Mish' Fiction

The unease Nidhi had felt during the picnic continued into the next week. Ashutosh avoided Nidhi’s company even in the evenings by telling her that he needed to meet Armaan. The couple of days they did spend together, Nidhi felt that he was avoiding any intimate talks with her, mostly balbbering on about inane stuff, asking about her family, discussing about hospital and… talking a lot about Rohan.

“Bahut funny hai Rohan, nahin?”

“Haan. Har cheez ka, har kissi ka mazaak banata rahta hai.”

“Tumne kabhi bataya nahin ki woh karta kya hai?”

“MBA kiya hai usne isi saal. HLL mein Marketing Trainee hai. Abhi finalize nahin hua hai woh kaun se office mein kaam karega. Isliye usne ghar nahin liya hai.”

“Chalo achchha hi hai. Tumhein bhi company mil jati hogi.”

“Ji?” Nidhi felt that his tone was not quite right, when he said that.

“Noodles khane ke liye,” Ashutosh laughed slightly.

It still didn’t feel like a joke to Nidhi, but she smiled.

“Achchha Nidhi. Mujhe All India Medical Convention ke keynote speech ke liye preparation karni hai. Din mein to time nahin mil paata. Tum aisa karo, ghar jao. Yahan bore ho jaogi.”

“Theek hai,” her mood was spoiled and she did not want to say anything to him in anger or frustration.

Rohan tried hard, but he could not cheer Nidhi up that night. Nor did she eat noodles with him.

—

It was 11.30 at night on the new year’s eve. Ashutosh was sitting in his office with lights off. His legs were perched up on the table, head was resting on the chair back and he had used his arms to cover his eyes, blocking even the little light that had made its way through the creeks.

He was startled when the lights of the room went on.

“Nidhi?” he stood up surprised.

“Aap surgery ke liye nahin gaye?”

“Woh. Actually postpone ho gayi kyonki…”

“To aapne mujhe bataya kyon nahin?”

“Nidhi. Mujhe laga ki tum logon ne already plan bana rakh hai. Kahin tum meri wajah se cancel na kar do.”

“Koi surgery planned nahin thi Dr. Ashutosh. Sonali ke patient ki surgery Christmas se pahle ho chuki hai.”

Ashutosh averted his eyes.

“Mujhe usi din laga tha ki aap… aap jhooth bol rahe hain. Lekin main… mujhe laga ki aap mujhse jhoothi nahin bol sakte. Aakhir baat kya hai? Aap kyon mujhe aise… avoid kar rahe hain?”

“Nahin Nidhi. Aisa nahin hai.”

“Phir jhooth? Aur aap pichhle hafte Dr. Armaan se shaam mein kabhi nahin mile hain?”

“Tumne Armaan se poochha?” Ashutosh asked guiltily.

“Main koi jaasoosi nahin kar rahi thi. Woh jab aapse milne kal hospital aaye the, tab baaton-baaton mein unhone kaha ki Christmas ke baad woh kal aapse pahli baar mil rahe the.”

Ashutosh was silent.

“Unhone ye bhi kaha ki aap bahut tense aur lost lag rahe the, which I agree to. Kya mujhe poochhne ka haq hai ki kya baat hai jo aapko itna pareshaan kar rahi hai?”

“Nidhi please. Aise mat baat karo. Of course, tumhein haq hai. Tumhein saare haq hain… Main to bas apne haq ke baare mein sure nahin hoon.”

“Kya matlab hai iska?”

“Nidhi. Main… Main tumhein khush nahin rakh sakta Nidhi. I am just too old for you. Tumhare pranks, tumhare games, tum mere saath kabhi enjoy nahin kar sakti. Jo lifestyle tumhein pasand hai, woh tum meri wajah se chhodne par majboor ho jati ho. Aur… Nidhi main tumhare liye sahi nahin hoon.

“Achanak aisa kyon…”

“Main ye sab cheezein bhool sa gaya tha. Tumhein le kar apne sapnon mein kho gaya tha. Lekin jab Rohan ke saath tumhari relationship dekhi to mujhe ahsaas hua ki woh natural hai. Hamari relationship nahin. Is relationship ne kahin tumhein baandh sa diya hai, aisa lagta hai. Iski wajah se tum apni zindagi khul kar nahin jee pa rahi ho. Main apne swarth ke liye tumhein, tumhare liye koi galat faisla nahin le sakta. And I think Rohan… Rohan is in love with you.”

“Aur isliye aapne hamara rishta todne ka faisla le liya?” Nidhi asked with restraint in her voice.

“Main tumhein aazaad karna chahta hoon Nidhi.”

“Aap mujhe aazaad karna chahte hain. Shayad Rohan mujhse pyaar karta hai. Lekin kya is wajah se aap dono mein se kissi ko bhi mujhse poochhe bina mere faisle lene ka haq mil jaata hai?”

“Nidhi?”

“Aap samajhte kya hain apne aap ko? Bahut bade doctor honge, bahut intelligent aur mature honge, lekin bhagwaan nahin hain aap. Main kya chahti hoon ya kya sochti hoon, ye decide karne se pahle mujhse confirm kar lein to behtar hoga. Samjhe aap?”

Ashutosh was stunned and just stared at her as she fired away at him.

“Waise meri aankhein khol di aapne. To aapke liye mera wajood mere pranks, mere games, meri partying aur mere friends se hai, right? Those are the things that make Nidhi Verma. Great. Aapne bhi usi Nidhi se pyaar kiya hai kya? Agar haan – to theek hi faisla liya aapne is rishte ko todne ka. Kyonki woh sab main nahin hoon Dr. Ashutosh. Samjhe aap? Main woh sab nahin hoon. Aapko agar mujhse door jaana hai to isliye jaiye ki aap aisa chahte hain. Don’t reduce me and my happiness to all that. Please. Don’t insult me like that.”

Nidhi’s strength gave way and she was about to break down. So, she ran out of the room.

Damn! What had he done? Ashutosh gathered himself together and tried to follow her. He could not see her in the corridor. But he knew where she would be.

—

He sat beside her on the dusty bench on the terrace. She was crying silently.

“Nidhi. Sorry is a small word. Too small a word. Isliye sorry kahne se pahle ek confession karna chahta hoon. Sunogi?”

“Boliye,” she was cross, but ready to listen.

“Nidhi. Tumhein le kar maine hamesha insecure feel kiya hai. Aur shayad zaroorat se zyada reponsible bhi. Mere man mein ye baat atki hui thi ki pata nahin tum apne liye sahi faisla kar payi ho ya nahin. Main tumse bada hoon. To maine tumhein sahi faisla lene diya hai ya nahin? Isliye pahle bhi apni feelings ka ehsaas hone ke baad bhi tumse door rahne ki koshish ki thi. Lekin tum kahan maanne waali thi. Pata nahin kis kone se udti hui titli ke tarah meri band zindagi mein aa gayi. I gave in Nidhi. The attraction was… is too strong to not give in. Lekin insecurities kahin gayi nahin thi. Aur pahla mauka milte hi they resurfaced. Insecurity, guilt, anger, hatred – ye aise emotions hote hain Nidhi ki insaan ki rationally sochne ki takat khatam kar dete hain. Aur main bhi… I am sorry. Pahle gusse aur nafrat mein, aur ab insecurities aur guilt mein, maine superficial cheezon ke liye tumhara dil dukhaya. Lekin nahin Nidhi. Tum mere liye bas koi pranks karne waali, games khelne waali ladki nahin ho. Tum mere liye meri zindagi ho. Tum woh ho jisne mujhe zindagi ke sabse important lessons sikhaye hain, hansne ki, khush rahne ki value sikhayi hai, nafrat ke pahle pyaar ko dekhna sikhaya hai.”

“Lekin aap mujh par bharosa nahin karte? Aapko laga ki main Rohan ke saath…”

“Nidhi. Agar main itni clearly sochta to ye bewkoofi nahin karta.”

“Question evade mat kijiye. Mujhe jawaab chahiye. Aaj Rohan hai. Kal koi aur hoga. Rohan ka to pata nahin, lekin ho sakta hai ki kal ko koi aur mujhse pyaar karne lage. To kya har baar aap aise hi hamare rishte par, meri fidelity par shaq karne lagenge.”

“Nahin Nidhi. Maine tum par shaq kabhi nahin kiya tha. Believe me. Mujhe bas itna laga ki agar Rohan jaisa koi ladka tumse pyaar karta hai to tumahre liye behtar kya hoga. Shayad woh.”

“Aur Rohan mujhse pyaar karta hai ye aapne kaise conclude kar liya?”

“Jis din tum dono ko pub se le kar aaya tha us din woh behoshi mein baar-baar bol raha tha. Aur waise bhi, it is obvious ki he is trying to get your attention.”

“Agar ye theek bhi hai to mera kya? Main Rohan ke saath hans-khel leti hoon, parties mein chali jaati hoon, isliye aapko laga ki main bhi usse…”

“Kabhi kabhi mujhe aisa bhi laga ki tum uske saath jitni comfortable ho, jitni baatein share kar sakti ho, mere saath nahin kar sakti.”

“Kyon?”

“Shayad meri bewkoofi thi.”

“Bataiye mujhe – aaj main koi evasion bardasht nahin karoogni.”

“Rohan tumhein kissi baat ko le kar chidha raha tha. Tum mujhe batate batate ruk gayin. Phir phone par bhi kuchh baat hui thi tumhari, tum gussa ho rahi thi, par poochhne par bhi tumne mujhe nahin bataya.”

Nidhi hit her forehead, “Rohan mujhe baar baar chidhata tha ki aapke saath rah kar main bore ho gayi hoon. Kuchh fun nahin karti hoon. Isi chakkar mein maine us din utna drink kar liya tha. Aur phone par bhi wahi bol raha tha to main use daant rahi thi. Maine aapko nahin bataya tha ki kahin aapke dimaag mein ideas na aane lagein. Aur pub waali baat par aap waise bhi gussa the. Mujhe dar lag raha tha. Lekin jis cheez se main bachne ki koshish kar rahi thi, wahi ho gaya.”

Ashutosh smiled in embarrassment as it became clear to him that he was reading too much into trivial things. He looked at his watch. It was exactly midnight.

“Happy New Year, Nidhi.”

“Khaak happy new year. Bahut achchhi shuruat ho rahi hai New Year ki meri. Aap chahte kya hain?”

“Sorry? Tumse maafi maangna chahta hoon. Ki bina wajah tumhara dil dukhaya.”

“Meri samajh mein nahin aata ki bachchi main hoon ya aap bachche hain? Agar aapke man mein koi baat aati hai to aap mujhse discuss nahin kar sakte? Bata nahin sakte mujhe? Bolna nahin aata aapko? Akele baith kar, man hi man, poori kahani banani zaroori hai?” Nidhi was still irritated.

Ashutosh gave a guilty and resigned look to Nidhi.

“Is that the sorry?” she asked with a pout.

“Yes. A big sorry and a promise to never ever do it again.”

“Lekin aapki is bachkani problem ki wajah se hamara new year eve to barbaad ho gaya na? Hum kissi achchhi jagah party karne ja sakte the na?” his childlike Nidhi was back. He knew how to make her happy!

“To chalo. Hum party karte hain. To make it up, I will throw a party. Just for you.” Ashutosh recalled the vintage wine Armaan and Grace had brought for him. It was the time to put it to use.

—

To be continued

“Hello. Nidhi. Kya kar rahi ho?” Ashutosh called up late at night.

“Noodles kha rahi hoon,” Nidhi replied with her mouth full of noodles.

“Kha rahi ho? Itni raat ko? Dinner nahin kiya tha?”

“Kiya tha na? Lekin uska midnight noodles se kya matlab hai?”

“Midnight noodles?” Ashutosh laughed, “Tumhein bhi bhagwaan ne single piece mein hi banaya hai Dr. Nidhi Verma.”

“Nahin. Double piece to banaya hai. Rohan bhi kha raha hai mere saath.”

“Achchha!”

“Haan. Aur maine kuchh nahin kiya. Ye pahle se uski aadat thi. To ab hum dono roz raat ko saath mein noodles khate hain. Are… Rohan… Mere hisse ka mat khaana.”

“Roz? Nidhi – this midnight eating is not a good idea… For health.”

“Arre Uski chinta mat kijiye. Jab se gas jalana seekha hai, main roz bana kar kha rahi hoon. Pichhle aath saalon se. Abhi tak to kuchh nahin hua.”

“Okay Baba. Theek hai. Tum khao aur Rohan se apna hissa zaroor wapas le lena. Good night.”

“Good night Dr. Ashutosh.”

“Nidhi. Not fair. Tumne hamara secret Dr. Ashutosh ke saath share kar diya,” Rohan complained.

“Shut up Rohan. Noodles do mujhe. Aur Dr. Ashutosh ke saath main sab kuchh share karti hoon.”

“Bahut pyaar karti ho unse?”

“Bahut hi zyada Rohan. Tum imagine nahin kar sakte jab tak tum khud kissi se itna pyaar nahin karne lagte.”

Rohan smiled with some skepticism that Nidhi didn’t notice, “Par sach sach batao. Thoda odd nahin hota tum logon ke beech? I mean age difference is not just a number. Thinking different hoti hai, interests different hote hain. Nahin?”

“Differences hain bhi aur nahin bhi. Ab I am sure Rohan ki tumhari tarah woh mere saath baith kar aadhi raat mein noodles nahin khayenge. Lekin mujhe rokenge bhi nahin. Aur phir hamara past connection hai Rohan. To hamare bahut saare shauk milte hain. Tum ghazhalein sunte ho?”

“No way! Ek to samajh mein nahin aati hain. Aur doosre music bhi bahut boring hota hai.”

Nidhi smiled, “Main bhi sunti hoon aur Dr. Ashutosh bhi.”

“He is a lucky man!” Rohan rued. Nidhi didn’t pay attention as she was busy slurping her noodles and thinking about Ashutosh.

—

“Nidhi. Raat mein noodles ke chakkar mein main tumhein batana bhool gaya. Sandeep is taking Mallika back to Delhi with him. She is stable for now. Uska treatment aage wahin hoga.”

“That’s good news. I hope she recovers.”

“Yeah.”

Just then Nidhi’s phone rang.

“Hi Rohan…. Umm… Ek minute… Dr. Ashutosh. Rohan shaam mein pub jaane ko kah raha hai. Aap chalenge?”

“Nahin Nidhi. Tum jaanti ho main nahin jaata. Lekin tum jao.”

“Sure?”

“Yes.”

“Haan… Rohan. Dr. Ashutsoh to nahin aayenge. Par main chaloongi… Nahin. Main ghar jaungi. Change karna hoga. Shaam ko milte hain. Bye.”

“Ja rahi ho. But remember not to drink too much,” Ashutosh told her.

“Yes Boss!” Nidhi smiled and left to go to the ward.

—

Ashutosh waited till late for Nidhi to come back from the pub and call him. When she didn’t, he decided to call her himself. But his calls went unanswered repeatedly. He got worried. It was past midnight. Just then he got a call from Baba.

“Ashutosh. Nidhi tumhare saath hai kya?”

“Nahin Baba. Woh to Rohan ke saath…”

“Haan. Lekin dono abhi tak laute nahin hain. Aur phone bhi nahin utha rahe hain.”

“Oh! Aap chinta mat kijiye. Main ja kar dekhta hoon. Ho sakta hai unhein time ka dhyaan nahin raha ho. Aur music mein phone sunayi na de raha ho. Main aapko phone karta hoon.”

Ashutosh reached the pub and looked for Nidhi and Rohan. He found them sitting on a small table, pitch drunk. There were uncountable number of empty tequilla shot glasses on the table. When he reached closer, he found both of them totally out of their mind.

“Main jeet gaya Nidhi…” Rohan was blabbering.

“Main jeeti Rohan….”

“Kya kar rahe hain aap log?” Ashutosh asked sharply. Nidhi saw him and tried to get up, but she stumbled. Ashutosh made her sit again, “Dr. Ashutosh… Rohan… is wrong… I swear… he is…”

“Yes I know,” Ashutosh mumbled angrily. What was he to do with these two now? If he dropped them home, Baba would be scandalized. Finally he decided to take them to his home. He paid their bill and one by one led them out into his car. At home, with Kaka’s help, he put them to bed.

—

Nidhi woke up in the morning, feeling sick and groggy. She looked around confused and found Ashutosh in the room, sitting on a chair and reading the morning newspaper.

“Dr. Ashutosh?” she was surprised.

He looked at her angrily and said, “Neembu pani rakha hai side table par. Pee lo.”

It took her a few moments to comprehend where she was, “Oh God! Main yahan hoon… Baba ko…”

“Bata diya hai unhein maine. Drink it, freshen up and come to my room.”

“Ji,” she said sheepishly.

—

“Kya kar rahi thi tum kal raat?” Ashutosh fired at her as soon as she entered his room.

“Woh… Rohan mujhe chidha raha tha… To hamara competition chaloo ho gaya…”

“Shut up Nidhi. Ye kaisa excuse hai? Agar main wahan nahin pahunchta to kya hota? Tum dono mein se kaun drive karne ka plan bana raha tha? Tumhein pata hai ki Baba kitne worried the.”

“I am sorry,” Nidhi was already embarrassed, “Baba ko pata hai?”

“Nahin. Unhein maine sirf ye kaha hai ki tum log party ke baad idhar aa gaye ho aur raat mein yahin rukoge. Lekin sorry is not enough Dr. Nidhi Verma. Main tumhein mature samajhta tha. But last night was too much.”

Nidhi didn’t say anything and Ashutosh was unable to contain his anger, “I am telling you Nidhi. Agar dubara aisa hua to Baba kuchh kahein na kahein, I will ground you. Kahin nahin jaane doonga tumhein. Samjhi?”

“Ji,” her resigned and close-to-tears face softened Ashutosh. She wasn’t replying back to him. She was obviously sorry for what had happened.

“Look Nidhi. Tuhein shayad bura lag raha hoga ki main… tumse aise… baat kar raha hoon. But you know that I am right.”

“I know. I am really sorry. Please mujhe maaf kar dijiye.”

Ashutosh smiled, “Its okay. Achchha ye to batao Rohan tumhein aisi kis baat par chidha raha tha ki tum is competition par raazi ho gayin?”

“Woh… Nahin. Rahne dijiye. Bachkani baat thi. I won’t fall for it again.”

“Lekin tha kya?”

“Please. Rahne dijiye.”

“Theek hai. Tum nashta kar lo aur ghar jao. Drive kar logi?”

“Ji.”

“And report for your duty in time. Rohan jab jagega to main use bhej doonga. Taxi mein.”

—

“Nidhi. Kitna mazaa aaya na kal?” Rohan called Nidhi from work.

“Khaak mazaa aaya? Baba ko pata chal jaata to? Aur tumhein pata bhi hai ki Dr. Ashutosh mujh par kitna gussa hue the?”

“Mujh par to nahin hue?”

“Tum par kyon honge? But he was so furious. Bol rahe the ki dubara aisa kuchh hua to I will be grounded.”

“Grounded?” Rohan sounded incredulous, “Ek baat batao Nidhi. Ye Dr. Ashutosh tumhare boyfriend hain ya guardian?”

“Woh mere role model hain. Aage se aisa nahin hona chahiye.”

“Nidhi. Main ekdum sach kah raha tha kal raat. Tum unke saath rah kar ekdum bore ho gayi ho.”

“Main bore nahin hoon. Aur agar ho bhi gayi hoon to unke saath jaisi hoon theek hoon.”

“Are Nidhi. Suno. Tum to naaraaz ho gayin. Main to mazaak kar raha tha.”

“Rohan. Aage se mat karna.” Nidhi disconnected the call in a huff and turned around to find Ashutosh there.

“Aap? Aap kab aaye?”

“Abhi abhi. Kya baat hai? Tum kis par gussa kar rahi thi?”

“Kissi par nahin. Koi kaam tha?”

“Main free tha to socha tumhein dekh loon. Coffee peeni hai?”

“Chaliye. Aur… Aapse kuchh poochhna tha.”

“Kya?”

“Anji Christmas ke din picnic par jaane ka plan bana rahi thi. Sab log chalenge. Baba, Dadi Bua, Anji ki family. Aap chalenge na?”

“Umm… Haan. Tumhari chaperoning ke liye to chalna hi padega mujhe. Warna phir pata nahin kya kar baitho?”

“Dr. Ashutosh please. Main already bahut sharminda hoon.”

“Theek hai. Aur pareshaan nahin karoonga tumhein. Chalte hain picnic par.”

“Dr. Rangnath bhi aa rahe hain. Main Dr. Armaan aur Grace ko bhi invite kar leti hoon. Ab tak to woh log apne naye ghar mein settle ho gaye honge.”

“Haan. Sure. Armaan ko phone kar lena.”

—

Ashutosh joined Nidhi’s family for dinner that night. He observed Rohan closely and felt uneasy. Anji was also there. Rohan, Nidhi and Anji were discussing the picnic plans with excitement. Ashutosh felt left out.

—

They started playing Antakshari after lunch during the picnic. Rohan, Nidhi and Ashutosh were in one team. Armaan, Anji and Rangnath in the other. Others decided to play the audience and referee in case of disputes! The game was being led by Rohan, Nidhi, Anji and Rangnath primarily. Ashutosh and Armaan pitched when the younsters could not remember a song. Nidhi’s team finally won when Ashutosh managed to sing an old song for a letter for which the other team could not think of any. Rohan and Nidhi literally jumped in joy. Rohan hugged Nidhi. Nidhi then turned to Ashutosh and was about to hug him in excitement. But she saw Ashutosh’ discomfort about hugging in public, felt shy herself and stopped. Ashutosh gave a small smile.

“All right guys. Celebration time,” Grace announced and unpacked the cake she had baked for the occasion.

Nidhi jumped on it first, took a bite and exclaimed, “Yummy Cake Grace. I want to learn baking from you.”

“Sure darling.”

“Taste kijiye Dr. Ashutosh,” Nidhi made him bite the same piece. Suddenly Rohan came up to Nidhi and smeared some cake on her face.

“Rohan. I will kill you,” she shouted and ran behind him to take revenge. Anji and Rangnath joined them too and soon all their faces were smeared with cake! Baba and others were laughing hard at their antics and Ashutosh forced a smile on his face. He recalled the night when Nidhi had smeared some cake on him. He had been too stunned. He didn’t react correctly. He didn’t play the game right!

Ashutosh saw that Nidhi was running away from Rohan who was trying to smear more cake on her. In trying to get hold of her, Rohan put his hands on her shoulders and pulled her back. Nidhi stumbled. She was laughing unaware of Ashutosh’ eyes on her. Suddenly she saw him and stopped laughing. She made Rohan take his hands off her, “Bas Rohan. Bahut ho gaya.”

Rohan stopped on hearing her somber, serious voice. Nidhi washed her face and came to sit near Ashutosh. She tried some chit-chat with him, but he was clearly not there.

“Hey Nidhi. New year eve par kissi party mein chalna hai na?” Anji came to her and asked.

“Pata nahin Anji. Koi thodee quite se jagah ho to…”

“Nidhi. Don’t worry about that,” Ashutosh intervened as he realized that she was saying so because of him, “Main waise bhi nahin aa paunga. To tum log apne hisaab se jagah decide kar lo.”

“Kyon nahin aa payenge aap?” Nidhi was disappointed at the idea of not spending the new year eve with him.

“Woh Nidhi. Dr. Sonali ka ek patient hai. Uski surgery honi hai aur unhone mujhse request ki hai ki main wahan rahoon. She was a little nervous about it. Anji. Nidhi tum logon ke saath jayegi,” he turned to Anji and told her.

“Okay. Cool,” Anji said and left.

Nidhi was staring at Ashutosh, not quite believing what he had said, but not being able to accuse him of lying either.

“Excuse me Nidhi. Main thodi der Baba ke paas baithta hoon.”

“Ji.”

—

To be continued

“Doctor banne mein ye bahut problem hai Dr. Ashutosh ki itni saari padhai karni padti hai.”

“Woh to hai.”

“Ye gadbad hai na. Main aise to zindagi bhar padhai hi karti rah jaungi.”

“Nahin. Mujhe nahin lagta ki tum fail hoti rahogi. Ek-aadh papers mein problem ho bhi gayi to supplementary exams se kaam chal jayega.”

“Aapko mazaak soojh raha hai.”

“Maine kuchh galat kaha?”

“Main fail nahin houngi.”

“Phir kya problem hai?”

“Problem ye hai ki phir bhi itne saalon tak padhai karni padegi.”

“To kaun sa tumhari zindagi nikalti ja rahi hai. Ye to samay hi hai padhai karne ka.”

“Aur hamari zindagi ka kya?”

“Hamari zindagi? Hamari zindagi mein kya problem hai?” Ashutosh smiled.

“Aap… aapko… offo… Rahne dijiye. Aap kuchh nahin samjhenge,” Nidhi was irritated and she got up from her chair to go away.

“Baitho. Bhadak kyon rahi ho? Shaadi karne ki bahut jaldbaazi hai tumhein?” Ashutosh said as if talking about weather!

“Kya… nahin… main…”

“Baith jao Nidhi.”

“Aapko honi chahiye thi jaldbaazi. Lekin aapko to jaise koi matlab hi nahin hai.”

“Tumhein pata hai ki that’s not true Nidhi. Lekin main ye nahin chahta hoon ki tumhare liye koi galat faisla ho jaye.”

“I know,” Nidhi pouted, “Lekin itni uncertainties bhi to hain. Agar mera PG mein admission yahan nahin hua to?”

“Hona bhi nahin chahiye. You must do well in the exams and go to AIIMS for PG.”

“Delhi?”

“Haan.”

“Aur aapko usse koi problem nahin hai?”

“Dr. Nidhi Verma. Aisa hai ki thodi bahut reputation to apne professional career mein maine bana li hai. To kissi bhi shahar ke ek achchhe hospital mein mujhe job mil sakti hai. Aur yahan se sabbatical milne mein bhi koi problem nahin hai.”

“Ji? Matlab aap chalenge mere saath agar main…”

“Yes Ma’am. Bharosa nahin hai?”

“Sach mein nahin ho raha.”

“Okay then, Dr. Nidhi Verma! Apni internship aur PG entrance exam khatam hone ke baad, will you marry me? Taki aapko jahan bhi jaana pade, main aapke saath ja sakoon?”

Nidhi stared at him blankly for a few seconds, as if unable to comprehend what he said. Then, she replied with a blushing smile, “Yes.”

“Lekin sach sach batao. Tumhein jaldbaazi hai na shaadi karne ki?” Ashutosh teased her.

“Aapko khushiyan der se mili hain Dr. Ashutosh. Aur main nahin chahti ki meri speed se chalne ki koshish mein aap unhein jee na sakein. I want to catch up with you, to be beside you.”

“Bahut cleverly tumne sab kuchh mere sar par daal diya Nidhi. Lekin thank you!”

“Thanks kyon?”

“Mere dilemma se mujhe nikaalne ke liye aur decision lene mein madad karne ke liye.”

“Baba se baat karni hogi.”

“Haan. Aur mujhe pata hai ki mujhe hi karni hogi. Aap to hamesha ki tarah wahan se bhaag jayengi.”

“Dr. Ashutosh!”

“Nahin. Nahin – ab yahan se mat bhaagna! Please.” Ashutosh laughed.

—

“Men, I say Nidhi. They are useless.”

“Kya hua Anji?”

“They seriously have a single track mind. Mauka milte hi they would drag you to the bed.”

“Dr. Rangnath ne aisa kya kar diya? Kya hua hai?” Nidhi asked naughtily.

“Ab… maine kab kaha ki kuchh hua hai?” Anji suddenly became defensive.

“Nahin? Kuchh bhi nahin hua? How sad!”

“Nidhi. Tu mujhe provoke mat kar. Ya phir main bhi poochhoon ki Dr. Ashutosh ke saath kya haal chaal hain? Ab to Baba ka bhi ashirwaad hai tumhare sar par?”

“Dr. Ashutosh?” Nidhi laughed slightly, “He is on the other extreme Anji. Always a gentleman.”

“Really?”

“Haan. Aur mujhe to bachchon ki tarah treat karte hain. Jaise ki main naabaalig hoon or something like that. Haath pakadne ke liye bhi poochhenge ki main comfortable hoon ya nahin.”

“Kya?”

“Fine. That was an exaggeration. But you get the point.”

“Waise Nidhi. Ye problem aani to natural hai tumhare beech.”

“Kya matlab?”

“Ab umra ka faasla to hai na?”

“To kya hua? Main koi bachchi thode hi na hoon.”

“Behave to tu unke saamne bachchon ki tarah hi karti hai. To woh bhi tujhe waise hi treat karte hain.”

“Main unke saamne waise behave karti hoon, jaisi main hoon.”

“Well – in that case, learn to behave a little mature. May be even look a little mature. Ye college girl waali dresses unke saath kaam nahin karengi.”

“To main roz saree pahnoon?”

“Roz nahin. Kabhi kabhi pahan. You know seduction bhi relationship mein important hota hai.”

“No wonder tu abhi thodi der pahle itna badbadaa rahi thi. Pahle tu Dr. Rangnath ko seduce karegi aur phir jab woh aage aayenge to gussa karegi. That’s unfair Ms. Anjalika Solanki.”

“Tujhe to main abhi batati hoon. Main teri help karne ki koshish kar rahi thi aur tu ulta mujhe hi…”

“Ouch!” Nidhi screamed as Anji threw a pillow on her.

—

Though Nidhi had made a joke out of Anji’s suggestion at that time, the idea was stuck in her mind. She did feel at times that they had become great friends and companions. He clearly cared a lot about her and was also very protective. But did he ever desire her? The way she did! Or did her childish behaviour get in the way of that.

There were a couple of times when she had seen a glimpse of that desire in him. The first was when she had surprised him at his home with a dinner and cake made by her. He had told her how much he wanted to bring her to his home. Their hug that day turned passionate. But darn! He had said sorry about that. It was sweet, but… And then the day Mallika had her breakdown. He had kissed her. But that too after asking for her permission, Nidhi recalled and shook her head smiling. And then he had been really broken that day. He needed support. After that… Nothing.

So, should she think about the art of seduction after all? To let him know that she was the woman of his life and was mature enough to play that part?

—

“Nidhi. Ye sab kya ho raha hai?” Ashutosh entered his room to find stack of candles and flowers. Nidhi was perched on a aluminium ladder trying to place something on the wall, or the roof, he couldn’t tell.

Nidhi was so startled that she stumbled the ladder, but was prevented from falling because Ashutosh held the ladder in time.

“Aap… Aap itni jaldi kaise aa gaye. Aap to surgery attend karne waale the na?”

“Haan. Lekin bachche ka blood pressure control mein nahin aa raha tha to surgery postpone karni padi. Lekin ye sab… Kya haal bana rakha hai tumne apna?” Nidhi was sweating even with the AC on. She had clearly been working hard. She had decorations and flowers stuck to her hair and was looking very hassled.

“Aapko abhi nahin aana tha. Aise nahin dekhna tha mujhe… Main aapke liye…”

“surprise plan kar rahi thi? Lekin ye candles, phool – tum karne kya ja rahi thi Nidhi? Kya Anji se koi interior decoration ki training le kar aayi ho?” Ashutosh laughed.

Nidhi was irritated, “Aap nahin samjhenge…” She ran out of the room.

“Are… Nidhi…” Ashutosh called her, but she did not stop.

Ashutosh took off his coat and made to go after her, when he noticed a packet lying on the bed. He opened it to find a saree in it. Of the color he had said looks good on her. He hit his forehead. Why was he being so thickheaded? She was trying to…

—

He found her sitting in the garden looking sad and frustrated. He sat beside her.

“Nidhi. Gussa mat ho please. Main chaunk gaya tha.” She didn’t reply. So, he spoke again, “Achchha suno. Main wapas jaata hoon. Aur ek ghante mein lautta hoon. Tum jo bhi kar rahi thi, poora kar lo. Main phir aaunga. Okay?”

“Koi fayda nahin hai. Aap use bhi mera bachpana samajh kar hansenge hi.”

“Main nahin hansoonga. Bachpana to hai lekin. Kyonki jo tum chahti ho uske liye ye sab karne ki zaroorat nahin hai.”

“Aapko kya pata ki main kya chahti hoon?”

“Agar tumhari mujhse ye shikayat hai ki main tumhein bachcha samajhta hoon, to tum bhi kam nahin ho. Bilkul bewkoof samajhti ho mujhe?”

“Ye kaisi baat hai?” Nidhi got worried if he thought she was insulting him.

“Andar chalo. Phir batata hoon.”

—

Nidhi looked at him with apprehension and curiosity when they went back to his room.

Ashutosh went to his cupboard and took out a packet, “Change kar lo. Lekin ye pahno.”

“Ye kya hai?”

Ashutosh handed her the packet. She opened it to find a Saree in it. A white chiffon Saree. She looked at him surprised.

“Last week meri nazar padi ek store ke showcase mein. And the only thing I thought of ki ye tum par kitni achchhi lagegi. Aur jab se khareedi hai, tab se pata nahin kitni baar tumhein ismein imagine kiya hai. Pahan ke to dikhao ki meri imagination kitni sahi thi?”

Nidhi smiled and blushed. He did know what she wanted. And he was telling her that he also wanted the same.

“Main aata hoon thodi der mein.” He went out to let her change. Nidhi sat on the bed for a minute to try and control her increasing heart beats. Then she went to the bathroom to freshen up. She decided to take a quick shower instead, dressed up and waited for him to come back.

She was sitting in front of the dresser, combing her wet hair when Ashutosh entered. She gulped hard as she saw him locking the door from inside. She kept the comb back on the dresser and sat still at her place.

Ashutosh came to her and made her stand up.

“Nidhi,” his voice was husky, “Mujhe seduce karne ke liye tum khud hi kaafi ho. In sab cheezon ki zaroorat nahin hai,” he indicated towards the stack of candles and flowers.

Nidhi went red on hearing him say that word – ‘seduce’!

“Aur ye jo tumhara bachpana hai na Nidhi, ye tumhein aur bhi attractive banata hai.”

He seemed to be answering all her unasked questions.

“Aur jab tum zidd karti ho, gussa karti ho to pata hai mera kya karne ka ji chahta hai? Mera ji chahta hai ki tumhein apni baahon mein kas loon aur tab tak tumse pyaar karta rahun jab tak tum mujhse haar na maan lo.”

Nidhi felt her heart pounding. Just his voice was enough to send her to seventh heaven. She bit her lips hard to bring herself back to the real world and to keep herself from swooning.

Ashutosh saw her shivering and held her to provide support.

“Main khud ko rok leta hoon Nidhi kyonki mujhe dar lagta hai ki kahin jaldbaazi mein tumhein chot na pahuncha doon. Lekin…”

“Main koi bachchi nahin hoon,” Nidhi felt she had to say it lest he went back to his ways of treating her like a child again.

“Yes,” Ashutosh smiled, “Tum bachchi nahin ho. And I feel sorry for myself ki itne dinon tak maine iska fayda nahin uthaya.” He was being naugty.

That was so atypical of him! Even in her current state of mind, it surprised Nidhi so much that she looked up at him wide-eyed.

Ashutosh noticed her reaction and laughed slightly, “Make no mistakes Nidhi. Jis din main apne man ki karne par aa jaunga, tumhein bahut sataaunga. Lekin iski shuruat us special din hongi jab tum mujhe mere naam se bulaogi.”

Nidhi blushed. He had read through her desires. She felt extremely shy as well as embarrassed at that realization. She found it difficult to stand so close to him or to meet his eyes. She ran away from him. But the door was locked. With nowhere to go, she just stood near the bed facing away from him.

Ashutosh understood and smiled. He decided to tease her a little more. He approached her, removed her wet hair from one of the shoulders, bent down and planted a kiss on her neck. Nidhi breathed so hard that it made noise.

“Kya hua Nidhi?” Ashutosh asked innocently while caressing her shoulder and neck with his hand. Nidhi turned around to face him and replied, “Kuchh nahin. Mujhe chalna chahiye.”

“Nidhi,” Ashutosh stopped her, “Dinner par chalte hain kahin.”

She nodded.

“Aur tumhari is Saree par kaisi jewelry achchhi lagegi?”

“Pearl,” she replied without thinking and then felt embarrassed, “Uski koi zaroorat nahin hai.”

“Pearl it is then,” Ashutosh did not listen to her, “Chalo.”

—

“Real pearls ki zaroorat nahin hai Dr. Asthuosh,” Nidhi protested when Asuhtosh stopped the car in front of a famous jeweler, “Kissi mall mein ja kar khareed lete hain. Aritficial…”

“Nidhi. Pahli baar tumhare liye jewelry khareed raha hoon. Kuchh to aisa hona chahiye jise tum sambhaal kar rakh sako.”

Nidhi smiled and gave in. She selected a set with ear-rings, necklace and bangles.

“Ek minute Nidhi,” Ashutosh stopped Nidhi from getting into the car after they came out of the shop.

“Kya hua?”

“Tumne koi jewelry pahan bhi to nahin rakhi hai. Ise abhi kyon nahin pahan leti?”

“Okay.”

“Pata hai Nidhi. Aur cheezon ka to nahin pata, lekin tumhare kaanon mein ear-rings dekhne ki aisi aadat ho gayi hai, ki na rahein to kuchh missing lagta hai. Hamesha pahanti ho na tum? Apni dress se match karte hue?”

He notices! Dr. Ashutosh notices what she wears! Even a small accessory like an ear-ring. He had noticed that that was one accessory she always wore. She liked ear-rings. She had one matching with every dress she owned. She remembered the time when he had returned her ear-rings left on the patient’s bed to her.

Nidhi opened the box and took out the ear-rings. She was about to put them on when Ashutosh took the box from her. He started putting the jewelry on her himself. First he put the ear-rings one by one, followed by the necklace and the bangles.

Even as his touches sent shivers own her body, Nidhi could not help but feel emotinoally overwhelmed. He was playing the role of a lover to the T today. She hadn’t expected that from him. She had never been unhappy that he did not behave like a young boy in love with her. She loved him for how he was and how he cared for her. But today, when he did behave like that, she felt extremely elated and happy.

“Thank you,” she said genuinely.

“Nidhi,” Asuhtosh held her hands, “Hum dono ke beech jo ye umra ka faasla hai, use main jaanta hoon. Lekin samajhne mein shayad bhool kar baithta hoon. Mujhe kai baar nahin pata chalta ki tumhein kya achchha lagega, kya nahin. Lekin I want you to know ki main koshish kar raha hoon, aur karta rahunga ki tumhein woh sab kuchh mile jiski tum haqdaar ho aur jisse tumhein khushi milti ho. Aur agar main tumhein woh sab nahin de paya to tum meri class le sakti ho,” he laughed slightly towards the end.

Nidhi also smiled, “And I want you to know ki aap jaise hain, waise hi mujhe bahut achchhe lagte hain. Mujhe khush rakhne ke liye aapko itni mehnat karne ki zaroorat nahin hai. Main bahut khush hoon aapke saath.”

“Chalo phir. Baaton se pet nahin bharta. Dinner karte hain,” Ashutosh said and made his way towards the driver’s seat.

—

To be continued

“Aap thodi der so kyon nahin jaate?” Nidhi said, when they reached his room.

“Nahin Nidhi. Main tumhare saath rahna chahta hoon. Pichhle kuchh dinon se maine…”

“Main yahin hoon,” Nidhi smiled with assurance. When Ashtosh started taking off his coat, Nidhi helped him with it. The ease and familiarity with which she did it made him feel comfortable. He lied down and Nidhi sat beside him. She ran her hands over his eyes in a motherly gesture, making him close them.

He slept for about an hour. When he got up, he saw Nidhi sitting beside him on the other side of the bed. Her back was resting on the headboard, her head supported by a pillow. She was listening to something on her i-pod. Her eyes were closed. Ashutosh sat up slowly so as not to disturb her. She was enjoying the song very much.

The song must have finished, because Nidhi stirred and took the i-pod in her hand to change something, when she noticed Ashutosh. The look in his eyes was different from what she had seen till then. It wasn’t the usual fond or affectionate look he gave to her; not even the exasperated or the protective look that her antics or her problems evoked. Still she recognized the look instantly. It was a look of desire. A desire that she herself felt very strongly, but could not express until he initiated it. Today he was looking at the woman he was incredibly attracted to, not just a companion he was comfortable with.

“Aap… uth gaye. Main chai laati hoon aapke liye.”

Ashutosh nodded. Somewhere in her heart, Nidhi felt disappointed. She was hoping that he would stop her and take her in his arms right then. Her heart ached for his proximity. But he was too much of a gentleman! Always! She let out a sigh as she went out of the room.

—

Ashutosh was standing near the window staring outside, when Nidhi came back with the tea.

“Kya soch rahe hain?” she kept the tea on the table.

He turned back and stared at her. The same look! She felt nervous.

“Kya hua?” she asked not meeting his eyes.

“Soch raha tha ki jo maine uthne ke baad dekha tha woh sach tha ya sapna?”

“Ji?”

“Maine tumhein kabhi bataya Nidhi ki tum kitni khoobsoorat ho?”

“Khoobsoorti aur care to dekhne waale ki aankhon mein hoti hai na?”

“Un aankhon ko sahi training bhi to milni chahiye. Agar kabhi khoobsoorti dekhi hi na ho to aankhein kya pahchaanengi unhein.”

Ashutosh had come very close. Nidhi felt so shy that she closed her eyes. She clenched her fist in an effort to avoid showing what effect he was having on her. But he did not stop. He held her and kissed on her closed eyes. Her fists opened and she lifted her hands to hold him. She needed support.

Her hands instinctively caressed his shoulders and upper arms. The touch drove him mad. He cupped her face and kissed it senselessly all over. Her forehead, her cheeks, chin, tip of the nose, her eyes. Again and again! He was about to kiss her lips when he stopped. Was he going too far too soon?

“Tum mujhe rokogi nahin Nidhi?” he asked in a husky voice still holding her close to himself.

Nidhi opened her eyes and looked at him for a moment, wondering if he was somehow judging her. But she saw nothing like that in his eyes. So, she replied honestly, “Main aapko kabhi nahin rok sakti. Kabhi kissi cheez ke liye mana nahin kar sakti.”

“Lekin tum kya chahti ho?”

“Ye bhi… batana padega…”

“Haan. Main janna chahta hoon.”

“Shayad aapne meri speed aur comfort ko underestimate kar liya hai.”

Ashutosh smiled and bent down to brush her lips with his. She shivered and it drove him crazy. He attacked her lips furiously and thrust his tongue deep into her mouth. Nidhi responded with equal fervour. They were out of breath by the time they finally broke the kiss.

“Chalo. Chai peete hain. Phir bank jaana hai,” Ashutosh suddenly said and went towards the table.

“Bank?” Nidhi was confused and still out of breath.

“Haan. Kuchh kaam hai.”

—

Ashutosh did not tell Nidhi what he brought back in a box from the bank, even when she asked about it. He drove to her home.

As they were about to get down from the car and enter her home, Ashutosh’ mobile rang. It was Sandeep Bagchi again.

“Sandeep… I am sorry. Main abhi aapse nahin mil sakta… Lekin Mallika hospital mein hai… Psychiatric ward mein… Aap doctor ka naam note kar lijiye… Ji haan… Nahin… Woh theek hai…”

Ashutosh looked sad and tired after disconnecting the call.

“Aap phir pareshaan ho gaye? Agar aap jaana chahte hain to…”

“Nahin Nidhi. Meri zindagi mein ab priorities clear hain. Chalo. Baba se baat karni hai.”

—

“Baba. Aap kuchh beemaar se dikh rahe hain?”

“Bilkul nahin. Ekdum tandurust hoon.”

“Maine aapke maathe ki jhurriyan gini thi. Do-chaar zyada dikh rahi hain. Koi pareshaani hai?”

“Sawaal hi nahin paida hota hai. Jhurriyan koi nahin hain mere maathe par.”

“Lekin pareshaani to hai. Aur mujhe pata hai ki kya pareshaani hai.”

Baba didn’t say anything, just looked at him questioningly.

“Baba. Main bas ye kahna chahta hoon ki Nidhi ki parvarish aapne bahut achchhe se ki hai, aur uski taraf aapne apne saare farz bahut achchhe se nibahye hain. Ab aapko uski chinta karne ki koi zaroorat nahin hai. Kam se kam,” he paused to take a breath, “uski shaadi aur uske intzaam ki to bilkul nahin.”

“Ye baat achanak…”

“Baba. Pahli baat to shaadi ki koi jaldbaazi nahin hai. Abhi uske saamne bahut se kaam hain. Internship hai. PG ki taiyaari hai, phir uski padhai. In sabke beech mein shaadi ki tension nahin honi chahiye. Aur doosre, jab bhi shaadi karni hai, tab aapko kuchh karne ki zaroorat nahin hai. Uske liye hum log hain. Aap bas use ek cheez de dein, jisse use saari khushiyan, saare aashirwaad mil jayenge.”

Ashutosh got up and gave the box he had brought from the bank to Baba, “Uski Mummy ke gahne.”

Baba didn’t say anything for a few moments. Then he started to speak, “Ashutosh…”

“Nahin. Kuchh mat kahiye,” Ashutosh stopped him.

Baba smiled, his eyes moistening, “Main to kuchh nahin kahunga. Mujhe to andaaza tha. Lekin is pagli ko to dekho. Kuchh bhi nahin pata tha ise. Dekho kaise aankhein phaad phaad kar dekh rahi hai aur ro bhi rahi hai.”

Ashutosh looked at Nidhi. Baba’s description was accurate. Nidhi was overwhelmed and crying.

“Ek aur locker par kyon kharcha kiya jaye. Inhein wahi rakh do Ashutosh jahan ab tak rakhe the. Iske hain, ise hi de dena. Mujhe to kuchh nahin kahna. Shayad ise kahna hoga,” Baba said and went inside leaving Ashutosh and Nidhi alone in the hall.

“Hey Nidhi. Kya hua?” Ashutosh said in a soft voice. He went forward and wiped her tears, “Ro kyon rahi ho?”

Nidhi started smiling and crying together. “Aapne… ye sab… kyon kiya itna kuchh?”

“Look who is talking. Pagli. Tum mere Baba ka ghar mujhe bhi bechne ko taiyaar nahin thi. Main tumhari Mummy ke gahne kissi aur ko kaise bech deta. Ab rona band karo. Come on.”

She leaned forward and hugged him tight. He hugged her back.

They were disturbed by someone coughing. They hastily separate to see Rohan coming in.

“Excuse me? Dr. Ashutosh. Dhokha to kal aapne mujhe diya tha. Dinner se bhaag kar. Aur make-up Nidhi ke saath ho raha hai? Not fair.”

Ashutosh smiled in embarrassment, but Nidhi replied, “Aisi koi problem nahin hai Rohan. Dr. Ashutosh tumhein bhi hug kar sakte hain.”

“Nahin… nahin ji. Main aise hi theek hoon. Aap hug offer karti to aur baat thi. Ab jab aap khush hain to inhein to maine aise hi maaf kar diya.”

“Lekin as a compensation, next time meri taraf se dinner,” Ashutosh said.

“Kab?”

“Kal hi chalte hain.”

“Aaj kyon nahin?”

Ashutosh and Nidhi exchanged a glance. They had not talked about it, but Ashutosh wanted to take Nidhi out and she understod that.

“Rohan!” Nidhi chided him.

“Okay ji. Bilkul okay. Main aaj kabab mein haddi bilkul nahin banoonga. Aap log achchhe se make-up kar lijiye. Mere liye Chhote Sarkar ka hi khana theek hai.”

—

To be continued

“Ashutosh!” Armaan was waiting for him, when Ashutosh came back.

“Armaan. Tum abhi tak jage hue ho?”

“Nidhi se baat ho gayi?”

“Haan. Thanks Armaan. Samay par mere hosh thikaane laane ke liye,” Ashutosh smiled.

“Ashutosh. Main Grace se baat kar raha tha. I think tumhein usse apni situation discuss karni chahiye.”

“Situation?”

“Mallika ke saath jo halat ho rahi hai tumhari, woh bahut healthy to nahin hai?”

“Main kya karoon Armaan? Nidhi ko main dukh nahin pahuncha sakta. Lekin Mallika ki ye halat dekh kar use bhi to apne haal par nahin chhod sakta. Woh meri itni purani dost hai Armaan.”

“Grace has some ideas Ashutosh. Ek baar usse baat karo.”

“Abhi? Woh jagi hui hai.”

Armaan laughed slightly, “Pahli baar aise duniya ke doosri or aaye hai na. Buri tarah jetlagged hai. Abhi ekdum awake and fresh feel kar rahi hai.”

—

“Mallika went to a pub and then took the sleeping pills?” Grace interrupted Ashutosh to confirm while he was narrating the story.

“Yes.”

“Doesn’t that sound odd? Why would she go to a public place and to commit suicide.”

“She said she was feeling anxious alone at home and hence had gone to a pub. And then…”

“carrying all those pills?”

“I don’t know what do you mean?”

“I can’t say for sure, but she might be trying to get your attention Ashutosh.”

“But I wasn’t there. She knows I don’t go to pubs. Why would she…”

“Right. But, she did reach you. What would have happened if Nidhi wasn’t there?”

“I don’t know. Someone would have…”

“tried to find out who she is, who are her friends and family and they would have informed them.”

“Yes.”

“So, was she carrying any identification with her?”

“No… I mean I don’t know. She was carrying a purse, but… Wait! Nidhi would know. She had checked her purse. Let me call her.”

—

“Nidhi. So gayi thi kya?”

“Neend aayi nahin thi abhi? Kya baat hai? Aap theek to hain?”

“Haan. Main bilkul theek hoon Nidhi. Lekin mujhe tumhari help chahiye.”

“Kaisi help?”

“Nidhi. Tum bhadakna mat. Main bas cheezon ko samajhne ki koshish kar raha hoon.”

“Itna bhadakti hoon kya main?”

“Nahin Nidhi.”

Nidhi chuckled, “Aapko pareshaan karna bahut aasaan hai. Khair, I guess Dr. Mallika ke baare mein hai. Bataiye.”

“Haan. Nidhi. Us din jab tumne Mallika ka purse khola tha aur usmein sleeping pills dekhi thi, to purse mein kuchh aur bhi mila tha?”

“Kya matlab?”

“Koi identification? Koi address? Koi contact?”

“Ohh!!”

“Kya baat hai Nidhi?”

“Aap abhi kyon poochh rahe hain?”

“Main tumhein phir batata hoon Nidhi. Abhi bas batao. Kuchh tha kya?”

“Ji. Usmein ek paper tha jispar emergency contact kah ke aapke naam aur number tha.”

“Tumne kabhi ye baat batayi kyon nahin?”

“Us samay main unki halat dekh kar ghabrai hui thi aur phir kabhi baat hui nahin us baare mein. Mere dhyaan se utar gaya.”

“Theek hai. Main tumse baad mein baat karta hoon.”

Ashutosh looked thoughtful after disconnecting the call.

“What happened Ashutosh?” Grace asked.

“Yeah,” he wa startled as if he had forgotten that he had been talking to Grace before that, “Grace. She was carrying a paper in her purse where she had given my name and number as emergency contact.”

“I guess it makes sense to you now, doesn’t it? Nidhi being there was a mere coincidence. Mallika would have reached you in any case.”

“And she had taken the pills in the exact quantity to make her pass out, but not cause death. She is a doctor. She knows the exact effect. Oh God! She needs psychiatric help,” Ashutosh said more to himself than to Grace.

“I think she does.”

—

“Aap yahan?” Nidhi was surprised to find Ashutosh waiting in his car when she came out of her house to leave for the hospital the next day.

“Baitho.”

Nidhi took the passenger’s seat and looked at Ashutosh questioningly. He smiled and picked something up from his lap. Nidhi was surprised to see that it was a red rose. It made her blush.

“Aap ye mere liye laye hain?” she couldn’t help asking.

“Haan Nidhi. Maine socha ki sorry kahne ka isse behtar tareeka nahin ho sakta.” He handed the rose to her, “I am sorry. Jo kal raat hua aur jo itne dinon se hota aa raha tha, un sabke liye.”

“Mere paas rose nahin hai. Lekin I am also sorry. Mujhe aapse aisi badtamizi nahin karni chahiye thi.”

“Nahin Nidhi. Tumne achchha hi kiya. Meri aankhein bhi khol di. Jo ho raha tha woh kissi ke liye sahi nahin tha. Na to hamare liye. Na hi Mallika ke liye.”

“Ji. Lekin aap karenge kya? Dr. Mallika is not ready to come to terms with the reality. She blames everyone except herself.”

“Usne tumse bhi kuchh kaha?”

“Haan. Lekin aap woh mujhse mat poochhiye. Main nahin bol paungi.”

“Tumne mujhe bataya kyon nahin?”

“Jaisi ghatiya baatein unhone kahi thi, aap unse woh expect nahin karte hain. Aapko bekaar mein dukh hota. Aur…” she suddenly stopped.

“Kya hua Nidhi?”

“Main aap dono ke beech mein to nahin aayi hoon Dr. Ashutosh?” Nidhi asked. Even though she knew that it was not the case, self doubt did trouble her once in a while.

“No. No Nidhi. Oh God! What gave you the idea?”

“Dr. Mallika ko hamesha se yahi lagta hai.”

“Nidhi. I need you to know this…”

“Nahin,” she interrupted, “I am sorry I asked. Aapko kuchh explain karne ki zaroorat nahin hai.”

“Ek baar bol lene do Nidhi. Uske baad na to tumhein dubara is baare mein sochne ki zaroorat hai, na hi mujhe kuchh kahne ki. Mallika se meri dosti bahut purani hai. Aur main uski kadra karta tha. Usse zyada mere man mein kabhi kuchh nahin tha. Aur maine Mallika ko bhi kabhi andhere mein nahin rakha. Usne apni zindagi ke saath jo kiya woh uski choice thi. Usmein mera ya tumhara koi role nahin hai. Samajh rahi ho na tum?”

“Ji.”

“To ab mujhe tumhari pyaari si smile wapas mil sakti hai?”

Nidhi didn’t have to try to smile when he said that. It automatically came to her.

—

On the way to the hospital, Ashutosh’ mobile rang. Nidhi saw it, but the number was not stored in the phone.

“Main pick kar loon?”

“Haan. Kar lo.”

“Hello.”

“Hello. Dr. Ashutosh se baat ho sakti hai?”

“Woh drive kar rahe hain, isliye phone nahin uthaya. Aap kaun?”

“Main Sandeep Bagchi bol raha hoon. Aap please unse meri baat karwaiye. Urgently.”

“Sandeep Bagchi? Dr. Mallike ke…”

“Haan. Dekhiye mera Dr. Ashutosh se baat karna bahut zaroori hai.”

Ashutosh had stopped the car by then on hearing Sandeep Bagchi’s name.

“Kya baat hai Nidhi?”

“Aapse baat karna chahte hain?”

“Hello,” Ashutosh took the phone and spoke in a curt tone.

“Dr. Ashutosh. Kya Mallika Lucknow mein hai?”

“Ye main aapko kyon bataun?”

“What do you mean kyon bataun… she is my wife. I have been worried to death…”

“Wife? Mr. Bagchi, Hindu and Civil marriage acts ke hisaab se ek spouse ke rahte doosri shaadi invalid hoti hai. She is not your wife.”

“No!” Sandeep sounded incredulous, “She has told you the same story.”

“Story?”

“Dr. Ashutosh. Main pahle se shaadi shuda nahin hoon. Pata nahin ye shaq ka keeda uske dimaag mein kahan se ghus gaya hai. I tried to get her psychiatric help. Lekin woh ghar chhod kar pata nahin kahan chali gayi… Look Dr. Ashutosh. I really need to meet her. Please. Woh Lucknow mein hai.”

“Why should I believe you?”

“Dr. Ashutosh. Okay. Main next available flight se Lucknow aa raha hoon. It is clear ki Mallika wahin hai. Why did I not think of it earlier? Aap usse bas ye poochhiye ki usne meri so called first wife ko dekha hai? Aur kahan rahti hai woh?”

Ashutosh was completely confused when he disconnected the call.

“Kya hua Dr. Ashutosh.”

Ashutosh explained to her what Sandeep had told him.

“Ye kahani itni ulajhti kyon ja rahi hai? Kaun sach bol raha hai kaun jhooth – ye kaise pata lagayega koi?”

“Pata nahin Nidhi. Ye to sach hai ki Mallika kabhi uski first wife se mili nahin hai. Uske hisaab se woh US mein rahti hain. Khair. Main pahle tumhein hospital pahuncha doon. Tumhari duty ka time ho raha hai. Phir dekhta hoon.”

“Waise aap apne boss hone ka poora fayda uthate hain, nahin Dr. Ashutosh? Aapki koi duty timings to hoti nahin hain?”

“Behave yourself Dr. Verma. Insubordination ke liye aapko suspend kiya ja sakta hai,” Ashutosh continued her joke and they broke in to a laughter.

—

“Ashutosh! Kahan the tum?” Mallika stormed into Asuhtosh’ office without paying any attnention to Rangnath sitting in the outer office or Anji who was visiting him.

“Mallika?”

“Subah tum aaye kyon nahin mujhse milne?” Mallika was furious.

“Aisi to koi baat nahin hui thi Mallika. Main busy tha.”

“Mujhe pata hai tum kahan busy the. Nidhi ke saath busy the na tum? Tumhari samajh mein nahin aata Ashuotsh ki woh ladki tumhein phansa rahi hai. Tum uske liye mujhe chhod kar kaise aa sakte ho? Kaise aisa kar sakte ho tum?”

“Tamasha mat karo Mallika. Please shaant ho jao.”

Rangnath heard some noises, which sounded like Mallika was throwing things around in Ashutosh’ office. He rushed and opened the office door. Ashutosh looked relieved to see some help.

“Dr. Rangnath. Please help me. She seems to have a psychotic fit,” Dr. Ashutosh whispered trying to not let Mallika hear it.

“Yes Sir,” Rangnath understood the situation and made calls from his office.

Immediately two nurses came there and tried to control Mallika who was getting more and more violent. A doctor from the psychiatric ward also walked in. They tried to calm her down. But to no avail. Finally the doctor injected a sedative and the nurses carried her out of Ashutosh’ office.

Meanwhile, Anji had gone to look for Nidhi to inform her of what had happened. Ashutosh sank in his chair after Mallika was taken out. Rangnath was standing there and did not know what to say, when Anji and Nidhi walked in. Nidhi saw Ashutosh who had buried his face in his hands. He was clearly very disturbed at what had happened. Nidhi silently indicated to Anji and Rangnath to leave them alone and they complied.

Nidhi walked to Ashutosh and kept a hand on his shoulder. Ashutosh looked up and on seeing her got up from his chair to face her. He took her hands in his.

“Mujhe pahle hi samajhna chahiye tha Nidhi. Agar main tumhari baat pahle samajh jaata to ye naubat nahin aati. I am sorry.”

“Aap khud ko kyon blame kar rahe hain? Jo sab mujhe pata tha, ya jo kuchh unhone mujhse kaha tha woh aapko pata nahin tha. Main aapko bata deti to aapko bhi andaaza lag jaata.”

“Lekin tum mujhe isliye nahin batana chahti thi ki mujhe bura lagta.”

Nidhi nodded, “Aise hi aap logon par bharosa nahin karte. Main nahin chahti thi ki aapka ek aur bharosa toote. But I didn’t see it coming to this.”

Ashutosh felt overwhelmed at her love. He brought her hands up, bowed a little and kissed her hands one by one. Nidhi froze to her spot and gulped hard. But Ashutosh did not stop there and pulled her in a hug. Nidhi reciprocated. He needed support.

But she pulled away after a few seconds, “Hum… office mein hain,” she said gingerly.

Ashutosh smiled in embarrassment, “Yes. Dr. Nidhi. Hum office mein hain.”

“Lekin hamara office mein rahna zaroori nahin hai,” he suddenly spoke again after a pause.

“Ji?”

“Ghar chalte hain Nidhi. Mujhe thoda sukoon chahiye, jo abhi yahan nahin mil sakta.”

Nidhi’s heart melted when he said that. For the first time since she had known him, he looked tired. At that moment she felt like making him lie down with his head in her lap and caress his hair until he fell asleep.

But there were realities of life, “Meri duty…”

“Koi emergency nahin hai to main Dr. Rangnath se baat karta hoon. Woh kissi ko depute kar denge.”

“Main… main baat karti hoon.” She could never forget her concern about his reputation.

“Okay,” Ashutosh nodded, “Main car mein tumhara wait kar raha hoon.”

—

To be continued