Mish' Fiction

“Can’t you do your graduation from an open college?” Paritosh asked Rupali one evening.

She hesitated. If she told him of her constraints and problems, he might offer to help again. “I can, I guess,” she replied in a non-committed fashion.

“You never get enough time?” he prodded, leaving her with no option but to admit.

“Yes.”

“If you could leave your job at pharmacy… How much do you make there?”

“No! No Dr. Khanna. I can’t take another penny from you now. There is already…”

“Look at it in another way. I can pay for Soumitra’s and Sugata’s studies while you finish your college. Think of it as student loan. They can repay me when they start earning.”

“Please don’t embarrass me Dr. Khanna. I can’t do that. Please!”

He sighed in disappointment. But he had promised her that he wouldn’t do anything without telling her. If she was so adamant, he would have to back off. “Fine! But if you change your mind, let me know.”

“Okay.”

—

“Dr. Khanna.” Soumitra found Paritosh alone on the Saturday afternoon. Rupali and Meenal were taking a nap. Sugata was studying.

“Soumitra. Come in. What’s up?” A part of the room had mattresses laid out on the floor. He was sitting on one of them, resting his back against the wall and reading a book.

“Can I talk to you for couple of minutes?”

“Sure. Tell me.”

“I never apologized to you…”

“Apologized? For what?”

“What I had said about you, and Didi…”

“Oh! It’s okay, Soumitra. You were worried about your sister. You don’t need to apologize.”

“Didi thinks it was an absurd idea. I think, she meant it was offensive.”

“What was offensive? To whom?”

He chuckled nervously, “The idea that you would want to marry her… Offensive to you?”

Paritosh frowned. “Offensive? To me?” he mumbled more to himself than to Soumitra. Then he looked up at him, “Why don’t you sit down, Soumitra? Let’s talk about whatever you have in your mind.”

He sat down opposite him on the mattress and said after a pause, “I don’t know if I am doing the right thing, Dr. Khanna. By talking to you. Can you promise not to tell Didi? And not to let it affect her job… I am doing something that might potentially embarrass her.”

“Relax Soumitra. We are together on that point. I won’t do anything to increase her troubles. Now tell me, what is it that you really want to ask?”

“That day, when I was ranting about Didi giving so much time to Meenal and you… you had said that you weren’t so selfish that you would saddle her with Meenal’s responsibility for life. Was that your only objection? If you were not worried about it potentially being unfair to her, would you propose to her? Would you marry her?”

Despite having anticipated, where this was going, the direct question unnerved him for a while. Then he smiled, “Between ‘would I propose her?’ and ‘would I marry her?’ you forgot to ask the most important question. Would she say ‘yes’? And if she doesn’t, what would it mean for her, for Meenal, for me, for you and Sugata? What we have here is a comfortable, even if not ideal, arrangement. Once I say something, things must move forward, together or apart. It won’t be possible for us to return to this. Do you understand that?”

“You are only talking about her not agreeing. What about you? Wouldn’t it bother you that she is not well-educated, she is poor…”

“You think those are my objections?”

“She thinks so…”

“You have spoken to her?” Paritosh was suddenly more alert to the conversation.

“Sort of. After listing out all her shortcomings, she did not let me discuss it any further though.”

“She didn’t say anything about Meenal? Or about me?”

“No.”

“What does it mean Soumitra?” he could feel his heart-beats increasing.

“I can’t say Dr. Khanna. Why don’t you ask her? I think she loves Meenal too much to leave her just like that. If it came to the point of going forward apart, she would hate me as much as you will… I think so…”

“And how about you? And Sugata?”

He chuckled, “She isn’t going to leave us behind. For anything. So, it’s not for us to worry. It’s for you to think through. We come in a package, unfortunately. That is another shortcoming of hers that anyone associated with her has to live with. I should get going now. I have a test to study for as well.”

“Hmm…” Paritosh had withdrawn into some world of his own. He was no longer paying any attention to Soumitra. Soumitra smiled and noiselessly left the room.

—

“Dr. Khanna… Meenal…” Rupali was out of breath, and probably of mind, as she barged into the room later in the afternoon. She spotted Meenal with him and sighed in relief. “I woke up and didn’t find her.”

“Relax,” he smiled at her, “She was awake when I walked by her room. She was going to wake you up. I brought her away so that you could sleep for a while longer.”

She was still panting. “I will check on milk for her…”

“She had it already. Rupali, why don’t you come and sit down with us?”

There was something extremely intimate about the idea of sitting with him in his bedroom. She had noticed the mattresses on the floor earlier. Did he like sitting on the floor? She walked in slowly and sat across him.

He leaned forward a little as he spoke, “You got so worried for her?”

“I was sleepy. And it just didn’t occur to me that you were around and could have taken her.”

“What did you think?”

“I wasn’t thinking anything. I was scared to death.”

He fell silent.

“What happened?” she asked anxiously when he didn’t continue the conversation.

“You have too many worries to take care of alone, don’t you?”

“Why… are you… saying that?” she frowned slightly.

“How does it feel? Caring so much for someone?”

“What kind of a question is that?” she chuckled nervously, “And why are you asking me that? You know very well.”

“And do you know how does it feel to care for someone, but not being able to do anything for them? Because you have no right to.”

Rupali did not know where this was going. She stared at him, while clutching hard at the mattress.

“There are things I want to be different; things that are within my means. And yet – I can’t have them the way I want. Because I have no rights over you.”

“Dr. Khanna!” she could barely speak and gulped hard.

“I would like you to leave that draining, awfully timed pharmacy job; I would like you to go to college, to have you build your career the way you would have dreamt before… But you say no to my support. And I have to back off. I can’t insist; I can’t impose. I have no rights,” he grew agitated.

“Dr. Khanna. Please stop.” She was extremely nervous now. Was he offended? Did she have to make some amends again? Can’t her life remain uneventful for a while? Can’t she feel secure in her position even for a few days?

“I have gone too far to stop. I want some rights over you, Rupali. I want to be able to dictate some things. ”

“I don’t understand,” she was extremely scared. It was making no sense.

“You don’t understand? You are anyway not going to get rid of Meenal’s responsibility. I don’t want you to be just a mother-figure to her. I want you to be her mother.”

Rupali jerked in surprise.

“I want you to marry me.” There! He had managed to say it. He waited with his anxieties soaring high.

Her throat went dry. She looked away. This wasn’t happening, was it? It was impossible. She wasn’t worthy of him.

“You are not in your right mind,” she mumbled after a pause, “Do you realize what you are saying?”

“Why is it so difficult to believe?”

Instead of replying, she got up and ran away from there.

“Damn it!” Paritosh cursed under his breath. Had he screwed it all up? He turned to his daughter, “Meenu will stay here, okay? Don’t go anywhere.”

“Meenu will stay here,” she repeated. Paritosh got up and rushed out to find Rupali. He could not immediately locate her. After searching in the various rooms and the lawn, he went to the swimming pool.  She was leaning against a pole there and was crying unhindered. He looked around. Nobody was there.

Did she disagree with his proposal and was worrying about her job again? That was very likely.

“Rupali,” he approached her, “Stop crying please. What are you worried about? You don’t want it? Just say so. Nothing has changed. Nothing at all. I am the same Paritosh… Dr. Khanna you have always known. Just tell me you don’t want it and we will forget I ever said anything. I repeat, Rupali. Nothing has changed.”

She had stopped crying by then. She wiped her tears. “How can nothing change?”

He was doomed! Everything was going to fall apart. He had to pull it back together. He tried desperately, “Of course, it can. Just forget I said anything…”

“You are not letting me talk,” she complained.

“Yeah… Right…” he grew embarrassed at his abrupt attempts to set things right. “Please… talk…” he added foolishly.

“Why me?”

“Why you?” he was incredulous at her question, “Didn’t I almost give a speech a while back?”

“Because you want rights over me? To set my life right?”

“What?”

“Is this another way of helping me? Because otherwise I don’t let you?”

“What the hell, Rupali? What do you think? You aren’t the only one who works for me. I don’t go around doing this to help people…”

“You want to marry an uneducated, broke girl who survives on what you pay her?”

“Education and money can be acquired, Rupali. But strength of character and kindness of heart? They are another matter. They just have to be there. And who will value those more than me? I love you, you idiot! How do I make you believe this?”

Her eyes became moist again.

“Why are you crying again?” he was out of his wits, “You don’t believe me?”

“I believe you. You said it. I believe you.”

“I said what? Oh!” she was looking for those three words. The practical breadwinner and provider of the family had a romantic girl in her too! That was reassuring. The responsibilities and struggles of life had not killed her youthful dreams. He smiled feeling hopeful, “I can say it a thousand times, if you need to hear it.”

“No. I believe you. But will you believe me…” she choked.

“Believe you on what?”

“That I am madly in love you. And it’s not about your money.”

He held her shoulders and chuckled softly, “You have refused money too many times to let me depend on my money to win you, Rupali. I was relying on your feelings. I am glad I was right.”

A broad grin broke on her lips even as she looked down. She felt like laughing, and jumping. Impossible had happened to her. Nothing could go wrong with her life any longer. But she was too shy to react with that much exuberance. She just let herself relax as he put his arms around her and drew her in a close, tight hug. They no longer had to feel awkward about doing that!

– The End –

“What are these?” Rupali asked in surprise as Paritosh handed her a small packet with a bunch of pills.

“You said you were unwell. I just went to a chemist…”

“Dr. Khanna. I just needed paracetamol. I have already taken it. If I sleep for couple of hours I will be fine.”

“There are some for cold and cough as well, if needed…”

“I just have slight fever and body pain. I will be fine. Trust me.”

“Are you sure I should leave Meenal here? I can try taking her with me…” Rupali had called him up that morning and requested him to drop Meenal at her place, instead of Rupali going to theirs. She was not feeling well.

“She is at home here. She won’t be any trouble. I will lock the house from inside. Even if I fall asleep for a bit, she would be fine.”

“Yeah. Okay then. If there is any problem, don’t hesitate in calling.”

“I won’t. Thanks, Dr. Khanna.”

“Take care. Bye.”

—

When Paritosh came back in the evening, the door to the house was unlocked. He pushed it and came in. He was greeted by a strange sight. Meenal was sitting in front of Rupali’s computer, apparently typing away. The computer was old, he noticed. It was probably the one she had bought while her parents were still alive. Rupali was standing behind Meenal, with her right hand on her chin, fingers covering her lips. Her eyes were moist and it seemed like she was trying hard to suppress a sob.

“What’s going on?” he asked and came forward to stand beside Rupali. What he saw on the screen virtually blew his mind off.

“She has typed all this?” he asked wide-eyed.

Rupali only nodded; she was too overwhelmed to speak.

Paritosh went forward and kneeled on the floor beside Meenal. She looked at him and stopped typing. He took the Mouse and scrolled up. First few pages were gibberish. Probably she was randomly pressing keys on the keyboard. Then she had started typing the alphabets in order. Finally the words; and then sentences she practiced for school and exams.

It was the last couple of pages that held real surprise.

“Her name is Rupali,” read one of the paragraphs, “She smiles. She laughs. She is happy. Meenu is happy. Meenu cannot talk. Rupali. Throat itches. Rupali looks like Mamma.”

“Papa does not laugh,” she had typed next, “Meenu loves Papa. Papa cries. Papa is not happy. Meenu loves Rupali. Rupali is happy.”

Paritosh looked at his daughter. She was sitting still; her face, as usual, not showing any emotions. But the screen in front of him told him what she could never express. As Rupali had thought, she understood. “No Meenu. Papa is happy. Papa is very happy with Meenu. Do you understand?”

She managed an awkward nod.

“And Papa loves Meenu.”

She nodded again.

Then Paritosh got up and went to Rupali. She could no longer hold herself back. She started sobbing. Paritosh tried to calm her down and did not realize when, in that process, took her in his arms. She sobbed for a while with her head resting on his chest.

“Hey. Why are you crying? It’s great, isn’t it? You were right. She understands. Everything.”

They weren’t aware of Soumitra standing at the door. He did not make any sound and after a while slipped out noiselessly.

“I’m sorry,” she got a hold of herself finally and stepped back, “I was so overwhelmed.”

“Of course,” he said softly, “How did it happen, though?”

“Accidentally. She was bored of all the toys that were here. I wasn’t feeling well enough to teach her anything. So, I tried to see if something on computer can keep her busy. She liked the keyboard; I think she recognized the letters. Then I left her to play with it. She did all this by herself. I had fallen asleep for a while. I got up, when some salesman came and knocked at the door. After sending him off, I noticed this. That’s when you came in.”

“You are happy, aren’t you?”

“I am. And you?”

“Very happy. I am very happy.”

“Papa,” Meenal’s voice drew their attention. They went to her. She had typed something again.

“Papa loves Meenu. Papa is happy.”

Paritosh smiled at her. “Yes. Papa loves Meenu. Papa is very happy.”

—

“I ran into Meher Didi today,” Soumitra told Rupali and Sugata while they ate dinner later in the evening. Rupali had found someone who agreed to do the night shift at the pharmacy, and she had taken off from there. She would have a good night’s sleep to recover.

“Oh! And?” Rupali asked curiously.

“She told me that Dr. Khanna is all praises for you.”

“Hmm…”

“She was quite surprised about it. Apparently it is quite difficult to please Dr. Khanna. And with Meenal, it was particularly tough.”

“I was lucky that way, Soumitra. She herself took to me.”

“You also love her Didi, don’t you?”

Rupali laughed nervously, “Is that a trick question? Are you going to ask me to choose between her and you?”

“No. No,” Soumitra hastened to clarify, “Nothing like that. I… I might behave like a jerk sometimes, Didi. But I never meant to create problems for you.”

“Hey! It’s all right. What’s up with you? Is something bothering you?”

“No Didi. Not at all. I am just trying to have a conversation. It’s not an investigation or something.”

Rupali relaxed and laughed slightly, “Okay Boss. As you say. So, what were you asking?”

“I was asking about Meenal. You love the kid, don’t you?”

“Yes Soumitra,” she replied somberly, “I love her. She is an unfortunate child. She added after a pause, “Even though Ma-Baba are not with us, we know that they loved us. They would never have abandoned us knowingly. Her mother, on the other hand, never accepted her. She committed suicide because of her. It is not a pretty situation.”

“Hmm… But Dr. Khanna is different, isn’t he?”

“Yeah. He is a very nice and caring man. He loves his daughter. He would do anything for her.”

“He cares a lot even for you, Didi.”

“Well. As I said, he is a nice man.”

“It’s not just about being civil. But caring… I mean that washing machine… Club drive or not… He did it for you.”

“Yes. He is very generous too.”

“I mean… I think he is in love with you, Didi.”

“Soumitra!” Sugata interrupted before Rupali could say anything, “You are again talking rubbish. Saying things without thinking. What is wrong with you? Why are you so intent on hurting her?”

“I am doing nothing of that sort,” Soumitra replied patiently, but firmly, “Didi. I am just saying what I felt. I am not being judgmental. I don’t even mean that something should come out of it. But what do you think about it? If he asks, would you marry him?”

Rupali’s initial shock and nervousness had subsided. She could carefully choose her words, “I am not going to marry anyone, Soumitra. My only concerns in life right now are your studies, and you careers.”

“But if he asks?”

“Don’t have absurd dreams. I am his employee – a house help, caretaker for his daughter, who he has taken pity on and who he is paying more than usual. He is a professor; I am not even a college graduate. He is from a rich, prestigious family. I won’t even be able to make ends meet, if he stops paying me. Do you see how absurd your proposition is?”

“And he is too old for her,” Sugata added.

“That is not the point, Sugata,” Rupali contradicted him; though immediately realized that she should have stayed silent. It could give away her real feelings to Soumitra, who was very perceptive, “But nevertheless. Let’s not try to read too much into the generosity of a rich man. Let’s eat what we are lucky enough to have on the table today.”

Soumitra sighed and shook his head. As Rupali had worried, her contradicting Sugata’s point had not escaped his notice. If she didn’t think anything about him, whey should she bother responding to that objection? And there were other things he had noticed too. All her objections were from Paritosh’ side. She never said that she didn’t like him, or that she would say no. She loved not only Meenal, but her father too. And she was too insecure about her shortcomings to accept it before anyone else.

—

To be continued

Things were all right on Paritosh’ front. But Rupali still had to do something about Soumitra. He was upset and had started giving her silent treatment. She tried to get Sugata to mediate, but Soumitra would not give in. He would not even say what was bothering him. It grew worse when he announced that he wasn’t coming with them to Paritosh’ house that weekend.

“Why not?”

“I have to study.”

“You can do that there. You always do.”

“I am going to study with friends.”

That wasn’t true. He never did that, she knew it. When she woke up on Saturday to put the clothes in washing machine, an idea struck her. If washing machine was the root of all problems…

“What are you doing?” Soumitra came to the bathroom, where Rupali was sitting with heaps of clothes and washing them by hand.

“Washing clothes, Soumitra. What else?” she replied matter-of-factly.

“What happened to the washing machine?”

“Nothing.”

“Then why are you not using it?”

She sighed and looked at him, “Because a washing machine is not more important than my brother for me.  It is that machine that has made you upset, isn’t it? That I did not return it?”

Soumitra flushed and stood silent.

“I am sorry, Soumitra. I really am. For having scolded you.”

“Why did you keep the washing machine, then?”

“There was indeed a drive by the club…”

“He doesn’t go to a club, you had said.”

“But he is a lifetime member. He showed me the e-mails.”

“The machine was from the club?”

“No. It was his. But he was planning to give it for the drive.”

“Hmm…”

“Soumitra, it is likely that it is still a favor; that he just taking cover behind the drive. But he is acutely aware of the things that you are bothered about. For example, the amount of time I have to give to Meenal. He is trying to make up for it; and make up in a way that works for us. He pays me more, which is helpful. This was one misguided way of making up, but I just couldn’t burn my bridges with him. So, I kept it. You probably felt betrayed after how I had scolded you. I am sorry, I burst out. But I am just trying to balance things… I also don’t always know what is right or wrong. I felt that his heart was in the right place. So, I let this one go… I made him promise that he won’t do something like this in future…”

Soumitra looked thoughtful; then spoke with a smile, “Then why are you not using the machine?”

“I didn’t want to burn bridges with him. But more than that, I can’t afford to alienate you Soumitra. If you hate the machine, I don’t want to use it. What do you think has kept me going for all these years, since Ma-Baba’s death? It is the two of you. If you are not happy, there is no point to my life, my job…” her eyes became moist.

“Didi!”

“That’s how it is. Don’t you understand that?”

“Let’s put the clothes in the washing machine, shall we?”

“Soumitra…”

“I am sorry, Didi. I really am. I was angry. I shouldn’t have been.”

“Now you are not?”

He shook his head; then said again, “Let’s put the clothes in the washing machine.”

—

Preparing Meenal to write exams at school took considerable efforts. They had to request the school to let her attend classes for a few days following up to the exams so that she got used to school and other children. The first couple of days were particularly difficult and Rupali had to be physically present in every class drawing some curious glances from students and staff. But after that they were surprised to see the improvements. Meenal was not only able to follow teacher’s instructions; she also made a couple of friends. With the help of the therapist, Rupali repeatedly tried to acquaint her with what to expect during exams. She arranged for some older papers and conducted mock tests at home. During the exams, Meenal went to the exam hall by herself and wrote the paper following the instructions.

Paritosh walked in excitedly a few days after the exams.

“She stood fifth in her class,” he informed her, “It’s unbelievable, Rupali.”

“Really? You have her marks sheet?”

“There is no marks sheet, but I have noted them down. Here. See this. Highest in Maths and Drawing, very good in General Knowledge, and she managed to scrape through even in Hindi and English.”

“Congratulations, Dr. Khanna.”

“Congratulations to you, Rupali. This has all been your hard work.”

“In trying to give each other credit, we are forgetting our little princess here. She is the one who has done it. Meenu. See how well you did. Look at your marks,” Rupali kneeled to talk to Meenal and showed her the diary in which Paritosh had noted down the marks.

“One hundred,” Meenal looked at her score in Maths and said.

“Yes. Full marks. Meenu did very well. We are all so proud of you. Do you want to celebrate, Meenu? What do you want? Sweets? Chocolates?”

“Candy.”

Paritosh looked surprised. “She asked for it?”

“Yes Sir. I was going to tell you that. For last couple of days, she has been telling me when and what she wants to eat.”

Paritosh looked happy and emotional.

“I will get some candies for her,” Rupali made to go to kitchen, when Meenal threw another surprise at them.

“Meenu. Papa. Swimming.”

“Meenu wants to go swimming?” Paritosh asked barely able to hide the quivering in his voice. Before this she used to ask for it only with signals.

“Meenu wants to go swimming,” she repeated after him.

“Now?”

“Now.”

“Let’s go.”

“Don’t you want to change and freshen up, Sir?”

“I’m fine. Will you please bring her candy to the pool.”

“Okay!” The mention of going to the pool after him made her heart jump. Will he be in the water too?

—

He wasn’t! He sat by and watched as Meenal enjoyed water in the lifebuoy.

“Meenu. Candy. Meenu. Candy,” Meenal said when she saw Rupali coming. They put a candy in her mouth without taking her out of the water.

“I have some good news for you too,” Paritosh told Rupali.

“More good news, you mean?” she smiled.

“Yeah,” he laughed slightly. He was very happy, she noticed with satisfaction. “The principal was interested in speaking to you.”

“What for?”

“To see if you would be interested in taking up a job with them. As a teacher. Given Meenu’s performance, he thought you could work with other children…”

Rupali gave a resigned smile, “I don’t think he realizes that I am not even a graduate. He won’t be able to give me a job. Policies won’t allow it. And there would be too many objections.”

“But… Surely there would be a way out. You can help children…”

“You can ask him and satisfy yourself, Dr. Khanna. I have tried enough. I am very happy working with Meenal. Don’t want to try what is beyond me and get disappointed. I think she has had enough,” she pointed towards Meenal and changed the subject, “She wants to get out.”

Paritosh looked thoughtful as he helped Meenal out of the pool.

—

To be continued

Paritosh  stopped in his tracks at the door. Soumitra was back and he was shouting.

“Why is she here? Why was her father here?”

“He came to drop me. I got late,” Rupali replied patiently.

“And because of whom did you get late? Them! Even after that they can’t leave you alone, even at your home now?”

“I need to cook dinner before leaving, Soumitra. Why are we wasting time? What has come upon you? You know how things are.”

“Right. A nice 24/7 job this is. Or even worse. Have you started thinking of yourself as her mother already? What next, Didi? Are you going to get married to him or what? What is going on anyway?”

Rupali was stunned. Sugata admonished Soumitra. He was uncertain doing this. What was wrong with the world? It used to be the other way round all the time. “You are out of your mind, Soumitra. Is this how you talk to Didi?”

“Soumitra,” Paritosh interrupted startling them all. He went to Meenal and took her away from Rupali before continuing further, “What she has done for my daughter, and for that matter for the two of you, is more than what most mothers would be able to do. But don’t worry. I have no intention of saddling her with the burden of an autistic child for life. What you just accused her and me of, is not going to happen.  I am not that selfish.  You can be at ease about that. And if you do plan for a future for your sister, you should do a better job of it.”

He walked out with Meenal.  She didn’t protest. Did she sense the tension, he wondered. He fed her in the car and then drove off.

Back in Rupali’s house, nobody said anything.  Rupali cooked dinner. Sugata helped her, while Soumitra pretended to be busy with his books.

—

The first few moments between Paritosh and Rupali were awkward the next morning.  After she had left Meenal with her exercise books, Rupali brought up the issue. “I’m sorry about Soumitra’s…”

“Don’t!” he stopped her, “Don’t do that. His concern was genuine. He…”

“He was taking out some other frustration, Dr. Khanna. He didn’t mean a word of…”

“Rupali. I am not complaining. What I am saying is that whether or not he meant it, what he said was valid. We… I mean Meenal should not be so dependent on you. It just can’t go on like this… She has to become independent.”

“Of course, she has to become independent. That is what the therapy, schooling, socialization everything is about, isn’t it?”

“I meant independent of you. The real independence, what you are talking about, is going to take years…”

“You don’t think I would be by her until she…”

“It’s too long a time, Rupali…”

“Are you asking me to leave this job?” she tried to steel her voice and not show the anxiety she felt inside.

“Wouldn’t that be good for everyone?”

Her face paled. She looked away and bit her lips. How exactly should she feel? Insulted that he should once again fire her? Insecure that a well-paying job was being taken away and all her financial planning will go haywire again? Heart-broken that she could no longer be around the people she had come to like so much, to love even – Meenal… and her father?

“You don’t agree?” he asked. She was consumed with her own worries. She didn’t realize he wasn’t as certain about it all, as she was imagining him to be. Deep down, he was looking for a discussion, a conversation, an assurance… that she would be around. He could not gather enough courage to ask that directly.

“I? I don’t know… You are her father. You’d know what works the best for her,” she managed to think of a graceful reply. But she spoke it in quite a distracted manner.

“And you? What is best for you?” he asked earnestly.

“Me?”

“Yes Rupali. You!”

She feared that tears would betray her. She closed her eyes and rubbed them, as if having a headache. She opened them and looked at him after she regained some control, “You are asking me what is best for me, Dr. Khanna. Best when? Five years down the line? Ten years down the line? I wish I had enough control over my destiny, and enough foresight, to know what is best for me over the course of my entire life. But I don’t have either. I can only talk about the present. Let’s assume that this job means nothing to me other than it being a job. Like any other, which brings some money. And it doesn’t matter to Meenal or to you who her caretaker is. You can find one, probably someone much cheaper than I am. Let’s assume all that and let’s talk about only the job part of it. What problem do you see in this job? That my brother thinks it is taking up too much of my time. And that sometimes he gets so angry that he starts accusing me… and you of things… I know that it was highly offensive for you Dr. Khanna. But you asked what is best for me. So, let us talk about me. Firstly, is it possible that three people stay together and never have any problems among them? I don’t think so. My leaving this job would not mean that I never have any fights with my brothers. Second, should I take my brother’s objection to my job seriously? Answer is, if I did that, I’d never have had a job.  Given my situation, given my lack of education, I am never going to find a job that would be good enough in his eyes. He is mature for his age, Dr. Khanna. But he is fourteen. He thinks he can run the world, but the world doesn’t run on the whims of fourteen year olds. Not unless they are the children of rich and powerful people. I remember what I was like at that age, and how I often fought with, and hurt my parents. There is only so much about him that I can take seriously. His objection to my jobs isn’t one of them. He has never liked a single a job that I have ever picked up. And finally, why only him? Even I have never liked any of the jobs I have picked up. Not before this one. What are my options if I have to leave this job? Going back to work on the shop floor of a supermarket, and not being allowed to sit down for hours at stretch? Yes – Meenal’s welfare should not be compromised because I need a job and money. But you asked what is best for me. Why don’t you tell me? What do you think is best for me?”

A stunned silence prevailed between them for a few moments as Paritosh reflected on the things she had just said. He knew that her finances were fragile. It had been a while since he had known her, but he hadn’t been able to internalize what it meant in everyday life. It meant that a costly gift could be an affront to self-respect, and not a sign of care. It meant that you couldn’t quit even a menial job to take care of the family, because the money it brought was required to take care of that very family. It meant that you made compromises between spending time with the family, and earning enough for them.

“I hope I am saying it for the last time,” he spoke slowly after a while, “I am sorry. Rupali, I mess it up every time. I won’t do that again. I am sorry I even asked. You must stay. You will, won’t you?”

“Can you trust me, Dr. Khanna that I won’t just disappear one day. It’s a job, yes! But it is the first job that I don’t want to quit. I won’t leave Meenal to her own devices so long as she needs me.”

“I trust you, Rupali. With Meenal, I trust you more than I trust myself. And with your brothers, and yourself, if I can be of any help, in anything, ever… I will be a very happy man.”

—

To be continued

“Yes. It wasn’t possible to provide for everyone, if I didn’t work full time.”

“Don’t you feel bitter? At fate?”

“I don’t know. I probably don’t think much. Not as much as you,” she replied and realized that it was indeed true. Ever since she had rushed to the accident site, hugged her eight-year old brothers, and realized that their parents were dead, all her mind was occupied with was what to do next. “I have always been in a rush,” she continued, “To find a place to stay in, to find a job, to earn enough to pay their school fees, to make sure that they ate, to ensure that I myself don’t fall ill…”

He stared at her, his expressions a mixture of astonishment and admiration. Money makes a whole lot of difference. Loss of people would not make the life such a hardship if there was money. If after Amrit’s death, he had to worry even about how to provide for Meenal, how to pay enough to hire a caretaker, life would have been so much more miserable. He wasn’t even dependent on his job for his financial security. If Rupali hadn’t come, he had almost made up his mind to leave his job to take care of his daughter and to give her his full attention.

But then, was it the money that made Amrit so weak and dependent? Would she have been more of a fighter, if she hadn’t always had things easy? It was a weird thought.

Rupali grew conscious of his stare. “I am boring you,” she chuckled nervously.

“No!” he replied, “I want to know. How did you manage? What happened after their death?” His voice was eager.

She took a deep breath. It was the first time she would recall everything. She was scared of the exercise. Still, she went ahead. The first few days were hazy. But she remembered getting help from neighbors. She managed to get the little money that was lying in the bank. It wouldn’t last for long. Her father’s earnings were not a lot. She could not find any insurance papers either, which everyone asked her to look for. Probably there were none. She would have to earn. But before she could do anything about it, roof over their heads became uncertain. The landlord wanted a family in his house. A young orphaned girl with two children wasn’t an ideal tenant. Who knew what she would do in his house? He wanted her to vacate the house within a month. “You should live with your relatives,” he declared. The neighbors could not help this time. It was his house; he could decide whatever he wanted. They did offer her shelter for appearance sake, but it wasn’t sincere and it would not be a long-term solution.

Some friends, who were not form the city, and who were staying here for studies, came to her rescue. They found a room for her in their Paying Guest (PG) accommodation, where she stayed with Soumitra and Sugata, while looking for a job.  She had sold off every household article possible, except her newly acquired computer, before shifting. That got her some more cash. Some of other girls staying in the house were cooperative and they looked after the boys, while she was away on her job search. But others objected very soon. It was a women’s PG. So what if the boys were merely eight-years old. They couldn’t stay there for long. As soon as she got a job as a floor helper at a retail store, she moved out to her current accommodation. It belonged to the parents of one of her school friends. They took pity on her and charged nominal rent. Sometimes she could not manage to pay rent for months. They did not bother her. It wasn’t a great place. But they had a roof over their head. They made a cozy home out of it. Since then, it had always been the search for the next job that would pay better. When she joined the pharmacy a couple of months ago, she realized that she could earn more by taking night shifts. So, she volunteered to do all the night shifts. That also opened up the possibility of taking up another day-time job.

“Now that I think about it Dr. Khanna, I have been lucky. If one landlord or a few girls at a PG created troubles, many more friends came forward to help. My brothers were so young, but they never gave me any problems. They looked after themselves while I worked. And they take as much care of me today, as I do of them. So, I’m not bitter. Incomplete as it might be, I have a home and a family.”

“Incomplete? If you look at it from my perspective, between three children, you have been able to create a more functional and complete family than us; even with two adults at the helm!” He didn’t explain it. That their marriage was hitting the rocks even before Meenal was born. A child was supposed to solve their problems…

She suddenly felt tired of the gloominess. “What would you take to stop beating yourself up?” she asked with unusual sauciness to change the mood.

He laughed, not loudly, but genuinely, “Nothing. I am trying to learn.”

“Oh God!” she jumped as she noticed the time, “It’s already six. I need to go.”

He realized that it’d cut down on her sleep time. “Let me drop you. It will be faster.”

“No… That’s not required, Sir. And you have to stay with Meenal.”

“Meenal won’t mind a little outing either. Let’s go.”

—

When they reached her home, Meenal wouldn’t let her go. She cried until Rupali picked her up and took her inside with her.

Paritosh grew embarrassed. “This was a bad idea!”

“No Sir. There is no problem. She just likes to stay around. I can sleep, if you don’t mind waiting.”

“Like I have a choice! But I am not carrying her snacks and milk.”

“Sugata and Soumitra will be here in an hour. They can get whatever she needs.”

“Once they come, I will myself go out and get it. But you must sleep right away. Please go.”

—

“Dr. Khanna?” Sugata and Soumitra were surprised to find him at their house when they came back.

“Hi Soumitra, Sugata. Good that you are back. I need to step out…”

“Sugata,” Soumitra said dryly, “Can you check if any luggage tempo is available from the market. We need to load the washing machine…”

“What? No,” Paritosh interrupted, “That’s not needed Soumitra. Rupali and I have talked about it.”

“And she is fine with it?”

“Yes, she is.”

“Great!” Soumitra threw his bag on one of the cots and went out of the house.

Sugata looked about confused about what to do. “I… I am sorry, Dr. Khanna. He had a bad day. You said you had to step out.”

“Uh… Yeah,” despite the worry about Soumitra’s behavior, Meenal’s food must be there in time. “Rupali is sleeping. Meenal is with her and is refusing to come with me. I need to buy something for her. If you are around for a while…”

“Yeah. No problem. I will be here.”

“Thanks. I will be back in ten minutes.”

—

To be continued

She had felt this to be the case for a while. When she had seen him in the pool with his brothers for the first time. Teaching them, and laughing like there were no worries in the world! But now she was sure. He wasn’t a loner by nature. He wasn’t this unsmiling, bitter man either. He could and wanted to smile. He wanted to be happy, to have company, to have a social life. But he felt trapped. When his wife didn’t stand by him, he couldn’t be blamed to think that nobody else will. He couldn’t bring himself to smile, because his daughter never smiled back. He was resigned to never hearing her call him “Papa”. No wonder he found it difficult to feel happy.

But he should be able to feel happy. He deserved that. He was a nice, kind and simple man. Even if him paying her more could be explained away by her going there on weekends, other things could not be. Having her brothers over ever weekend, and even this washing machine. Although the latter was absurd according to her, him going to that extent to help her showed just how caring and generous a man he was. He deserved happiness as much as anyone else! He got it at times. When he went to the pool with the boys on the weekends, for example. She hadn’t gone with them after the first time. She was not sure about seeing him in the pool again. Wanting to take rest was a genuine alibi, which nobody could oppose.

But his happiness need not be limited to those few hours. Meenal was what she was. She might improve, but she wasn’t going to change. He should be able to find happiness with his daughter. And otherwise!

—

He was back from the college early. The cook wouldn’t come until evening. She offered to make him tea, but he insisted that he’d do it himself. “You already have a hectic schedule. I can’t put more burden on you.” He wouldn’t hear another word on it. He got a cup for her too and they sipped it in silence for a while. Meenal was busy with her drawing book.

He spoke first, “Now that you are here during the day time, I’m thinking of hiring a full time house help.”

“What for?”

“Generally. To take care of the household work, so that you don’t have to cook for Meenal, or clean up things after her.  And,” he chuckled slightly, “To make tea whenever we want.”

Another favor!

“Dr. Khanna…” she hesitated. How to bring the topic up?

“What happened?” he sensed her turmoil.

“That washing machine. You must take it back. Soumitra didn’t tell me you were involved. Else I’d have known already…”

“Why didn’t he tell you that I was involved? And why should I take it back?”

“I think he didn’t tell me because he also suspected what I know. It wasn’t from some reuse, recycle drive. It is your machine.”

“It’s not!”

“I can’t believe we are having this conversation. Fine. If I have to prove it as if it is a court, then let me tell you this. I had seen the machine earlier. I don’t know why I didn’t recall when Soumitra brought it home. But yesterday I saw the new machine in the utility area. It is a no-brainer.”

Paritosh looked lost for a moment. But he recovered. “Fine. I accept. The machine was my own. But it had indeed broken down. And there was indeed a drive by my club. I had decided to…”

“What club? You never go to any club!”

“I never go. But I am a lifetime member. Wait a minute,” he went away for a while and came back with his laptop, “See this e-mail. From the club? The drive? Happy?”

Rupali looked confused, while Paritosh thanked his stars; that the idea of doing it this way had come to him only after seeing the e-mail from the club. The heap of unwashed clothes he had seen at Rupali’s place had always been on his mind. And every weekend she came there, he agonized over how many hours of sleep she would have lost in washing them! The machine wasn’t broken. He had purposefully cut the wire to make it appear broken. So, he was still lying to Rupali. But at least he had a way of convincing her.

“But a washing machine?” she finally managed an uncertain-sounding protest.

“Well yes. A washing machine. I could have taken it to the club. But I remembered Soumitra’s interest in machines. So, I thought why not!”

“I don’t know about all this. This is too costly a gift. You must take it back.”

“I am not taking it back. It was not a gift. But if you don’t want it, give it away.”

“How childish is that?”

“Just let it go, Rupali. Let it go for my sake. It will make me happy, really happy.”

The checked Rupali’s reaction. Will it make him happy? Really? Or did he say that just to silence her? But how would he know that she cared for his happiness enough to… She looked up. His face had flushed. He had obviously said that without thinking about it. Something said without any design could not be a lie.  “Fine,” she said with a resigned sigh, “But please. Don’t do something like this again. This is…”

“I won’t,” her sudden capitulation surprised him. What had he said? That it will make him happy? Did it matter so much to her? That she would agree to what, just moments earlier, she was vehemently against? Whatever be the case, he didn’t want her changing her mind. So, he agreed immediately. “I won’t do anything like this again. I realize I should have told you directly whatever I intended to do.”

She nodded.

“Thank you,” he could not suppress a happy smile.

“Thank you? For what?”

“For indulging me,” he was genuine.

“Now that is called having your cake and eating it too. I get the washing machine, and I get thanked too!”

He laughed, almost mesmerizing her.

“You know, it is not such a bad thing,” she spoke cautiously, “Laughing. And being happy.”

He stopped laughing and looked at her questioningly.

“I mean,” she explained, “I haven’t seen you smiling or laughing very often. Not even with Meenal.”

His expression became grave and he looked away.

“You probably think that she doesn’t understand. I think she does. She doesn’t have the ability to express herself, show affection, or talk about her pleasures and pains. But that does not mean that she doesn’t feel them.”

“How do you know?” he asked. His question was sincere, not sarcastic.

“I don’t know. I just believe.”

“I hope you are right, Rupali. I hope that she understands what she means to me; or will understand someday.”

“You can’t lose hope!”

“You are an eternal optimist, aren’t you?”

“I have survived till now. I am happy about it. Is that the meaning of optimism?”

“You had to drop out of college because of your parent’s death?”

She hesitated for a bit. Was she ready to talk about her life? With him? She looked at him intently. There was a softness in his features, in perfect harmony with care and concern his eyes expressed. She could talk to him. Unburdening herself a little would be good for her too.

—

To be continued

He came to his senses slowly and let her go. By the time she could see him, the split second expression of realization and embarrassment on his face was wiped off. Tears had betrayed him and he tried to wipe them discreetly. But it wasn’t possible to hide them.

“I… I’m sorry. I got carried away. This was a first. She has never called me ‘Papa’. She has never uttered that word in her life,” he explained.

“Really?” That brought Rupali out of her reverie.

“Yes. I… I will never forget this day, Rupali. Thank you. For everything.”

Rupali didn’t know what to say.

“Mamma…. Mamma…” They couldn’t be sure what Meenal was thinking at that moment. But her coming to Rupali at that time with those words was both cute and awkward at the same time.

“Excuse me. I will be back in a minute,” his eyes were filled with tears again and he did not want to break down before them. Rupali understood that. The weather was good. She took Meenal with her and decided to take a walk. She walked by the utility area and something that had been bugging her at the back of her mind surfaced up. The washing machine installed there was new! She realized what had made her uncomfortable about the washing-machine at her home, apart from the unbelievable story. That machine had looked familiar. Why didn’t she realize this earlier? The machine had not come from some club. It had come from Dr. Khanna. What the hell? What was she supposed to do?

She decided to confront Soumitra first. That evening itself.

“You lied to me?” she was livid, “Why would you do something so stupid? Do you have any idea how much does a machine like this cost?”

“Listen to me, Didi. I didn’t tell you that Dr. Khanna was involved, because I thought you would not accept it then. But he did tell me that it was a part of the drive from his club and I did repair it.”

“What club? When does he ever go to a club, you fool? He goes to the college and comes back home as soon as he can. And this machine was at his home. I was a bigger fool to have not realized this. It is going back tomorrow. And don’t do such things in future.”

Soumitra didn’t remember ever having been scolded by his sister like that. He burst into tears. That made Rupali forget her fury for a while. “Look here. Now, don’t cry. I am sorry, I shouldn’t have scolded you like that…”

“I’m sorry. I… I knew that story can’t be true. But it was… You have to go for both your jobs on the weekends also. This is so helpful… I gave into the temptation.”

“I know. I know you did it for me. Unfortunately that doesn’t make it right. But there is nothing to worry about. Now that I am sure, I will talk to Dr. Khanna and return the machine.”

—

It wasn’t the first time Paritosh was thinking about her as he tossed and turned in the bed. She had been in his thoughts ever since Meenal had spotted her in the supermarket. He hadn’t expected that anything would come out of it. She was just a young girl they had run into by accident. Meenal had identified with her out of a sheer coincidence. She looked like that actress, the actress playing the mother to her favorite character. Despite that, he had thought about her. He didn’t have much hope even when Meher mentioned the possibility of her becoming Meenal’s caretaker. She needed a job, alright. But what were the chances that she would be patient enough to take care of an autistic child? Slim at best! But he had thought about her that night too; thinking of the conversation that was to happen the following day. In his thoughts it always resulted in her throwing up her hands and walking away. She couldn’t possibly do it.

But it hadn’t happened that way. He should have probed a bit more, but seeing Meenal call her “Mamma” again, he took a spontaneous decision. It couldn’t be particularly risky. Meher knew her pretty well. At the very least, no harm would come out of it. He would probably get a call within minutes of leaving Meenal with her and she would walk out.

But that hadn’t happened either. He had waited for her call on the first day. It hadn’t come. He had been frightened when he had come back, but that too had turned out to be a minor issue; one of the numerous that she had figured out since then.

What did happen was that she had been ahead of him in anticipating and fulfilling his daughter’s needs. She had started teaching her before he could zero in on a therapist or tutor. She had come up with the schooling plan. She was working harder than the therapist on Meenal. And she had taught her the word that he had lost all hopes of ever hearing from her. Papa! Tears still came to his eyes, when he recalled what he had heard that evening. “Meenu loves Papa.” He didn’t need to record that voice to remember it forever!

What she had done for his daughter evoked a lot of gratitude in him. But what had made him admire her thoroughly was what she was doing for her brothers. After coming back from her house on the fateful day of firing her, he had looked up the biodata she had given. If his calculations were correct, her parents had died when she was eighteen and that’s when she had dropped out of college after first year; to take care of her brothers and earn for them. It was no mean feat. Without even a college degree. She had taken up all sorts of jobs, as her biodata reflected. And still, she had done a fine job of raising her brothers. They seemed responsible, bright, young boys.

He couldn’t help compare her to Amrit. Two people couldn’t have been more different. Ruapli wasn’t a thing of beauty. Her complexion was on the darker side. The hard work and stress of all these years had worn down even her youthful appearance prematurely. She didn’t have education; or an elite upbringing. She counted her pennies. But at this stage of life Paritosh knew something about life that he hadn’t known when he had met Amrit. He knew that love and compatibility was not about whether they liked the same restaurants, same music and same holiday destinations. It wasn’t about looking good together. It was about sticking together, through thick and thin.

He wasn’t surprised that he had fallen for her. When he had hugged her that evening, it was because he had been overwhelmed. It was almost a substitute for the hug he couldn’t have given to his daughter. But he wasn’t surprised that it had turned into something else. She had probably felt it too, as her flushed face indicated.

It wasn’t the surprise that was keeping him awake. It was the thought of what to do about it? Or rather how to ensure that he never ended up expressing his feelings again?

—

To be continued

Principal of the school agreed to let her write the exams. Paritosh would pay the regular hefty fee of the school, even though Meenal was not to attend the classes. Tutoring was to be the individual decisions of teachers. As far as the school was concerned, they were allowed to give tuitions outside the school; and charge for it.

“You would pay the entire fee?” Rupali was shocked to hear that.

He shrugged. “I wasn’t in a bargaining position.”

“It probably wasn’t a good idea,” Rupali felt guilty about coming up with an idea that would result in such absurd expenses. He would also be paying for therapists and tutors.

“Rupali,” Paritosh spoke impatiently, “We all deal with our individual constraints. Thankfully, where my daughter is concerned, money is not my constraint.”

She felt foolish. He was right. Money was not a constraint for him. Why was she judging his situation in the context of her problems? He probably felt offended that she brought the concern of money in between at all.

“Right. Sorry. I didn’t mean that you would compromise on Meenal’s wellbeing.”

Paritosh closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he realized that he might have inadvertently hurt her. “No. I am sorry,” he said, “I didn’t mean that you would suggest that either.”

Rupali couldn’t help smiling, “I guess we can leave it at that.”

“And I will let you decide which subjects we should get tutors for. I will talk to the teachers.”

“Yes Sir.”

—

“Soumitra. This might be of interest to you,” Paritosh told him on a Saturday, when Rupali was not around.

“What?”

“You are interested in machines, gadgets etc. right?”

“I am.”

“My club is running a reuse-recycle drive. People are giving away household appliances, gadgets etc. that are likely to have a minor flaw. Whosoever can repair them is free to take them. For himself, or for resale.”

“Why would anyone give away things that have minor flaw?” Soumitra was not satisfied.

“They might want to buy newer stuff. Happens a lot of times.”

“Hmm…”

“Anyway. What I wanted to ask you is if you would be interested trying to repair a washing machine. Basically members are expected to participate in the drive by giving things away as well as finding people who would repair them and take them. Somebody has saddled me with a washing machine. I can’t think of too many people who would be able to make any sense of the machines. You want to try?”

“That’s weird. I didn’t know such things happened. Else I’d never have Didi buy anything for home.”

Paritosh chuckled. “What else are you interested in? Let me know, and I will see if someone is giving it away.”

“That list would be endless, Dr. Khanna. Where is this washing machine you are talking about?”

“It’s lying in the back yard. Let’s go and check it out. And I have an idea. Let’s keep it a secret from Rupali. Once you have fixed it, I’ll send it to your home. Then you can surprise her.”

“Fantastic idea,” Sugata, who had been a silent listener till now, said excitedly.

“Calm down. Let’s see if I can fix it at all,” Soumitra cautioned him.

“Don’t worry,” Paritosh smiled, “If you can’t, we can always call a mechanic. I just thought you would enjoy it. That’s why didn’t do it already. Your sister will have her surprise!”

—

“Reduce-recycle drive at some club? And you could take away whatever you could repair?” Rupali was unable to make any sense of what Soumitra and Sugata were telling her about the washing machine.

“Yes.”

“And how did you get to know about it?”

“They had come to our school,” Soumitra lied. He already had Sugata in his plan.

“And you repaired a washing machine? Not a phone, an i-pod, or something else that you wanted?”

“This is what I could repair. And it will be helpful, right? You won’t have to wake up at six on Saturdays to wash clothes.”

“Is there something you are not telling me?”

“Oh Didi! Why are you being so skeptical? We haven’t stolen it. Police is not going to come to our doors. Now, can you please be a little happy? It is a useful thing, isn’t it?”

“Yes. It is. I am sorry, I was asking unnecessary questions. Thanks a lot Soumitra,” she didn’t want to offend her brothers. But something was bothering her. The story was too fantastic to be true.

—

Paritosh noticed Rupali hurriedly indicating something to Meenal, when she noticed him coming in. Then she stepped away and smiled at him as usual. Curious, he went to his daughter and kneeled to face her.

“Good evening, Meenu,” he greeted her as usual.

“Good evening, Meenu,” she said without looking at him. He made to get up and go to his room to freshen up. Rupali was disappointed. Her surprise was not going to work! But it did. Before Paritosh had moved away, Meenal said, “Meenu loves Papa.”

Paritosh froze in surprise and disbelief. His face showed no expressions at all. At length he looked at Rupali and asked, “What did she say?”

Rupali had been working hard with Meenal to improve her communication using the techniques therapist had told her about. But his reaction almost frightened her. Did something go wrong? What could have? She stood there tongue-tied.

Meenal spoke again, “Meenu loves Papa.”

There was no uncertainty now. Paritosh was overwhelmed. He instinctively made to hug Meenal; then stopped himself. He could not spoil this moment by upsetting her. He stood up and made no attempts to hide how emotional he was.

“Thank you,” he said choking on his words. And then he could not restrain himself. He went ahead and hugged Rupali.

At first she was shocked at his action. Then as she got a hold of how she was reacting to his proximity, her own reaction surprised her. Gosh! She could stay like this forever. She closed her eyes. What had happened to her? When had she started feeling this way… And what was happening right now? Had she put her own arms around him too? And was his grip tightening around her? More than how just a friendly, emotional hug should be?

—

To be continued

When Meenal woke up and was fed, Rupali decided to try and see if she liked the idea of water and swimming pool. She had read up about many autistic children enjoying swimming. She also wanted to check up on Sugata and Soumitra.

The sight she witnessed at the pool warmed her heart. Paritosh was enthusiastically teaching Soumitra and Sugata. They laughed when either of them did something stupid and Paritosh laughed with them.  And open, loud, heart-felt laughter.

“Meenu. Water. Meenu. Water,” Meenal’s voice drew her attention. Rupali was carrying her in her arms. She was pushing down, indicating that she wanted to get down and go in the water. Rupali let her walk while holding her hands and went closer to the pool.

“Dr. Khanna.”

Paritosh panicked for a bit when he looked at them. Was it safe to have Meenal near the pool? But he saw Rupali holding her hands tightly, and relaxed.

“She seems to like the idea of going in the water. Have you tried to take her to pool earlier?”

“No. I haven’t. I wasn’t sure.”

“There are floatation devices; do you have one?”

“Are you sure it is safe?”

“I have read about it, Sir. And you are here. If she doesn’t like it or can’t handle it, we will take her out immediately.”

“Meenu. Water. Meenu. Water,” Meenal tugged at her hands. She definitely wanted to go in.

“Hold her for a while. I will find a lifebuoy we had bought for a friend’s son. I will need to test it.”

Rupali gasped when Paritosh came out of the water wearing only his swimming costume. He had strong, muscular, shapely body. Did he swim regularly? What was he doing being a professor? He should have been an actor, or a model.

She averted her eyes quickly, hoping that her goose bumps didn’t show and a blush did not visibly creep on her cheeks.

When Paritosh came back with the device, he saw Rupali and Meenal sitting on the edge of the pool, with their feet in the water. Meenal was splashing water with her little limbs and obviously enjoying it.

Meenal was on cloud nine when she was put in water with a lifebuoy. She showed no fear. She wasn’t bothered with strangers. Paritosh continued teaching Sugata and Soumitra while keeping an eye on Meenal. The small gathering in water looked perfectly harmonious.

—

“You have turned her into a devil,” Paritosh said good-humouredly when she reached there the next day. It was a Sunday and Soumitra and Sugata were accompanying her again as Paritosh had requested.

“What happened?”

“She was in the pool for full two hours this morning. She loves the water.”

Rupali smiled and stretched her hands for Meenal. She came to her as usual and held her hands.

“And how are our young swimmers doing?” he asked about Soumitra and Sugata.

“Going ooh-aah-ouch with body pain,” Rupali chuckled, “So much for swimming!”

“Don’t be dissuaded by that. With regular practice that would go away.”

“See. I had told you,” Sugata told Rupali in a challenging tone.

Everyone laughed.

Them spending the weekend at Paritosh’ place became a routine.

—

It was the last day of the month. Paritosh left a cheque for her before leaving for university. She opened the envelope after he left and was surprised to find that the cheque was for twenty thousand rupees.

“Dr. Khanna. There has been some mistake,” she told him when he came back in the evening, “This cheque is for twenty thousand. We had decided only for…”

“No. That’s fine. There is no mistake,” he walked off signaling the end of the discussion.

Rupali wasn’t sure whether to be happy or be worried about it. Extra money would obviously be of great help. He might have given it because he was happy with her work. But what if… what if he was just being charitable given her tough situation. But talking further about it would be uncomfortable for both of them. She kept the cheque in her purse. He came back after washing his hands and went to Meenal.

“I had to show you something,” Rupali said.

“Yeah?”

She handed him two exercise books. One was for Maths and other for drawing. Paritosh was surprised to see the content.

“Who has…”

“Meenal did. She is making great progress with drawing and Maths.”

“You have been teaching her? Who got her these books?”

“I thought of trying. Picked these up from the stationary shop. They are the regular children’s exercise books.”

“She has made these drawings?” Paritosh could not believe it.

“Yes Sir. Her observation is very sharp. She doesn’t miss a thing. Hand-eye coordination is also excellent.”

“And these sums? And multiplication?”

“She progressed very fast. It has hardly been two weeks since I brought these books. I thought I’d tell you after she had made some progress. I didn’t think it would happen so soon. Sir, what have you thought about her schooling?”

He sighed sadly, “I know the principal of Greenwood International School. I spoke to him about it. He politely told me to put her in some special school.”

“But she doesn’t need that…”

“As much as I resent it, I understand his point of view. Their teachers are not trained to take care of children with special needs. She would probably be left out. And yet I can’t put her in… I was thinking of homeschooling. And also of hiring a therapist.”

“But in this country we need certificates and…”

“I don’t know yet…”

“Can I suggest something…” an idea suddenly struck her.

“Go ahead.”

“Can you talk to the principal to see if they would let her take the exams. They don’t need to let her attend the school. Just let us have access to the syllabus and books they use. And if I could talk to the teachers once in a while about what needs to be taught, that would be great…”

Paritosh thought about it for a few moments; then asked her, “You really think that would work?”

“I am thinking aloud, Dr. Khanna. There would be issues, of course. While she made dramatic progress in Maths, English and Hindi have been a challenge with her. I haven’t tried other things yet. But then all kids are good in some subjects and weak in others. It is worth trying. And if you were thinking of homeschooling, you could hire tutors for the subjects she has problems in. Probably teachers of the same school if they agree…”

“Let me think it over,” he said.

“Sure Sir.”

“And… thanks a lot. For these,” he pointed at the exercise books, “You have no idea how much they have bolstered by confidence.”

“No need to thank me, Sir. It’s her own doing. I am only doing my job.”

“If you say so…” he smiled and didn’t argue. She wasn’t just doing her job. Her job was only to keep her safe. She had gone far, far ahead. He wasn’t complaining!

“Irrespective of schooling, if you find a suitable therapist, it would definitely help.”

“I have spoken to someone recently. She might come here for couple of hours every day.”

“Okay.”

—

To be continued

Paritosh lingered around for a while when Rupali reached there the next day. Usually he set out immediately. Was he looking out for her or for Meenal, Rupali wondered. He made some small talk; asked about her job at the pharmacy.

“It’s quite mindless, but it pays,” she replied with a smile, “Thankfully not many people had any emergency last night. Not much business.”

He chuckled slightly at that. That was a first too! After the smile last evening… And he looked good when he did that. His features softened, his eyes smiled. It was difficult to fathom that this man could have just walked in yesterday and fired her ruthlessly. Was something the matter?

He came back early in the evening too. Half an hour earlier than usual. He had called up the cook on his way and asked her to come earlier. “She will make tea,” he informed her, “Have some before leaving.” He was really trying hard to make up for his behavior yesterday.

“I never got to ask,” she decided to face the issue head on over tea, “Why had you come back in the afternoon yesterday?” His face clouded. She figured she might have asked something she shouldn’t have. “You don’t have to answer,” she added in a small voice.

“No. That’s fine,” he gathered himself together, “You deserve an explanation, even if it is inadequate.” She looked up at him questioningly.  He continued, “It was Amrit’s, Meenal’s mother’s, death anniversary.”

“Ohh!” He must have been upset. “I… I am sorry.” But why was there no puja, no rituals that the occasion demanded? Did he not believe in them? But even non-believers didn’t usually skip some bare minimum rituals?

“We had been trying for a baby for a long time before Meenal was born. When she was about two-years old, her symptoms became difficult to ignore. Amrit was severely disappointed when the diagnosis came. She could never accept Meenal’s condition,” Paritosh went on talking, “People, especially relatives, are not always kind in their remarks. And Amrit could not ignore them. I tried my best, but… She couldn’t stand being taunted for giving birth to a retarded girl.”

“Meenal is not retarded,” Rupali could not help interrupting.

“No. She is not. But abandoning her wouldn’t be justified even if she were. Amrit committed suicide. She left her daughter. Social stigma became more important for her than her little girl. I will never be able to forgive her.”

That explained why he didn’t want to do anything in her memory. Rupali had nothing to say. She stayed silent.

“She had overdosed on sleeping pills. Doctor had prescribed them because of her depression. I would have thought it was an accident, but there was a suicide note too. When I came home that day, I found Meenal playing at her side. She looked asleep. But she was dead.”

Damn! That explained his reaction to her sleeping yesterday. “You were reminded of that when you saw me sleeping yesterday?” she asked.

He nodded. “It was unfair. But… I don’t know what had come upon me.”

“Try not to be so hard on yourself, Dr. Khanna. Life is not kind to us. If we also treated ourselves ruthlessly, we won’t survive.”

He looked at her appreciatively. “You’d survive it. You have learned life’s lessons well.” The smile that he gave after that affected her  – she felt a knot in the pit of her stomach, and a quickening of heartbeat.

“I need to leave now, Dr. Khanna. Take care.”

“You too. Bye!”

—

“Rupali,” at some point of time he had switched to calling her by her name instead of ‘Ms. Banerjee’. Rupali didn’t remember when that happened, but this felt more natural. “About tomorrow…” It was a Friday. The weekends were here again.

“I will come, Sir. No problem.” Sugata and Soumitra had accepted it, even if grudgingly. She had promised that she’d try to get a day off from Pharmacy.

“Your brothers… They don’t have school tomorrow, right?”

“No.”

“They could come with you. That way you’d get to spend time with them too. And they could bring their books or whatever they need, if they have to study or finish some other work.”

“That’s… That’s a very kind offer, Sir. But too many people may disturb Meenal and…”

“There is only one thing we do not lack here. Space,” he looked around sadly, “They can have one of the guest rooms to themselves. And there are the lawns, the swimming pool. At how many places would Meenu be at any time?”

“I… I will check with them…”

“If you want I can speak to them.”

She chucked slightly, “It’s okay, Sir. They won’t need a formal invitation if they want to come.”

“And don’t bother with cooking. I’ll have breakfast and lunch cooked here.”

“Sir…”

“Please. I insist.”

She nodded looking uncomfortable.

“And Rupali…”

“Yes Sir?”

He had remembered the heap of unwashed clothes. He thought of asking her to bring them over as well and they will get washed in the machine. But she already was already uncomfortable with him trying to make things easier. So, he decided against saying anything about it.

“Nothing. Just… Thanks for accommodating and do try to convince your brothers to come.”

“Yes Sir.”

—

“Why should we go there? We have our own home.” Sugata was at his rebellious best again. But Rupali had sensed that he was curious and wanted to come.

“Well. One reason is that he has a swimming pool at his house,” Soumitra said while suppressing a smile.

“Swimming pool?” That got him Sugata’s attention.

“How do you know about the swimming pool?” Rupali was surprised. She hadn’t noticed it herself. She didn’t know of its existence until he mentioned it to her that evening.

“They were cleaning it the day I had gone there. I just asked casually.”

“Fine. Both of you are coming. Make sure to pack your books though; not swimming dreams. I am not asking him for access to swimming pool. And no one is there to teach you.”

“I know how to swim,” Sugata protested loudly.

Soumitra looked at him skeptically with arched brows. “A little at least,” he added in a small voice drawing a chuckle from his brother and sister.

“Books! Remember to pack your books. Exams are barely a month away.”

—

“Who wants to go swimming?”

Meenal was taking a nap and Rupali was with her brothers in one of the guestrooms, when Paritosh walked in. He must have overheard them.

“No… Nobody Sir,” Rupali stammered. He had been too indulging recently and she didn’t want any more of it. It was uncomfortable. And they shouldn’t get used to it.

“Do either of you swim?” Paritosh ignored her and asked her brothers directly.

“I do…  A little,” Sugata replied despite Rupali’s earlier admonitions. He was eager to get his hands on a pool.

“How about you, Soumitra?”

“No. I have never been in a pool.”

“And even Sugata doesn’t know it too well, Dr. Khanna,” Rupali spoke again.

“Don’t be so afraid, Rupali. They are big boys. The pool is shallow. They can easily stand in it. They won’t drown, even if they try. Come, let’s go.”

Soumitra looked at Rupali for approval. But she was too confused to give him any signals. Sugata meanwhile jumped out of chair he was sitting in and got ready to go. Rupali did not have the heart to check his excitement at this point. She shrugged with a smile. They went off.

—

To be continued