hi jayega. Lekin tum mere gusse se kab se darne lagi?”
“Aap se door hone se dar lagta hai.”
“To phir darne ki koi zaroorat nahin hai. Tumse door hona mere wash ki baat nahin hai, chahe kuchh bhi ho jaye.”
“Maan, agar aap pahle bhi, mera matlab hai shaadi ke pahle bhi, mere kareeb aana chahte to main aapko nahin rokti.”
“Mujhe pata hai.”
“Haan, lekin aapne kabhi aisa kiya nahin. Mujhe kabhi kabhi dar lagta tha.”
“Dar?” Maan was genuinely surprised.
From here on, she uttered each and every word with lots of hesitation. Someone other than Maan might not even have been able to make out what she was saying. “Woh… Mujhe… Mujhe pata hai ye meri bewkoofi thi, lekin mujhe dar lagta tha… ki kahin… aap… mere kareeb nahin aana chahte mere… ateet ki wajah se.”
She spoke the last four words in one breath, sat up on the bed and started looking down as she was finding it hard to meet his eyes.
“Kya?” Maan was hurt and it showed on his face. But Geet was no longer looking at him. He, too, sat up.
Then he collected himself. Getting hurt would not be the correct response. He knew very well that she never distrusted him. In fact she trusted him more than one trusts even the laws of nature.
“Geet, Meri taraf dekho,” he lifted her chin.
“Maan, mujhe pata hai meri bewkoofi thi. Aapne zidd ki, is liye maine ye baat aapko bata di. Ab to in sabka koi matlab bhi nahin hai. Please aap bura mat maaniyega. Mujhse naraaz mat…”
“Chup. Bilkul chup,” he put his hands on her lips. He was pained to see tears in her eyes. Before talking anything further, he went ahead and hugged her. The hug had its desired effect on her, and she calmed down.
He broke the hug and cupped her face with his hands.
He teased her with a smile, “Geet. To tum itni bechain thi mere paas aane ki liye?”
“Nahin… Woh… Mera matlab…” Geet grew embarrassed and stuttered her meaningless response, “Main abhi aati hoon.”
She started getting down from the bed. Maan pulled her back and she fell on top of him as he fell back on the bed. He immediately trapped her in his arms and did not let her move away. She buried her head in his chest, as she was still too embarrassed to look at him and this was the bes she could do in his tight grip.
“Geet. Ab to ye explain karna zaroori hai ki main tumhare kareeb kyon nahin aaya pahle,” Maan said.
“Nahin. Aapko kuchh bhi explain karne ki zaroorat nahin hai. Ye meri bewkoofi thi. Mujhe aap par poora bharosa hai,” Geet replied, still lying on his chest.
“Aur mujhe tumhare bharose par poora bharosa hai Geet. Lekin mujhe lagta hai tumhein pata hona chahiye.”
He loosened his grip and they sat up on the bed once again. He held her hands, “Tumhein lagta hai ki main tumahre paas aane ke liye, tumhein apna banane ki liye bechain nahin tha? Geet. Agar maine sirf apne dil ki suni hoti to pata nahin kab ka tumhein apne saath apne ghar le aaya hota. Jo thodi si bhi dooriyan hamare beech thi, unhein sahna mere liye bahut mushkil tha Geet. Aur mujhe pata tha ki tum mujh par atoot bharosa karti ho. Lekin main ye bhi jaanta tha Geet ki tumne zindagi mein bahut dhokhe khaye hain. Isliye main tumhare bharose ka imtihaan nahin lena chahta tha. Bas itni si baat thi Geet.”
Geet was overwhelmed once again by her man, “Mujhe to ab ashcharya bhi nahin hota aapke munh se aisi baatein sun kar. Mujhe to pahle hi pata hona chahiye tha ki aap jo bhi karte hain, mere liye karte hain; jab bhi sochte hain, mere baare mein sochte hain; jo bhi chahte hain, bas mere liye chahte hain.”
“Haan Geet. Kyonki jo bhi tumhara hota hai, woh mera bhi to ho jaata hai na. Khushi, gham, hansi, aansoo, sab kuchh.”
They hugged once again.
“Lekin ab jab mujhe ye pata chal gaya hai ki tum kitna ulta-seedha soch rahi thi to mera tum par se bharosa uth gaya hai,” Maan was playful, but Geet got worried.
She broke the hug, “Bharosa uth gaya?”
“Haan. Mujhe pahle lagta tha ki tumhara shareer hi gidta-padta rahta hai. To mujhe tumhein sambhalne ke liye har samay tumhare paas rahna chahiye. Lekin ab pata chal gaya hai ki tum apne dimaag ko bhi sambhaal ke nahin rakh sakti. Woh bhi idhar udhar gidta-padta rahta hai. Isliye tumhare liye kuchh strict rules banane padenge.”
“Maan!” Geet faked anger and made a cute face.
“Haan Geet. Main serious hoon. Aaj ke baad tumhare dimaag mein kuchh bhi aaye, kuchh bhi, chahe woh kitna hi ajeeb kyon na lage tumhein, tum turat mujhe bataogi. Samjhi tum.”
Geet nodded.
“Ye baat kabhi bhoolna mat. Aur yaad rakhna ki main har waqt tumahre saath hoon ab, aur koi bhi parda ya diwaar hamare beech rahne nahin doonga.”
“Ji.” Geet made the face of a kid who had been reprimanded.
“Waise Geet. Tumne ek kaam aduhra chhoda hua hai, woh bhi tumhein aaj hi khatam karna hai.”
“Kaam? Aaj?” Geet couldn’t believe that he had suddenly changed the topic to work. Only Maan could do that. She looked up hoping to get some clarification from Babaji about her unpredictable husband and boss.
“Haan.” He took out a sheet from the drawer of the side table and handed it to her.
Geet became even more confused as she saw the sheet. She had prepared a sheet with instructions on the day she had decorated his bathroom with candles and rose petals. It was an effort to break a promise he had made in his anger that he would not touch her till their wedding. She had even worn a short, red dress to seduce him into touching her. But her plan had backfired badly. It was the same sheet he handed over to her.
She looked at him in confusion and embarrassment.
“Ek show poora dekhna hai Geet.”
“Lekin ye to… woh aapki kasam… ”
“Meri kasam todne ke liye kiya tha tumne. To?”
“Lekin aapko to ye sab achcha nahin laga tha.”
“Aisa kyon laga tumhein?”
“Aap to mera mazaak bana rahe the. Aur aapne apni kasam bhi nahin todi thi.”
Oh! His lovely, innocent wife. He could not help laughing slightly at her simplicity. Geet did not know how to react to it. Seeing him laugh was a rare sight even when he was in her company. She mostly had to be content with his smile. Others did not get even that.
Then he went back to smiling again as he asked her, “To tumhein lagta hai ki maine tumhein us din isliye nahin chhua kyonki main apni kasam nahin todna chahta tha aur tum achchhi nahin lag rahi thi?”
She didn’t say anything, just nodded innocently.
He pulled her closer to him and spoke in his heavy, seductive voice, “Geet. Phir to tumhari ek aur galatfahmi door karni hai. Us din tum itni achchhi lag rahi thi ki main pagal ho gaya tha. Agar maine tab tumhein chhua hota to main saari seemayen paar kar jaata. Par ab… Chalo, bathroom mein jao. Tumhein saari taiyaari dubara jo karni hai.”
Geet was blushing heavily as she heard him. Then got down from the bed to go to the bathroom. She had to awkwardly put a sheet around her as she realized that she was mostly naked.
The bathroom was already prepared the way she had done the last time. She only had to light the candles. Her red dress was hanging there for her to change in to. She went through the instructions on the sheet. She sprinkled some water on her face and hair and blushed again.
She was sitting on the edge of the bath-tub when Maan entered. He had changed in to the same set of clothes he was wearing then. Geet’s heartbeat increased with excitement as well as apprehension at what was to come next.
Maan slowly walked up to her, made her stand up and said, “Tum mere bathroom mein kya kar rahi ho?”
Geet looked at him not knowing what to say.
“Aaj main tumse ye nahin poochhoonga.” Maan added.
Geet shivered looking at the naughty smile on his lips.
Relations
She hadn’t dwelt on it. It was just a moment, when she said, “Abhi Maa hoti to main unse poochh leti.” She was sifting through jewelry samples Dadi Ma had ordered and had asked her to choose from. For their wedding
But it struck him as he overheard her. Did she often have these moments, which she did not share with him? Because she did not want him to worry? He didn’t have any respect for her family members given the way they had treated her. And he knew that she was strong and believed in living her life, even when her dear ones betrayed her. She had moved on and lived without the protection of her family. But at the end of the day, she was still an eighteen year old. Wouldn’t it be too harsh to expect her not to crave for the company of her family, at least her parents, her mother? Especially on such an important occasion of her life, her wedding?
But all these were merely his speculations. He wasn’t sure what he should do. He could try and contact her parents. Possibly on hearing the news of her marriage, they would feel good for her and agree to come. But would that be the right thing to do? Would it bring back good memories for her or the bad ones? It was too risky a decision. He would never want to kill her happiness, definitely not due to something that he was trying to make her smile.
There was only one option. Talk to her. But not immediately. It was a sensitive issue and he wanted to think through his words. He wasn’t good with words. He should not hurt her even by mistake.
For now, he would just pull his usual tricks and make her smile.
“Geet.”
“Aap? Aap yahan kya kar rahe hain?” She startled as if caught in an act.
“Ek client se meeting karne ke liye aaya hoon,” he mocked her.
“Client se meeting? Yahan? Lekin neeche office mein to sab shaadi ka samaan pada hai. Aap mujhe pahle nahin bata sakte the? Ab itni jaldi main office kaise theek karoongi?”
His smile broadened as he heard her blabbering. She suddenly noticed him smile.
“Aap mujhe buddhu bana rahe hain?”
“Banane ki kya zaroorat hai Geet?”
“Kya?” Her eyes widened at the insult, “Aap apne aap ko samajhte kya hain? Vikram aur Betal ke Vikram? Yahan kya karne aaye hain aap?”
“To mujhe tumhein ye batane ki zaroorat padegi ki main apni hone waali biwi ke kamre mein kya kar raha hoon. Haan Geet? Ye bewkoofi nahin to aur kya hai?”
He started moving towards her with his seductive look in his eyes and she started moving backwards, until she hit the bed and ended up sitting on it. He leaned, bringing his face close to hers and placed his hands on her sides on the bed. He picked up the necklace lying on her left, while he continued to look into her eyes. She did not notice the necklace, until he started putting it on her over her head. She became confused, while his hands moved to the back of her neck. She closed her eyes as his touch affected her. He pulled the strings and the necklace fitted on her neck. He ran his hands around her neck to bring them in front and caressed the necklace, “Ye perfect lag raha hai.”
She opened her eyes. Confusion still reigned on her face and in her voice, “Aap…”
“… apni mishti ke liye gahne select karne aaya tha. Kaisi lagi meri pasand?”
He cupped her face and she stood up when he gestured her to.
“Bahut achchhi hai.”
“Tumne to dekha bhi nahin hai ki maine kya chuna hai. Tab se mujhe hi nihar rahi ho.”
“Aapne chuna hai to phir mujhe dekhne aur sochne ki kya zaroorat hai?”
He smiled and just as he was moving to kiss her, they heard footsteps outside and separated awkwardly. Dadi Ma had come.
She noticed the necklace Geet was wearing and remarked, “Are wah Geet! Ye necklace to aap par bahut janch raha hai. Badi achchhi pasand hai aapki.”
Maan and Geet exchanged a quick, stealth smile and they proceeded to discuss the mandap designs with Dadi Ma.
—
They had sneaked out on the terrace after dinner. Geet was sitting on the swing, blabbering away about something or the other, when Maan suddenly interrupted her, “Geet mujhe tumse kuchh baat karni thi.”
“To boliye na..”
“Geet – kuchh serious baat hai, aur…”
He appeared to be struggling to choose his words and Geet got worried. The last time she had seen him hesitate so much was when he was trying to ask her about Dev, whether he should look for her culprit and bring him to justice. What was it this time?
“Aap itna hichak kyon rahe hain? Aisi kya baat hai. Please mujhe jaldi bataiye.”
“Geet tum gussa mat hona, bas mere dimaag mein baat aayi, isliye poochh raha hoon.”
“Aap please paheliyan bujha kar mujhe pareshaan mat kijiye. Aisi koi baat nahin ho sakti jo aap mujhse nahin kah sakte Maan. Please bataiye.”
“Geet, kya tum apne parents ko miss kar rahi ho? Kya tum chahti ho ki woh hamari shaadi attend karein?”
Geet was too shocked to react for few moments.
Even after she recovered, she wasn’t sure why he asked that question.
“Aap ye kyon poochh rahe hain? Kya aapko lagta hai ki log mere ghar waalon ke baare mein sawaal poochhenge?”
“Nahin, nahin Geet. Tum achchhi tarah se jaanti ho ki logon ki mujhe koi parwah nahin hai. Main to bas tumhari khushi ke liye jaanna chahta tha Geet. Agar apni shaadi par tum apne parents ka saath chahti ho, to main kuchh bhi kar ke unhein launga. Lekin agar ismein tumhari khushi hogi, tabhi.”
Geet was overwhelmed once again at her man’s concern for her happiness. She knew how much he detested her family. And how unfair they had been not only to her, but to him as well. He was still willing to go after them for her happiness.
“Maan! Rishte khoon se nahin bante, nibhane se bante hain. Aapne ek pita ki tarah meri hamesha raksha ki hai. Jab bhi main pareshaan aur udaas hui, ek maa ke tarah aapne mujhe shaant karaya hai, mujhe bharosa diya hai. Bhai-bahnon ki tarah aap mere saath hanste-khelte hain, jhagadte hain, mujhe chhedte hain, mujhe hansate hain. Aur ek sachche jeevan-saathi ki tarah har kadam par mere saath rahte hain. Mere saare rishte aap par shuru hote hain, aur aap par hi khatam hote hain Maan. Mujhe kissi aur ki zaroorat nahin hai. Mujhe apni khushiyan kissi aur ke saath nahin baantni hain.”
It was Maan’s turn to be overwhelmed.
“Geet!” He could not say anything else.
Geet nodded her head slightly, as if to confirm all that she had said just now. Then she got up from the swing and Maan pulled her into a hug.
He decided to lighten the mood, “Waise Geet. Tum itni badi badi baatein karna kaise seekh gayi. Tum meri nakal kar ke practice to nahin karti rahti?”
Geet broke the embrace slightly, pretended to be angry and hit him on his shoulder. They started smiling and hugged again.
—
Note on the OS
I am aware that some people may not agree to the viewpoint presented in this story. The most common argument being that ‘parents are parents and how can she not wish to see her parents on her wedding day?’ But I have a strong opinion to the contrary.
To illustrate my idea, let me present an example from the serial itself. Do we think of Dev as the father of Geet’s child? Almost everyone in love with the serial does not. Most of us accept Maan as the father. Why? Dev is the one biologically responsible for the baby. But he did not carry out his responsibilities of protecting and loving the baby. Maan did. He protected the baby and loved it as his own. So, its Maan and not Dev who is the father of the baby.
To me, Geet’s parents and Dev are similar. Both have been spineless for their child. Both of them could not protect their child. The only difference is the Geet has lived with her parents for 18 years and of course, there have been moments of love and affection. But even during those years they had not been able to do anything to protect her from the ridicilous rules and punishments decided by Daarji. Those who have seen the initial episodes would know how torturous all of that was.
Given that they have royally failed in their basic duty as the parents, I have no sympathy for any affection between them and Geet. Check out Stockholm Syndrome. Even the captives end up developing positive feelings for their captors. It may sound harsh, but I treat this affection as closer to Stockhold Syndrome. She has been with them for 18 years, but that’s it. After that they left her to die and could do nothing for her. They might as well have killed her, when she was born.
So, I never accepted Geet’s family or parents returning to share her happiness in the wedding. (Especially not Daarju, who according to me is the biggest villain in the show.) They have no rights over Geet’s happiness. Only Maan has that right. He is the only family she has.
Making Up
Note on the OS
In one of the episodes before their wedding, Maan was troubling Geet by holding her hands under the dining table, forcing her to eat with her left hand. Dadi Ma and Annie noticed it and it created an embarrassing situation for Geet. Maan was enjoying teasing her and added more to her discomfort by asking her to serve him rice. She warned him, but when he did not let go, she exposed him in front of Dadi Ma and Annie. When they realized that Maan had been holding her hands, they teased him a lot and this made Maan angry at Geet. He scolded her for exposing their private life in front of others. He thought she did not want him to touch her and hence decided that he would not touch her until the wedding.
I felt very bad for Geet after that episode and wrote this OS. In the show they hand handled it differently by turning it in to a funny challenge. My take is more emotional.
—
What had she done? She hurt him? His pride? His prestige?
Yes – it was not intentional, but she still ended up doing it. How could this happen, when she claims to know him so well; when he himself has this faith on her that she knows him more than he knows himself?
At that moment, it did not matter to her that the whole incident was triggered because of his prank. He was the one who was embarrassing her by holding her hand under the dining table. But when she exposed him, the situation went out of her hands. He could not take all the leg pulling. And then in the office. She was hurting badly when he was telling her all that. That she needs to keep their private moments private.
But right now, it wasn’t her self-respect or hurt that mattered. How could it? He was the person who taught her how to live with self-respect. He was the one who healed all her hurt. And she had hurt him. He had put up with so much for her. He had put up with all her naivety and mistakes and still loved her to death. How far she must have gone this time that he was hurt by her behaviour?
That was the only thing that mattered. He was hurt. How could she make amends? He was so angry, that she did not have the courage to go and say ‘Sorry’. What if a ‘Sorry’ was inadequate!
—
As he sat in his cabin alone for a while, his anger started to cool off. And that’s when he realized what he had done.
Why did he talk to her like that? Couldn’t he see the hurt in her eyes, when he told her that he would not even touch her. And when he told her that he would no longer listen to her. And when he shouted at her in the office.
This was the woman who had taught him how to smile, how to let go of worries. How could he rob her of her smile! The smile that she managed to keep even when she was going through the hell in her life, through the death threats by her own family, through the social stigma of becoming a single mother, through the days of financial insecurities, through all her loneliness. And he robbed her of that smile, which had sustained her all her life. And which now sustained him too.
This was the woman who trusted him blindly. She even waited for the snow in Delhi, because he asked her to. Why did he have to be so harsh with her? What had come upon him? If he wanted her to behave differently all he had to do was ask her. Yes, she blabbered non-stop in front of him, she fought with him in a way nobody dared to, she made fun of him, but none of it came in the way of her true feelings for him. The true feelings, with which she practically worshipped him. Did she ever really say “No” to anything he asked her for? She did not. She could not! What should he do? Go to her cabin and say ‘Sorry’? What if a ‘Sorry’ was inadequate?
—
He could not decide what to do. The day was filled with meetings, because he wanted to finish off as much work as possible before they took leave for their wedding. Meetings that she scheduled because he had asked her to. Even this simple thought made his heart ache. He only had to ask her. Why did he shout at her and utter those hurtful words!
The last meeting ran till 7 pm. He came back hurriedly from the conference room. He would take her home and talk to her. Do whatever he can to heal her wounds. But she was not in the cabin. Pinki was still there, packing her things up to leave for the day. He asked her. Geet had left at 6 pm. She looked unwell, but she did not say anything when Pinki asked her.
Unwell? Maan almost cried. What happened? Why did she not tell him?
—
She was facing away from the door, leaning on the rod of the bed. He could hear muffled sounds while standing at the door. What was she doing?
He tip-toed to go and face her. She did not realize he was there. What he saw there broke his heart. Her eyes were closed, as if she was trying to control her tears. But they were uncontrollable. They were flowing through her closed eyes. She was biting her lips to not let a sound escape. But he still had been able to hear them at the door itself.
His hands naturally moved to wipe her tears. But he suddenly remembered what he had said in the morning. He will not touch her till their wedding. Not that he cared about that any longer. But he wasn’t sure what she thought of it. How will she take it if he touched her? It took him all his self-control, but he decided to hold back for the time being.
Then he slowly called her, “Geet!”
He could see surprise on her crying face. She did not open her eyes immediately. She wiped her tears with her fingers. And then opened her eyes. She was still biting her lips.
He had to read her lips as she tried to say, “Aap?” She had such a heavy throat due to her crying that the voice did not come out.
He looked around and found a jug of water on the side-table. He poured her a glass of water. She took the glass from him, but did not drink. She kept looking at him with eyes whose expressions killed him. Why was she looking so guilty? He was the one who should be guilty?
“Geet! Pinki ne kaha ki tumhari tabiyat theek nahin hai. Kya hua Geet?”
She drank the water now to find her voice back.
“Nahin. Maine to aisa kuchh nahin kaha tha use. Main bilkul theek hoon. Koi ghabrane ki baat nahin hai.”
‘Woh itna gussa hain. Phir bhi meri tabiyat kharab hone ke dar se bhagte chale aaye,’ she thought and felt even worse.
“Kya aap mujhe maaf kar sakte hain?”
“Geet…” Maan grew emotional.
“Mujhe pata hai, mujhse bahut badee galti ho gayi hai. Lekin mera yakeen maaniye, main aapki insult karne ki soch bhi nahin sakti. Ek baar maine aapko galat samajha tha Maan, aur uske liye main itna pachhtayi hoon ki galti se bhi aapki baaton ko mana nahin kar sakti. Please mujhe maaf kar dijiye. Maine anjaane mein aapka dil dukha diya.”
Maan’s guilt increased a thousand folds as he heard her repeating what he already knew. She would always do what he asked her to.
“Chup Geet. Bilkul chup,” he had said this so many times earlier. But this time he did not put his hands on her lips with authority. His own words, uttered that morning, had come back to bite him.
“Geet. Tum please apne aap ko zimmedar thahrana band karo. Galti meri thi Geet. Mujhe tumhare oopar gussa nahin karna chahiye tha. Main bhi to jaanta hoon ki tum meri har baat maanti ho, mujhe tum par chillane ki koi zaroorat nahin hai. Main gusse mein apna aapa kho baitha Geet. Subah bhi meri hi galti thi. Mujhe tumhein sab ke saamne pareshaan nahin karna chahiye tha. Main sirf tumhein lekar hi possessive nahin hoon Geet. Main apni is chhoti si duniya ko lekar bhi bahut possessive hoon, jo sirf hum dono ki hai. Ye main kissi ke saath share nahin kar sakta. Lekin in sabke beech maine tumhein bahut pareshaan kiya Geet, aur woh bhi bewajah. I am sorry. Please mujhe maaf kar do.”
That was it. Everything was resolved between them. This was how it was meant to be. She moved towards him, but suddenly stopped. His words in the morning… Did he still mean them? He saw her hesitation and spread his arms inviting her. She came to him immediately. As they stood there in each other’s arms, where they really belonged, a calmness descended upon them. The calmness that was theirs, but had eluded them the entire day, thanks to a silly fight.